private all we got was blues } venomstrike

[RATTLEHEART]

The sun was dipping down beneath the horizon by the time Rattleheart finally allowed herself to relax, having been fighting through the burning pain in her side to try and help out as much as she could around their little scattered group. She knew no one was trying to force her into helping even with her injury, but she felt obligated to - after all, it was partially her fault that all of this had happened. Though she would never regret helping Sunstride bring those kits back to their home, she knew that if not for that decision, none of them would be here at the Horseplace. That alone was enough to motivate her, even as each step sent tiny shocks of pain through her body in spite of her best efforts to be careful.

Now though, her mind had drifted to a familiar pelt made up of dark shades, and a bright yellow gaze that seemed to glow in comparison to her own. She had seen him a couple of times in the group in their frantic travels to the Horseplace, but she hadn't had the chance to speak with him until now. Speak with him about all that had happened, and speak with him about the feelings that she had been shoving down inside. Feelings that had only been laying dormant, rushing immediately back up to the surface the moment she saw him leap into the fray for her. The tunneler wouldn't soon forget the way that he had fought for her, shoving down Harbingermoon and tearing away at his flesh merely for daring to attack her. That alone had been enough to convince her of how much Venomstrike truly cared about her, more than quite possibly anyone else who wasn't her own kin.

She hadn't been protecting him by avoiding him for so long - she had merely been hurting the both of them.

Slow, careful pawsteps carried her over to the side of the twoleg barn, where she pressed the non-bloodied side of her pelt against Venomstrike's. The tunneler no longer shies away from his touch, instead leeching off of his nearby warmth as she lets her head rest against him. A moment of silence is allowed between them, something peaceful and unhurried in the midst of nothing but chaos, and running. "I'm glad you're alright. And that you're here with us." Suddenly her words are caught in her throat, weighed down and twisted like they've dug down into her insides and refuse to be released. "And... and I'm sorry. For everything that happened." For hurting you, for avoiding you, for getting you sick in the first place. Why aren't you angry?
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[ PENNED BY EO ]​

 

[VENOMSTRIKE]

BUT AFTER WE'VE WEATHERED — Venomstrike remained attentive with his body tense but now as everyone finally settled down within the Horseplace, he can feel the tension from his muscles loosening as he relaxed as best as he could. He grimaces at the taste of Harbingermoon's blood on his tongue thinking about how he had practically torn into the other tom for clawing Rattleheart. His heart aches preparing to potentially lay by himself for the night but decides to stay up, just in case, with both ears pricked forward yet the sound of approaching pawsteps make his whiskers twitch and he believes it to be Redpaw at first until he hears her voice speak to him. The ache lifting as a soft flutter occurs in his belly, ears laying flat against his head, and he does not look at her. It's not that he doesn't want to... He sincerely wishes it to simply lock his bright yellows with her green eyes yet he cannot will himself to do so instead he simply listens to her speak finding comfort in her voice after not hearing it for a while. Oh, how she had avoided him like he still had the plague and how much it hurt him. How it hurt to see flashes of black and white walking the other way not even sparing him a glance or breath.

"And... and I'm sorry. For everything that happened."

His throat constricts with emotion unable to bring forth words much like on the battlefield and he shuffles his front paws to stare down at them trying to figure out what to say. Even if he had felt anger towards the loyalist during the battle he could never bring himself to feel such a way towards Rattleheart is what he realizes despite how she avoided him for whatever reason that he could not comprehend. "D... Did I do something wrong?" His voice hoarse as he finally pushes the words forward, his tone genuine with sadness dribbling from it. What has he done? Still he refuses to look at her as he feels his eyes beginning to sting once more, he puts one of his paws over the other one still keeping to himself but allowing Rattleheart to lean against him and leech whatever warmth she wanted from him "I'm... sorry..." He truly didn't know.

Had he been able to... Had he not been a coward. He would've gone along with the rest of the Windclanners to retrieve the lungwort for her even if he faced potential death on every corner, he would do anything for her. He would die for her and kill for her if need be... Harbingermoon being an almost example of that. Had Sunstride not called for everyone to retreat then he would've tore more than an ear off of the other tom, his jaw clenching as teeth pressed into each other tightly as if imagining the other's jugular between his jaws until he snapped it in two. All for her.

He falls silent.

HELL AND HIGH WATER ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ TO LAY HERE TOGETHER

• 

• 
  ➷ shorthaired lilac/black tabby chimera with buttercup hued eyes
  ➷ 46 moons old; ages the 18th every month
  ➷ bisexual homoromantic; padding after rattleheart
  ➷ currently mentoring redpaw
  ➷ easy to befriend/interact with ; hard to anger/upset
  ➷ semi-difficult in combat; relies on brute strength, his large size, and endurance
  ➷ "speech", thoughts, attacking
  ➷ peaceful powerplay allowed

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[RATTLEHEART]

The question that leaves Venomstrike's hoarse maw is almost enough to make her laugh, head shaking frantically in an effort to reassure her companion. It had never been him, he had never done anything wrong. It was just her, her anxieties and her guilt and her struggles with her own feelings. She hated to think that he had been blaming himself, her head turning to press her nose lightly into the moor runner's shoulder. "No, don't apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. Never. It was all me, I just... I just..." Her chest was aching, struggling to figure out how exactly she wanted to phrase the words rushing around in her mind. She had been thinking about it all for so long, yet she didn't feel any more prepared for an actual conversation about it all - even though she knew it had to happen. "You didn't do anything. I was avoiding you because... because I felt guilty. I felt horribly guilty over you getting sick because of me. You wouldn't have ended up getting yellowcough if you hadn't constantly been coming to see and take care of me, and I felt terrible about it. I felt like it was better for you if I just... wasn't around. Even though it was hurting me so much to stay away from you." The words spilled out of her in a rush, the dam of emotion blocking out everything in her throat finally breaking apart as she pressed impossibly closer.

Part of her wanted that to just be the end of it. Provide an explanation and an apology, and shove down everything else so that she didn't risk her friendship with Venomstrike. A friendship that meant the world to her, and clearly meant the world to Venomstrike as well - at least, if his actions during the battle were anything to go by. If not for them needing to go, she was sure that Harbingermoon's life would be fully spilled out in the middle of camp, and while some might have been frightened by such devotion, she merely found herself enchanted by it. Venomstrike would do anything for her, and she would do anything for him in return. And she knew that wasn't just an expression of friendship, it was something more than that. A thing that she couldn't just keep hidden inside anymore, even if a coil of fear was still present in her gut.

Her nose moved up from Venomstrike's shoulder to press against his cheek, his fluff practically enveloping her muzzle as she swallowing thickly. "I never wanted to avoid you. I would never, ever want to avoid you, you're everything to me. I love whenever you're around me, I love being able to be alongside you every day, I love every moment we're able to talk to each other." She hesitated momentarily, her claws digging into the soft ground around the barn and shredding the bits of grass that remained beneath her paws. "...I love you, Venomstrike." It comes out soft, and strained, like she's terrified of the rejection that inevitably follow such an admission.
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[ PENNED BY EO ]​