pafp COMPLETE LIST OF FEARS [sorting feathers]

[FALCONHEART]

𓍊𓋼 The past few days have been rough. Tiring, disorienting, lonesome. He hasn’t slept much for the guilt that’s been eating at him, and his usual daily visits to the nursery have been much more brief than they were in the past. Facing his mother—facing anyone—has become a task that he simply can’t find much energy for. For the past few months, he’s been trying to be there for his kin in the nursery, trying to be a suitable replacement for his father… but it’s always been a useless endeavor, hasn’t it? No matter how hard he tries, he’ll never even begin to live up to the legacy that Flycatcher left behind. He’ll never truly compare to his father, and now he’s managed to do nothing except anger a majority of the clan.

He thought he was doing the right thing. He thought that if he needed to, he could break the code just once and everything woukd turn out fine. He still doesn’t know exactly why he agreed; was it because Raccoonstripe had suggested it? Was it truly because he worried about his family starving? Or did he only go through with it because he thought he could get away with it? That no one would notice, perhaps?

He blinks as a shuffle of movement nearby catches his eye, and raises his head to catch sight of Gentlestorm moving past. Pale paws freeze for a moment in their movements—sifting through an assortment of collected feathers, in search of the softest ones to line the nests in the nursery. He plucks one from the bunch and sets it aside in particular. It’s nothing special, but it’s silky soft, so one of the queens will surely love having it in their nest. After a few heartbeats of silence, Falconheart greets, "Hi, Gentlestorm. How are you doing? Want one?" His words are quiet and sheepish, voice scratching slightly against his throat as he speaks. The medicine cat had been extremely unhappy with Raccoonstripe’s plan, and Falconheart fears what he might have to say about it now. He’s still angry, certainly, but Falconheart has grown used to others being angry with him. He can handle it.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 take the world by storm

• ooc: @GENTLESTORM
• 
  FALCONHEART ❯❯ he/him, thunderclan warrior
  ⭃ shorter than average cream tabby with white spotting. seems gloomy and has few friends, but is a hard worker and never neglects his duties.
  ⭃ son of flamewhisker and flycatcher ; brother to stormfeather, scorchedkit, mothkit, sunkit, squirrelkit, sparrowpaw
  ⭃ peaceful and healing powerplay permitted
  ⭃ penned by foxlore

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[GENTLESTORM]

.𓍊↟ DOWN THE BANK WHERE THE DOGS ROAM POR LA CALLE QUE TE LLEVA A CURICÓ ↟𓍊.​

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. — The whole fiasco brought him frustration and the fact it was done after Skyclan had so kindly let Dawnglare come to Thunderclan to finish his training. Not only did they steal from the clan they had the closest relationship with but they had the nerve to get into a scuffle as well and two of their clanmates had gotten injured. The patrol had broken the warrior code that had been put together by the leaders of the clans and had practically spat on it, the thought alone makes the fur on his pelt prickle in the slightest. His ears pressed flat against his skull though his head lifts when Falconheart speaks to him and he can see the other sifting through a few feathers. The warrior asks if he wants one and Gentlestorm feels a frown beginning to tug at the sides of his mouth downwards, he tries to think of what to say at first but he bites his tongue mulling over a few of his thoughts before pushing them away.

"No, I don't want one." The pale tomcat begins feeling his bushy eyebrows knot together in frustration and his jaw clenches, he's irritated at the entire patrol and Falconheart had gone willingly even if it had been for a good cause to feed their clan but they still had broken the warrior code. "I'm disappointed, Falconheart... Not just in you but everyone who went on that patrol," There's a brief pause knowing that any of the cata from that patrol could overhear him and likely get angry with him but at the given moment, he doesn't care. "We're meant to follow the warrior code and be role models for the younger cats of Thunderclan... Is this the example you wish to set?" The large tom says at last.

⡠﹞AND DOWN BY THE BEACH ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. WHERE NO OTHERS CAN FIND﹝⠢

• 

  MEDICINE CAT IN TRAINING;
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ FLESH WOUNDS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ INFECTIONS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ ACHES & PAINS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀❀ ILLNESS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀❀ BREATHING ISSUES
  — ✿❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀ TRAVELING HERBS
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿❀❀❀ BROKEN BONES
  — ✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿ KITTING
  — ❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀ POISONS
• 
  ✿ a longhaired blue sepia tom w/low white and brown eyes
  ✿ gentlestorm is a very warm individual and friendly to those who he meets, he's very social and willing to lend anyone a paw if they need it. he's very patient, caring, and it's usually rare to earn his ire.
  ✿ 56 moons old; ages the 27th every month
  ✿ demiromantic bisexual ; widowed mate of little wolf
  ✿ easy to befriend/interact with ; hard to anger/upset ; peaceful powerplay allowed
  ✿ "speech", thoughts, attacking

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[STAGSNARL.]

YOU ALWAYS SAID HOW YOU LIKE DOGS​

---

there is a moment, though it is quick and extremely fleeting, that they regret not going on that patrol. a raid of sorts. they know its wrong. the code is there for a reason and for the most part they follow it. why? because their parents tell them to. their mentor tells them to. howlingstar tells them to. its easy and simple like that. they do as they're told. they always have. there is a class of order here and they're so desperate for a inkling of praise or recognition that they're doing the right thing that it's so easy for them to follow the code.

as gentlestorm states that he's disappointed in falconheart, and everyone else on that patrol, she's more glad now that she didn't go. other than the obvious reasons, something tells her that she would have just been pissed the entire time. she doesn't hunt well and it would have been a waste of her time to go there. and besides, she thinks, if gentlestorm had told her that he was disappointed in her, she might have broken. it is not nearly as powerful as it would have been coming from her parents, or coming from houndpaw– wait what? no! she doesn't care about what the fuck houndpaw thinks! a silent snort leaves her and she only quietly speaks out loud.

"the code does exist for a reason. every cat knows that. tch."

they don't think they're loud enough to even really be heard. doesn't matter either way. they need to go train.

//in and out !

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[FALCONHEART]

𓍊𓋼 He can’t handle it, actually.

Gentlestorm turns a withering look upon him, and Falconheart’s hopes crumble before his eyes. Pale paws still immediately upon the feathers, and his tail flickers once, uncomfortably. He feels pinned in place under the medicine cat’s stare. As expected, the older tom refuses his offer, and Falconheart hardly manages a nod. He understands. Really, he does. But is it really necessary, he wonders, when Gentlestorm continues to talk? Disappointed, he says, and that’s always been a worse feeling than anger to the cream tabby tom. All he’s ever wanted is to make his clanmates proud of him, and it seems that in trying to do that, he’s messed it all up—he tends to do that, doesn’t he? But beating himself up about things that he can’t change doesn’t get him any closer to greatness, does it?

Is this the example you wish to set? "I’m—I didn’t…" He shakes his head, shoulders slumping. He doesn’t know what to say, because every time he thinks of the example he’s been setting, he wants to crawl into a hole in the ground and never leave. Stagpaw’s biting comment goes largely ignored in favor of shooting Gentlestorm an openly hurt look—wouldn’t he do the same thing if he had to? The code is important, and breaking it is unforgivable, but surely they have to put themselves first sometime, don’t they? Anger rises in his chest for the briefest of moments, but bubbles back down to shame after a single heartbeat. "I understand…" he sighs, his tail curling tightly against his haunch. Claws flex and retract repeatedly, over and over and over.

"I’m sorry," he says, finally. The words are clipped, heavy and sharp with regret. "Of course it’s not the—the example I want to set. I shouldn’t have… shouldn’t have done it. I know. I should have just… just followed the code." I should have been a good warrior. I should have done what Flycatcher would have done.

𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 take the world by storm

• ooc: —
• 
  FALCONHEART ❯❯ he/him, thunderclan warrior
  ⭃ shorter than average cream tabby with white spotting. seems gloomy and has few friends, but is a hard worker and never neglects his duties.
  ⭃ son of flamewhisker and flycatcher ; brother to stormfeather, scorchedkit, mothkit, sunkit, squirrelkit, sparrowpaw
  ⭃ peaceful and healing powerplay permitted
  ⭃ penned by foxlore

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