A JOB THAT SLOWLY KILLS YOU ⋆⁺₊ ☾ ⁺₊⋆ sharpshadow

[Swansong]

⋆⁺₊ ☾ ⁺₊⋆ "Quite the honor, chosen by the stars..." Her voice is a soft trill as she addresses the deputy. He leads their patrol with the same tenseness as he always carries himself, every muscle taut as a string about to snap. A dark and unruly pelt curls in upon itself, a ghostly memory of a slouch. Swansong is lucky to have inherited her mother's posture instead. Dark eyes dart around wildly, and they cannot help but think that she hardly looks the part of deputy.

Their graceful stride quickens to meet Sharpshadow's pace. She lets the rest of the patrol fall behind, eyes set upon the deputy. "I suppose you are... better equipped than most, hm..? Mentored by the best of deputies..." Her voice softens at the memory, but does not shake. She has long trapped the grief within her chest, set alongside the hollow aching of her nightmares. "Or at least... he lasted the longest, my father..." The words are distant. There are few within the clan who can hold a candle to Smogstar, steady and reliable until the illness claimed him.

She smiles, attempts to drag her wandering mind from the past. "I hope you will be as fortunate..."

I FELL ASLEEP WITH A VISION ⋆⁺₊ ☾ ⁺₊⋆ AND I ALMOST PULLED IT THROUGH‎

• @SHARPSHADOW
• 
  
  

  "SPEECH"

• 
  SWANSONG ☾ she / they, warrior of shadowclan, 20 moons.
  ★ a pale, silky-furred cream tabby with tired blue eyes.
  ★ dreamy and detached, known for her perpetual sleepiness.
  ★ halfshade x smogstar, littermate to applejaw, garlicheart, & ashenfall.
  ★ peaceful and healing powerplay permitted / / underline and tag when attacking
  ★ penned by SATURNID ↛ saturnids on discord, feel free to dm for plots.

​

 

[SHARPSHADOW]

Oh, it's his attention she wants. By now, he should probably be used to it... By now, Ternstar was due for a disappearance, too. Evidently, Sharpshadow didn't see StarClan's intrusions in the same light Swansong did. At the very least, before Ternstar, he could've expected to be next in line for it— more questions, and then... nothing; but now the odds that he'd be unceremoniously made a nobody were just as high. ...Not that Mapletuft was— had been a nobody. Sharing a title didn't immediately make you something you're not... clearly.

" ...Ternstar chose me, " it takes him too long to respond, probably. He's sure Mapletuft didn't spend moments gawking at cats that were talking to her before replying. Nor Mirestar, nor... Smogstar. Smogmaw. ...She's invited the comparison herself, and yet she prickles anew beneath the weight of that name. Beneath the stare of his kit. Sharpshadow glances away for a moment. Briefly, mangy fangs catch on her lip. " The stars could toss me aside any second. "

Of course she's thinking about Smogstar... If just one of the guy's measly apprentices couldn't shake the thought of him, why would his kit ever be able to? The best of deputies... Sharpshadow's jaw clenches. Did he deserve to be referred to that way? With that slouch of his, his dull drone, a sinking feeling, whenever Sharpshadow spoke to him...

But, he'd made her desperate too; desperate to grasp onto things she had no hope of holding onto... It was cruel, wasn't it? But maybe it's kept her alive, too. But after what he did...

Well, Smogstar and Smogmaw might as well be different people, she guesses.

Sharpshadow's frown deepens. She meant to say something else... but it'd gotten lost somewhere, apparently. Her blink is slow, not steady. " I.. I guess he taught me to be stubborn, " finally, she says. " ...Probably didn't teach me. It probably just, um, rubbed off... " That's how things always seemed to be for him. Easy, effortless... Yeah, when Chilledstar named him deputy, it'd been the most natural thing in the world, for him. Sharpshadow would be stupid to think he could ever pull off the same... It was a good thing he'd never thought so, right? Had only hoped... And hoped...

" I... I hope so too. Not like that's gotten me much, so far... " He sighs through his nose. " If nothing else, just so ShadowClan can have one less thing to worry about... " That was more important than his own life, really.