dawn chorus - howling

[Flycatcher]

He stands before the leaders den for a long time, indecision about coming to speak with the ThunderClan matriarch weighing heavily in his mind. Flycatcher had been troubled by his thoughts as of late and there was something he needed to discuss with her, he just wasn't sure if he had the courage to speak. Would Howlingstar be disappointed in him if he said what had been weighing on his mind? Would she disregard his fears and tell him to remain strong and that the clan needed him? Well, the clan could still have him, just perhaps in other ways.

Flycatcher draws in a deep breath, cool air tickling his throat. "Howlingstar, may I come in?" Flycatcher called out. He would wait for a response before slipping inside, bobbing his head at the brown tabby in greeting. "Sorry, if you were resting, there was something I hoped to discuss with you," He mewed. Flycatcher hesitated a moment, looking suddenly very nervous. He had to fight to push those nerves back. knowing he was making the situation seem worse than it truly was with his odd behaviour. "It's about my role as deputy."

@HOWLINGSTAR ​

 

[HOWLINGSTAR]

Howlingstar has settled down after her meal, hoping to warm up from the biting cold in the safety of her den. As she nestles into her nest to try and get comfortable, her deputy's voice floats into the den. "Flycatcher? Come on in," She mews back, pricking her ears as she watches the blue tabby enter. He looked...unsure, hesitant. Concern clouds her gaze as she tilts her head and gets to her paws to pad closer. "Is something the matter?"

It's about my role as deputy.

She blinks in surprise, wondering what he could possibly want to talk about involving his rank. Does he want more duties? Less? Clarification on something his job entails? "Of course - what is it?" She probes further, trying her best to keep a level tone as she stares at him. Her eyes search his own, trying her best to read him, to predict what he might be trying to ask her - tell her. The way nervousness drips from his twitching whiskers and shuffling paws has her on edge; what could he possibly be wanting to discuss that has him so on edge?​

 

[Flycatcher]

As he stands there quietly, he is aware of Howlingstar's gaze drifting over him, searching his features for some sort of clue to his issues no doubt. Flycatcher takes a moment to settle his nerves further before he dares speak again. "I wish to step down as deputy of ThunderClan," He announces suddenly. The air feels heavy with the weight of what he had just said but strangely he feels relieved. Quite frankly, it was nice to get it off his chest.

"Howlingstar, I have been honoured to serve you as deputy these past few moons, and even more honoured that you chose me," Flycatcher mews. He could still remember coming in here after she had announced him as deputy, shock and doubt in his mind, wanting to know why she had chosen him above all else. "In time, I would have been honoured to succeed you and continue your great legacy. But I cannot do it anymore, try as I might I don't think I'm strong enough. These past few moons have been incredibly hard for me and my family and during these difficulties, it has given me much time to reflect. I no longer think I can shoulder the responsibilities of being deputy. I still want to help ThunderClan, of course, and be a loyal and dependable warrior but I don't think I can handle the responsibilities anymore."​

 

[HOWLINGSTAR]

She isn't really sure what she had been expecting, but it certainly wasn't this. Her shoulders stiffen in surprise, eyes widening just a bit as they bore into him. She'd never anticipated something like this, not in a thousand moons. When she thinks of ThunderClan after she joins StarClan, she thinks of them led by the friend that sits before her, lives and new name granted by their starry clanmates. That's why she'd named him her successor. And she wonders if something was wrong...if she'd done something wrong.

But he goes on to tell her it's been an honor, and she feels emotion well up in her throat. She listens to him give his reasons and all she can do is nod slowly in understanding. She gets it. She does. Sunfreckle had told her something similar lately, wanting less crushing responsibility and more time with his kin, more time to enjoy his life as a warrior. "I understand," She mews softly, her voice heavy because, yes, this decision does sadden her. But she understands, above all. She remembers a younger Flycatcher, freshly named deputy and worried and nervous, and she can see how much he's grown from that cat. He is now a warrior with more confidence, one who is more sure in every decision he makes, and she knows he will still continue to be a credit to ThunderClan even if he is no longer the future leader of the clan. Her expression softens and she tilts her head slightly.

"Thank you, Flycatcher, for everything you've done for me, for ThunderClan. I'm honored to have served our clan with you by my side for so long. Won't you remain on my council? Just as a lead warrior?" She hopes, prays, he says yes...she isn't sure how easily she can handle losing yet another trusted voice so soon.​

 

[Flycatcher]

In his mind, he anticipates her reaction to be worse than what it is, even though deep down he knows her not to be like that. When she does respond, Howlingstar's voice is heavy with emotion, but she accepts his decision. The blue tom breathes a sigh of relief. "Thank you," He finally chokes out, his own voice strained with emotion. It had taken a lot for him to consider this, let alone come and speak with Howlingstar about it, he is just glad to have his decision accepted.

Flycatcher had expected just to become a lowly warrior again, so he is surprised when Howlingstar asks him to remain as a lead warrior. "A lead warrior?" He echoes, his green eyes widening to show his shock. He considers his options for a moment before nodding. "I will be glad to continue serving on your council, Howlingstar."​

 

[HOWLINGSTAR]

Her expression softens, and she nods. "That is all I could ask of you," She utters warmly, moving to touch her tail-tip to his shoulder in a show of gratitude. She doesn't know what leading a clan will be like without him by her side, but she knows the adjustment will be easier if she doesn't have to say goodbye to his advice forever. Smiling, she leans back and murmurs, "Go get some sleep. I will tell the clan in the morning."

Her mind is already whirring, despite the exhaustion that hangs from her whiskers. Stars...who will replace him? There are many cats she trusts in the clan, many that are young and strong and ready to bear the burden she must place on them. To choose who would be the best fit for ThunderClan's next leader will be her next impossible task.​