private ...AND I DIGRESS ⊹₊° blazestar

[LUPINESONG]

❀‿ "May I come in? I have a delivery...!" came a mew from outside of the leader's den. A plumy-tailed shadow would enter when given the go-ahead, Lupinepaw padding up to place a thrush before Blazestar, the spoils of a fairly successful — if not absolutely freezing hunting expedition. "Oh, and uhm, Orangeblossom said to tell you that the kits, queens, and elders have all eaten already so... yeah, this is for you, " she dutifully passed along the message with a nod of her head. She supposed it was an assurance to their leader and his more selfless tendencies, the tom seemed to take the whole "feeding his clan before eating himself" rule super seriously even before it was officially stamped into the warrior code.

She would notice then, as her senses thawed from their break from the icy chill of the outside, how much Bobbie's smell pervaded the den. Blazestar sat, still roughened and exhausted from the fox attack he endured some days ago, in a nest built for two. Lupinepaw liked to think of herself as mature. She was smart and well-spoken and super considerate of the feelings of those outside of herself... and so, she was handling her mother's matehood with grace. She would continue to stand proudly behind Bobbie even as she moved on to forge her new life with Blazestar even if her childish reservations clung naggingly to her gut. It was the least she could do for them, knowing they both had experienced more loss than she was capable of fathoming. Kit-like mewlings of "What about our promise to sleep in the warriors' den together?" would remain firmly inside her head.

Even still, a mean, selfish part of Lupinepaw couldn't help but wish that Bobbie had chosen someone else. Someone who didn't have to split his devotion to her with the entirety of Skyclan, who's responsibilities would have to come before her in every single instance. Or someone who didn't force her under the glaring scrutiny of the clan's least charitable members. Lupinepaw had heard the murmurings of favoritism, the questioning of Bobbie's abilities as a lead warrior against her relationship with the ragdoll tom — gossip she would try to stamp out whenever she heard it but persisted around her. She wished her mother would have fallen for someone easier, but that wasn't quite how love worked, right? This was one of the idiosyncrasies of love she couldn't wrap her head around. The lack of control anyone had over their own feelings always bothered her, but perhaps it was one of those things she would learn to appreciate as she got older... or something.

Neither of them could know about her lingering hesitancy, and so neither of them ever would. Besides, it wasn't as if they had any reason to give her more than a passing thought in their lives anyway, so she could shed her worries about her potentially disrupting opinions in peace. Anyways, she had much more to be grateful to Blazestar for than she did to gripe about.

Lupinepaw was aware that it was time to dismiss herself and let the man have his peace, but she lingered near the exit awkwardly. The odd spirit of assertiveness that had gripped her lately wanted to push something off of the tip of her tongue.

NOBODY YET EVERYTHING ⊹₊°❀‿ A POOL TO SHED YOUR MEMORY

• OOC:
• 
• 
  — lupinekit . lupinepaw
  — trans she/her. 8mo apprentice of skyclan
  — tall, long-haired black smoke with low white and green eyes
  — smells like sweet lupine flowers and young pine needles
  — "speech", thoughts, attack
  — icon by antiigone, fullbody by pikaihao and chibi by rae
  — penned by eezy

​

 

[BLAZESTAR]

Blazestar is mildly surprised to hear Lupinepaw’s voice at the mouth of his den. “A delivery? Yes, of course. Come on in.” He settles back in his moss after making a sweeping gesture with his tail—a welcoming one, he hopes. The she-cat who enters is tall, her pelt a gloss of dark, silver-shaded fur, white fur cascading from her throat down to her belly. She’s nothing at all like her mother in appearance, upon first glance, but Blazestar finds that there’s something in the soft green of her eyes, in the fur that streams like stormclouds from either of her cheeks, that mimics the gentle features Bobbie wears. It’s odd to think about, wonders if Bobbie feels the same way when she looks upon Fireflypaw’s broad shoulders and pale fur, upon the soft silky pelt Howlfire wears.

He tries for a smiles, though his body still aches, dull and relentless. Bobbie’s kits have rarely come to visit their mother since she’d moved into the den, but part of him wonders if she’s lingering because she wishes to speak with her. “Bobbie’s on patrol,” he offers, tilting his head. “Unless… was there something you wanted to talk about, Lupinepaw?” He blinks, sensing through Lupinepaw’s dutiful delivery of prey that there’s something else she wants to say.

, ”​

​

 

[LUPINESONG]

❀‿ "Ah, okay, I see! I suppose I'll have to catch Bobbie later..." She nods along, nearly taking her opportunity to exit early, only Blazestar asks her directly if she had anything she wanted to say, and she halts herself, deciding that if she was going to think about it so much she might as well actually do the thing.

She hummed for a moment, attempting to piece together her thoughts before saying suddenly, "She's different, you know."

"Not in a bad way," Lupinepaw amends quickly, "She's more confident, like, in her skills ... and as an individual too." She avoids staring right at the man as she speaks, trying to avoid intimidating herself into speechlessness, "And you have.. recognized her capability too, I know, in trusting her as a Lead Warrior." Surely he recognized some of the scrutiny Bobbie was under? The pressure of public opinion he had thrust upon her in announcing her as a Lead and as his mate nearly simultaneously.

Even still, she could recognize that Blazestar had been more of a positive factor in Bobbie's life than a burden. "She was sad, I think," the observation sounds childish out loud but she says it anyway, "But you helped her in ways others couldn't."

Her eyes glimmered with a near-fierceness, "My mother cares about you, and I can see that you care about her, too, and I... appreciate you for it."

Despite her lingering misgivings, Lupinepaw was grateful. She felt like she was rambling a bit, and so with her tail sweeping upon the dust below her feet Lupinepaw concluded. "I just.. wanted to request that you care for her well, as someone who loves her too. That's all."

NOBODY YET EVERYTHING ⊹₊°❀‿ A POOL TO SHED YOUR MEMORY

• OOC:
• 
• 
  — lupinekit . lupinepaw
  — trans she/her. 9mo apprentice of skyclan. padding after falconpaw
  — a tall, pretty, long-haired black smoke with low white and green eyes
  — smells like sweet lupine flowers and young pine needles
  — "speech", thoughts, attack
  — icon by antiigone, fullbody by pikaihao and chibi by rae
  — penned by eezy

​

 

[BLAZESTAR]

Lupinepaw nearly departs—he can see it in the half-turn of her body, hear it in her voice. But she doesn’t. A hum escapes her throat, before she begins to speak about her mother. She’s different, you know, the smoke-pelted she-cat mews, and Blazestar’s focus sharpens. He sits a little straighter in his nest, nodding for the young she-cat to go on. As she does, a respect begins to build like a pleasant storm in his chest. “Your mother always had the potential to be a fierce and loyal warrior,” he mews, shifting. “And yes, she is different. She found her voice… and we’re all the better for it. Don’t you think?”

Bobbie’s daughter seems to contribute at least some of this change to Blazestar. He isn’t sure if there’s truth in that, but he nods in acknowledgment. “I was sad, too. She… she changed me. She has brought me more joy than I can say, joy that I never thought I would feel again.” He blinks as he speaks the words into existence—every one of them is true, he finds. He reaches for eye contact with Lupinepaw. “I would never intentionally do anything to hurt Bobbie. You have my word.”

, ”​

​