pafp FEEL SO FUNNY THESE DAYS — sad

[DARKWHISKER]

the morning is quiet, snow falling with a gentleness unlike the past few days. it dusts the dark fur of the boy who sits outside of the recently dug out apprentices' den. uncharacteristic of darkpaw to wear a frown; he always tries to look on the bright side, all that he's ever wanted was to be a beacon of hope for his clanmates. to spread happiness... but hope had been spit back into his face, and now he dons a swathe of marigold and cobwebs along the bridge of his nose.

misty eyes stare, unblinking, at the pebble which sits at his paws. windclan had attacked skyclan in their own forest... and starclan hadn't lifted a paw to help. why? why didn't they do anything to stop it? why did they let innocent blood be shed? why did they let his own blood be spilled onto the snow? in the naive mind of a child, it doesn't seem fair. darkpaw hadn't even lifted a claw against the other apprentice, instead he'd tried to talk them out of fighting. but they attacked him anyway. and...

the boy chokes back a sob as he imagines the tortoiseshell's own blood on his unsheathed claws. he'd hurt her back. in the heat of the moment, in the middle of all the fear and pain and frustration at not being listened to, he'd done the one thing he swore to never do. hot tears slip past the surface, droplets darkening the snow. why, why, why?

pawsteps break darkpaw out of his thoughts, swallowing a hiccup as he turns to face mudpelt. his gaze rakes over his dad's face, trying to find any hint of disappointment on the warrior's features... but his dad looks the same as ever; kind. darkpaw wanted to be kind, too, but how could he be after hurting someone?

"i'm sorry," darkpaw croaks, wiping at his face with a paw to try and dry some of those shameful tears. and he doesn't know what he's truly apologizing for; failing to stop the fight? hurting another cat? being anything other than happy, allowing his soul to be muddied with all of this negativity? whatever it is, he feels the need to repent.

[ takes place right before the flood; please wait for @MUDPELT ! ]​

 

[MUDPELT]

Darkpaw's dejected mood had been obvious to the tom all day. He watches him from across camp, brow creased with concern. He thinks about seeking out Icesparkle to ask if she knows anything about what has him so down. But then he spots the first tears roll down his son's face and he can't sit idly by any longer. He gets to his paws and strides across their little island camp, a worried frown pulling at his maw.

As he arrives at the boy's side, however, he strives to yank an encouraging smile onto his muzzle. But after hearing Darkpaw's apology, it falters and confusion flashes across his features. "Why are you sorry?" His head tilts, clearly not understanding what his kit could be talking about. He thinks, and thinks, but truthfully the warrior has never been good at guessing this sort of think. Amber eyes settle on the poultice that patches up his nose, and he cautiously mews, "Is it your muzzle? Don't worry about that, Beesong's great! I'm sure it won't scar! And if it does, you'll be the fiercest-looking apprentice here!" ​

 

[iciclefang]

Her brother has been so quiet since RiverClan had gone to help SkyClan, since he'd returned with that wound laid sharp across his nose. She's mystified by his response -- in comparison, she's glowing with confidence after the battle, with satisfaction that she can rely on her own abilities to defend what RiverClan thinks is right.

Darkpaw, though, is not like her. He's the type to think all the Clans should be friends. His innocence is endearing to her, but at times it can be a bit much. He and Fernpaw are too alike in some ways, she thinks. Toms...

Speaking of. Her father approaches Darkpaw, who's crying, his tears darkening the frost beneath him. Crying... and apologizing. Mudpelt doesn't understand what's wrong with Darkpaw, either, which is somewhat relieving. Iciclepaw approaches her brother and bumps her forehead against his shoulder.

"Whatever it is, it's okay," she mews, blinking at him. "You can tell us." She might not understand even if he spills his guts, but she will try -- for him.​

[ PENNED BY MARQUETTE ]​

​

 

[Chirping Bird]

NOTHING LIKE HOME​

---

The elder had watched many ups and downs. Within the clan, the cats around her, and in herself. She had seen sorrow and rage. Sadness and joy. But it never got easier to hear another cry. Her heart ached with the apprentice to see them in such a state. Chirping Bird cared very deeply for every Riverclanner. No matter their mistakes. She would always try to put some of the burden onto herself.

“Yes, listen to your kin and your clanmates.” the orange and white feline said as she came across the scene. “I forgive you, whatever it is. But I am curious about what you are sorry about.” she says smoothly. Trying to comfort the young feline. Having nothing but a kind face for Darkpaw. ​

 

[DARKWHISKER]

it's not just mudpelt that comes to his side, but iciclepaw and chirping bird as well. his sister bumps her head against his trembling shoulder, and darkpaw leans into the touch with a hiccup. how lucky is he to have clanmates like them? he sees no harsh judgment in their eyes, no sharp disapproval for his mistakes. all he sees is that overwhelming kindness that he desperately wishes to possess for himself.

mudpelt, puzzled, asks if it's because of the claw marks laid upon a dark chocolate nose bridge. darkpaw huffs out a humorless laugh at his father's attempt to cheer him up; he appreciates the gesture, he really does. and he wishes his worries were as vain as stressing over his appearance. "i- it's not that, i just..." darkpaw's brow knits and his lips purse as he thinks, long and hard. "i couldn't... stop the fighting. i- i hurt someone. i was so upset because they didn't even try to listen... they only wanted to fight." the apprentice hangs his head, guilt and shame returning to his burning cheeks. more tears brim at the surface, falling down onto his paws.

and there's that question again, haunting him like a ghost in the back of his mind. this time, he finds it creeping up on his tongue. "...why didn't... starclan stop the fighting?"

[ pretend this reply isn't 2 weeks late <3 ]​