private BUT I'LL MAKE BELIEVE ♥︎ GENTLESTORM

[DOEBLAZE]

It can't have been more than a couple of sunrises since her second litter was apprenticed, but already Bobbie has found herself slipping further into old habits—taking the extra patrol and then heading out after the rest of camp is retiring with the sun for walks, solo hunting, anything that keeps her from sitting still. She'd missed this, she really had, and when she'd told Howlfire she thought it might be good for her it seemed ( thus far, and if grief has taught her one thing, it's not to assume the best ) that had been true. The steady rounds of patrols and work, though she did miss training Blazingpaw, have been as pleasant a constant as the aching in her muscles at the end of each day.

She's out on one of these walks - slash - hunts when she sees him; they'd met before on the border, in the brief span of time between the journey's end and her pregnancy. Between his loss and hers. What she remembers, though, when she sees Gentlestorm, as she'd heard from one of the Gathering - returning warriors, is not whatever simple chatter she'd so easily let flow last they met. It's what she'd said in the mountains, with Little Wolf buried under how many pawfuls of snow: " I can't imagine losing someone like that. "

Well, she certainly can now.

" Gentlestorm . . . ? " the warrior calls to the snowy - furred figure poking through the plants on the other side of the border in the purple - streaked dusk. She must've given him quite the shock, the tabby reflects later; last they'd met, she'd been stressed but cheerful, her biggest sorrow snapping at Lupinesong, her second litter yet unborn and still with the promise of a father. Since then—well, since then, he surely knows what has happened, though she can't recall if she'd ever properly told him about her and Blazestar.

She must make quite a sight, then ( no wonder half the Clan is always prodding at her to eat ); grief has torn far more weight than she could afford off her small frame, her fur's still a touch disheveled despite her half - hearted efforts—she keeps forgetting to wash it after the day's work—and, well . . . half her face is relatively destroyed. Bobbie winces at the recollection ( she's been generally avoiding puddles ) and adds quietly, " It is you. "

// @GENTLESTORM !!

" speech "

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[GENTLESTORM]

.𓍊↟ DOWN THE BANK WHERE THE DOGS ROAM, POR LA CALLE QUE TE LLEVA A CURICÓ ↟𓍊.​

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. — The greenleaf heat isn't anything that he particularly enjoys in the least but he resumes with his day and pushes onward through the thick foliage, it provides him comfort despite the way that he stuck out amongst all the greenery. Both of his ears angling forward as he keeps an eye out for any herbs that he could end up stumbling upon even if Raccoonstripe had set him out on a patrol there wasn't any harm in going on another one. He'd need all the herbs necessary when leaf-bare rolled around and brought forth the cold as well as illnesses, he didn't want any of his clanmates to succumb to disease again. It reminds him of the plague that had spread throughout the clans and its enough to make the mass of fur shudder at the mere memory of it. The sound of pawsteps cause him to stop and he doesn't realize how close he had gotten to Skyclan's border.

He inwardly winces at the thought of running into Dawnglare again after the other had completed his training already and he's prepared to retreat until a different voice calls his name. Gentlestorm turns to see the fawn freckled warrior that he hasn't seen in several moons, he stops in his tracks, and he immediately takes in the sight of her noting her marred appearance and the lack of an eye. "Bobbie..." The medicine cat pauses only to take some steps forward still processing the individual that stood across the border, a frown parting on his maw and pulling down at the sides of his mouth. She looked awful even if he would never admit this outloud and his ears flick back for a moment as she speaks again confirming that it is, in fact, him. "And it's you." He murmurs quietly only to glance over his shoulder to make sure there wasn't a patrol approaching and fixed his gaze onto her once more.

Her marred appearance wasn't the only thing he had taken note of but how thin she seemed and how her coat seemed disheveled. After a few heartbeats, he settles down onto his haunches and speaks with a dry chuckle slipping from his throat "I suppose that we've seen better days." Gentlestorm had his days and nights where he struggled to sleep or get up from his nest especially with the empty spot next to him every morning. All he could do is focus on his duty, gather herbs, take care of his clanmates, and spend some time with his loved ones even if it still stings. On rarer occasions, he gives himself a pause from all the work that he gives himself to break away and bring flowers to the makeshift grave of his mate and the neighboring ones that belonged to his friends. Much like Bobbie, he simply dives into his own work and forgets about basic neccessities like food or water.

"How's everything? How... How are you?" He asks finally turning his golden gaze in her direction, it seems that she's on her own as well and it makes him realize how alike they are in that aspect. The loss of Little Wolf had occurred early on yet with Bobbie, she had a few moons to bask in the glow and love of her mate before his flame had been snuffed out. Would he be just as damaged as Bobbie if that had been for him? He isn't certain but he knows that it isn't a thought he wants to linger on.

⡠﹞AND DOWN BY THE BEACH ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. WHERE NO OTHERS CAN FIND﹝⠢

• 

  MEDICINE CAT IN TRAINING;
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ FLESH WOUNDS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ INFECTIONS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ ACHES & PAINS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀❀ ILLNESS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀❀ BREATHING ISSUES
  — ✿❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀ TRAVELING HERBS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ BROKEN BONES
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ KITTING
  — ❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀ POISONS
• 
  ✿ a longhaired blue sepia tom w/low white and brown eyes
  ✿ gentlestorm is a very warm individual and friendly to those who he meets, he's very social and willing to lend anyone a paw if they need it. he's very patient, caring, and it's usually rare to earn his ire.
  ✿ 56 moons old; ages the 27th every month
  ✿ demiromantic bisexual ; widowed mate of little wolf
  ✿ easy to befriend/interact with ; hard to anger/upset ; peaceful powerplay allowed
  ✿ "speech", thoughts, attacking

​

 

[DOEBLAZE]

" It is, " The reply comes in a low, rasping murmur, drawn forced from her throat as if hooked claws from flesh. A low and husky tone that speaks to hundreds, thousands of shed tears, it seems an appropriate accompaniment to the split mask of her face. One half remains forcibly impassive, the other made so through effort, a heavy - lidded green eye taking in the downward pull of a white muzzle and backwards flick of pale - tipped ears. It affirms what she has already known—that she looks as awful as she feels; that Harrierstripe's claws had rent her flesh and soul, effortlessly ravaged her face and destroyed her heart in the matter of a few moments.

" That bad, huh? " Hospital humor colors a rueful voice as her own tattered ears twitch; there's a strange kinship between the two of them now, although perhaps she only imagines it. She mirrors him when she settles down onto weary paws, eliciting a soft oof and a grimace at the old - wood creak of her protesting joints, still unused to so much motion. " You don't have to be polite—I've seen better days, " she manages in a voice feather - soft with exhaustion, one long layered and built in oil brushstrokes on a canvas once so stark and clean.

" Oh, you know, " she sighs out with tired familiarity, glancing up at him with a grief - dark green eye and then away towards the horizon, wind feathering tattered fur around her cheeks. " Managing. I . . . I stepped down from SkyClan's council, " she admits, giving voice to her failures, back molars gritting so hard she thinks they might shatter. " It's been hard, I guess, but I know you know that. I'll be fine eventually. "

" You seem to be, " the tabby murmurs, a wavering bloom of envy coloring her voice for his perceived return to normalcy. That darkened eye slides back towards him, some low ember of pleading glowing in its depths. Her thoughts go unspoken: How? How did you do it? What did you do that I can't seem to?

" speech "

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[GENTLESTORM]

.𓍊↟ DOWN THE BANK WHERE THE DOGS ROAM, POR LA CALLE QUE TE LLEVA A CURICÓ ↟𓍊.​

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. — Her voice is different from when he had first met her and the way it had been light with so much life to give yet here, he can practically hear the nights that she spent sobbing herself asleep in her voice. It makes his own throat tighten up in the slightest knowing that she hurts just as bad as he had yet he can't help but envy her in the slightest. She had gotten time with Blazestar and she had gotten to return from the mountains to the golden embrace of the kittypet king. Gentlestorm had gotten neither of those things but a cold nest across from his own and the emptiness in his chest, he drowned in his sorrow while Bobbie had been curled up with Blazestar and if it hadn't been for Berryheart stepping forward to give him a purpose... A chance at something more, well, he doesn't know where he would be.

"I'm afraid that being polite is a bad habit of mine," The tom offers dryly though there's faint amusement laced in his words and his copper gaze focuses onto the lone verdant pool that pops out against lilac curls. "And I'm sorry for your loss..." He adds on carefully knowing the pain of losing a mate firsthand and his whiskers twitch in the slightest, he pauses for a few heartbeats as large, shaggy paws shuffle in the slightest and moves about the leaves that were scattered on the forest floor. He finds that talking to Bobbie despite everything is still refreshing and he can recall the time they had nearly got spotted by a large wild cat, Gentlestorm can remember feeling frustration embedded within him while talking to the doe-like molly. It's different now that they mirror one another and have an odd kinship, this he can agree on silently.

She mentions speaking down from the Skyclan council and continues about how it's been hard that she'll be fine eventually, he offers a nod of his helm. "You seem to be." She says and it makes the large tom tense up in the slightest as his eyes narrow taking her in as he listens to her. "I have to be or at least... try to be fine." Gentlestorm let's out a dry chuckle, a shake of his head, and casts his gaze to the skies as he clears his throat so it isn't cracking with emotion as he continues, "With my position, I can't allow myself to wallow in sorrow. I need to be attentive and prepared for whatever is flung my way. Every clanmate, injury, and illness. I can't falter." The snowy tom fixes his attention onto the former lead warrior once more and offers a faint sad smile.

"I don't have the greatest coping mechanisms... I drown myself in my own work to get by," A large paw digs and pushes the soil until its a small mound near snowy dipped toes, he hesitates for a moment or two knowing that he got to speak with their ancestors. He got a chance to see Little Wolf whenever he visits the moonstone and closes his eyes to dream but it isn't always guaranteed as much as he wishes or hopes. As selfish as he wants to be... His clan would come before his wants or needs. "But... I try and when I do. I'm reminded of all the cats that care about me and I care for them deeply." He thinks about Batwing and Leopardtongue's kits, how they meant the world to him, Doepaw, Nightbird, and so many other cats.

Flamewhisker had also asked how he could do it and the way Bobbie's lone eye has the faint glow of pleading, it reminds him a lot of the orange tabbied deputy that rests within the nursery. A sadness washes over him and it bleeds into his dark honeyed gaze, his ears pressing flat against his skull before he closes his eyes to let out a soft breath. "How...how do you keep going?" Gentlestorm could remember that night clearly when she asked him this and his eyes reopen the next moment, a sigh slipping from his jaws and he speaks "It's never easy at first but wounds heal in due time. The heart just takes longer and there's no herb that can speed up the process." A dry chuckle tumbles out from his throat, "Trust me... I know..."

⡠﹞AND DOWN BY THE BEACH ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. WHERE NO OTHERS CAN FIND﹝⠢

• 

  MEDICINE CAT IN TRAINING;
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ FLESH WOUNDS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ INFECTIONS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ ACHES & PAINS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀❀ ILLNESS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀❀ BREATHING ISSUES
  — ✿❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀ TRAVELING HERBS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ BROKEN BONES
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ KITTING
  — ❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀ POISONS
• 
  ✿ a longhaired blue sepia tom w/low white and brown eyes
  ✿ gentlestorm is a very warm individual and friendly to those who he meets, he's very social and willing to lend anyone a paw if they need it. he's very patient, caring, and it's usually rare to earn his ire.
  ✿ 56 moons old; ages the 27th every month
  ✿ demiromantic bisexual ; widowed mate of little wolf
  ✿ easy to befriend/interact with ; hard to anger/upset ; peaceful powerplay allowed
  ✿ "speech", thoughts, attacking

​

 

[DOEBLAZE]

" And mine, " the tabby concedes with a wry tilt of the head, thoroughly shredded ears flicking with all the frantic motion of a deer's. A lone viridescent eye, remarkable less for its color than the deep lines of exhaustion carved beneath it, flicks towards cooled copper. " Polite to a fault, the both of us, " she adds, voice dry and achingly rueful, half a recollection of better days . . . last they'd spoken, she had been that much twitchier, that much more anxious, that much sweeter, pointlessly kind words spilling out of her maw like the overflowing river of their mountain journey. She's shed herself like antler velvet, a transformation marked in blood . . . words are weighted carefully now, tone level, but the husky rasp it carries speaks to everything lost for this slight gain.

" Thank you. " A shortened tail flicks behind her, a tangled lump of fur more white than lilac now, kicking up sundried dust around her pale paws. It calls to mind the swishing white flag of a deer's tail, marking an escape into some distant place, though rarely has she been able to outrun anything, it seems. There's a pause as lead - weighted as her shoulders, both of them seeping in the same memory ( albeit unknowingly ). She can recall the musty scent of the great cat, the vicious heavy thumps of its huge paws . . . but what she mostly remembers is her own words, and it's all she can do not to let her face crumple in shame at the memory. How naive . . . how stupid she had been, then, with her soft - voiced placations and reassurances, not yet touched by her own grief. Finally she breaks it, voice a beaten - down rasp, " And I yours. "

A watchful verdant eye studies his face, one as shaggy - furred and creased with exhaustion as her own, and her heart softens despite herself. How many cats does she know that share this experience? Precious few, and how many have the mutual connection of their former mates that she can claim to share with Gentlestorm? Only the pale - furred cat before her. He puts a voice to his own struggle, and she almost envies it . . . envies the way he'd refused to wallow, to drown in his grief as she had—though crushing it with work is an experience she can thus far relate to. Cats that care about him, huh? She has six children, five quickly slipping away from her paws, from claws she hadn't realized were bared, one already lost ( or so it would seem ).

" You're a stronger cat than me. I certainly wallowed . . . I almost wish I hadn't been in the nursery, but . . . " she trails off, helplessly spreading one scruffy white paw. " If I hadn't . . . wallowed, I don't know what would have happened, " the tabby mutters darkly, his final words of advice jolting her from her own reverie. " Stars, I'm saying too much . . . " Bobbie sighs, paws kneading at the dewy grass on her own side of the border. He certainly doesn't want to hear about her personal issues—he's a medicine cat, for StarClan's sake, she's certain he already gets more than enough of that. She simply remarks, husky voice tinged with half - concealed sorrow, " Yeah? I hope I get there one day. "

OOC : —

♥︎

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