TAGS — Icebreath approaches on weary paws at their leader's call, scanning the gathering cats for anyone they'd feel comfortable enough to approach. Rainpaw, Smokestep, and Strawmoon have yet to arrive — but Firefang is already here. They pause on the outskirts of the steadily increasing throng, briefly debating whether they should sit beside her. Would that be weird? ...
No, obviously not, they chastise themselves. If they're at a level where Firefang can confide in them about her personal issues, Icebreath can tearfully seek comfort in her, and they can sleep under the stars together, they can sit next to her at a meeting for StarClan's sake. They're friendly now. It still feels kinda weird to acknowledge that, as if Icebreath didn't think Firefang was one of the most annoying, rude cats in the clan up until fairly recently, in the grand scheme of things. Granted, she still is annoying and rude... which makes it all the more special that Icebreath's no longer an unwilling recipient of that attitude. It's a good feeling, a reminder of how far they've come from the weak, useless little apprentice they once were (even if it feels like she still has a ways to go, she's really been trying to let herself trust Sootstar's judgment in her early promotion).
Her pale gaze subtly lingers on Periwinklepaw and Azaleapaw on her way to Firefang's side — lousy excuses for WindClan apprentices like them are helpful reminders that she probably doesn't have too much to worry about. If
she managed to scrape by and earn Sootstar's favor, they're beyond saving. Naturally, spotting Gravelpaw sitting alongside the pair comes as a surprise; he's one of the last cats she'd expect to willingly associate with them, especially after his hostility in the whole thorn confrontation. She tries not to look at him for too long on her way past the trio, quickly redirecting her gaze forward and hoping no accidental eye contact was made before taking a seat beside Firefang and murmuring a quick hello, hoping she doesn't seem awkward.
They listen dutifully as the meeting commences, tail tip twitching without end. Nerves reflexively flare up at the mention of StarClan's lightning; naturally, Icebreath had heard all about it once the gathering patrol returned. She hadn't gone that night, though she likely should've considering her warrior name was announced to the rest of the clans, but the thought of facing RiverClan after everything was far too anxiety-inducing to bear — enough to make her nauseous. She'd embellished
just how horrible she felt that night to drive it home and make sure no one could rightfully insist or question her. And after hearing how the entire night went, they're definitely glad they didn't go; between the lightning and all of the vitriolic feuding, she probably would've had a nervous breakdown.
Vulturemask's interpretation, spoken with conviction, comes as a relief. She hadn't been
too worried, though. At least, that's what she tells herself. How could StarClan take issue with WindClan for retaliating against a clan harboring a murderer? The clan who'd broken the peace they'd been promised by the stars! A clan full of traitors and lawless brutes! But it is nice to have this reassurance to quell the whispers in the back of her mind.
The meeting continues and her eyes are pulled back to Sootstar. A long list of soon-to-be apprentices is recited, including Sootstar and Weaselclaw's litter. What an exciting day! It'd be such an honor to mentor one of them. She often wonders what that'd be like and has briefly entertained the idea, but it was quickly, decisively dismissed; she's a brand new warrior and nowhere near as capable as most of her clanmates. Her panic and general uselessness after finding Cottonkit and Burnetkit in the tunnels was a good reminder of how little she knows about dealing with little ones, as much as she enjoys being around them. With thoughts like these in mind, Firefang being paired with the newly named Harrierpaw comes as a surprise; she's a greenhorn. But she knows what she's doing; they've heard from Snailpaw how she held her own in battle, and its no secret how loyal she is. They glance at the dark-furred molly beside them with a smile, murmuring,
"Congratulations," before she rises to meet her new apprentice. Bluepaw is paired with Sootstar herself, and then—
Oh, stars.
She's mentoring Cottonpaw. Her stomach does a flip as her own name is called; Sootstar speaks with the same confidence she had when announcing Icebreath's promotion. They want to call their leader's faith in them inexplicable, and like last time they fight back the self-doubt by reminding themselves that they've earned her favor for a reason. They're dutiful, loyal, and skilled on at least some level. But—
stars, they're so new to all of this and it's been so hard to adjust to being a warrior, to losing Nightmareface's guidance and the cushion of being given some leeway to make mistakes as an apprentice. As a warrior promoted moons early, that security is gone; each mistake is now a reason for Sootstar to doubt her judgment about Icebreath. And
now... now her mistakes have
so much more weight! She'll be letting Sootstar
and Cottonpaw down, and it would be so shameful if they messed up bad enough that Cottonpaw got reassigned to a new mentor, and Sootstar's eyes will probably be glued to them since Icebreath's now responsible for her
daughter's training and safety in the treacherous tunnels— oh no, the tunnels are
so dangerous! What if there's an accident? What if Icebreath gets her leader's daughter maimed? Killed?
Suddenly Cottonpaw is approaching her, yanking the nearly trembling warrior from her tumultuous thoughts. Owlishly wide eyes blink down at the little molly as they hastily stand up and pad up to meet her, returning her smile as convincingly as they can manage. Their noses touch, and the contact and this whole situation feel so bizarre.
I still feel like an apprentice, she muses.
How am I supposed to train one? "I know you will," she replies numbly to her new charge. They notice her following them as they return to their seat, realizing she's about to be their shadow for many moons to come.
჻ 001 GENERAL INFORMATION ,
