sensitive topics i cant be still ..

[BASILWHISKER]

⋆⍋ .. tw: overstimulation, internal panic attack, spiraling thoughts

A warm rain had greeted ThunderClan that morning. It was light, pattering gently against the ferns and shrubs that lined the sandy clearing. Basilpaw had climbed out from underneath the ferns to find a better cover, not liking how heavy the rain was making his pelt feel. The creeping sensation of the water reaching below his fur and to his skin made him struggle to hold in a shudder, his jaw tight as his gaze focused purely on somewhere to duck under and minimize the feeling. As horribly as it sounded, Basilpaw saw the elders den as his best option. The fallen tree had the least amount of little patches or holes to let the rain seep through.

His paws led him straight for it, without hesitation crawling into the tree and standing between some occupied nests. The scent of the old cats made his nose twitch, trying not to focus on how stale the air was. Some water dripped from his whiskers and onto one of the sleeping elders he was lingering over, causing them to raise their head and growl at him to buzz off. Basilpaw swallowed the words he wanted to lash at them and stepped away, only to be barked at once again. Unless you're here with something to do, get out of here! He could hear the rain getting worse outside.

I don't want to. Basilpaw wanted to retort back. He knew better than to go too far in irritating their kind. The type to cry to the warriors for him not obeying their every hacking order. Wordlessly he backed away and nearly flinched at the rain rushing to meet him. An intense sun shower now. He began to grow overwhelmed with how quickly the water soaked into his fur all over, in less than a few breaths his coat felt heavier than before.

Basilpaw's eyes darted around to find somewhere else to go. The nursery would surely get him in trouble, getting the queens and kittens wet would only bring more complaints. The medicine den? He wasn't so sure how tolerant Berryheart would be of his needless lingering. The warriors wouldn't entertain him for more than a second. No, the solution wasn't in here. His sights set for the brambles at the entrance, and at once Basilpaw was gone and out of camp. Ignoring the voice of questions or confusion as she shoved himself past the brambles and into the trees, the pointed apprentice took off to find somewhere dry. Somewhere quiet. No overwhelming scents or sounds, and he can dry off and wait for the rain to pass.

His head hung low while his eyes skimmed every inch he ran past, not paying much attention to where his paws were leading him. He landed himself into a small pit of mud- a gurgled splash as his paws made impact. Basilpaw froze, his jaw so tight his teeth were biting into his tongue. He remained still, but inside he felt his heart racing faster than a horse. Clouds raged in his chest like a storm on its own. He felt stuck. Stuck in his own head as he simmered in his state. Mud sinking into his ankles, the rain still pelting down on him and not leaving a single whisker of him dry. The droplets that dripped from his ears, down to his trembling muzzle and to his whiskers. The sensations were too much, but he couldn't escape, something wasn't letting him continue. ​

 

[Lionthroat]

Had it not been for clan duties, Lionthroat could sit and watch the rain pour for hours. The strong scent of dew and the soft pitter patter of droplets splashing against the earth usually filled him with a sense of serenity, a calmness he certainly didn't achieve in his day to day activities. Watching a morning storm was whimsical, however hunting in it was different story entirely. The smell of rain often drowned out the scent of prey, and the water clung so heavy to his pelt he felt like he was dragging a second cat with him every step of the way. The last thing he needed was a storm to remind him how poor of a hunter he was.

Lionthroat twitches the accumulation of water pooling along his whiskers away, walking lamely along the mud slick path with a measly mouse clutched between his fangs. He was lucky to befall the little sucker when he did, but he paid the price in water and mud. At least he could bring back something. He's about to pass through the bramble entrance when the sound of rising voices catch his attention, was the camp under attack? Lionthroat barely finishes his forethought when a figure charges past, nearly knocking him off kilter and sending his precious mouse into the mud.

He could feel his lips quiver with an angry shout, but the irritation dissipates once he notices how distressed his clanmate looked. Something was clearly amiss here, it worried Lionthroat to find out what that was.

Abandoning his mouse to the muck Lionthroat trails after Basilpaw in a quickened pace, losing his scent once or twice to the heavy smells of wet grass and rain. Eventually though he catches up and finds the apprentice shaking in a pool of mud, "Hey! Are you alright?" he asks, cautiously approaching Basilpaw with tedious paw steps. "The trails can be a little slippery in the rain, are you able to move at all?"

"speech"​

​

 

[nightbird]

out before the rain had began, it didn't take long for the soft morning drizzle to turn angry. her pelt hung tightly to her form as water dripped from it. no matter how much she shook it free the wetness had seeped into her skin. on the return to camp nightbird's pawsteps were heavy. there was no use in treading quietly when all the prey was already in hiding, scent trails washed clean from the undergrowth.

the only proof of her efforts was a squirrel hanging from her jaws, the extra weight from the water that held to it made her bones ache. as she neared camp, voices broke through the monotonous sounds of the storm, thunderclanners, but who was out in this weather? grey gaze narrowed as she changed her trajectory, slinging the damp squirrel across her shoulders.

lionthroat tentatively moved towards a shaken basilpaw, her brow quirked in question as she exchanged a glance with the other warrior. it wasn't often that apprentice's snuck from camp to just stand in a puddle of mud. "what are you two doing out here? back to camp, before you get yourselves sick," nightbird says, voice nowhere near the level of caution or gentleness as the flame pointed warrior beside her. a thin soaked tail twitched behind her impatiently. whatever was happening could be dealt with under the cover of a den. with no signs of the weather holding up, it did not need to be discussed outside.​

 

[LICHENPAW ❁]

————— ❁ —————
I AM JUST A BROKEN MACHINE

Lichenpaw is quick to follow when he sees his brother dashing out of camp. Something's wrong, he knows, Basilpaw isn't the type to rush out of camp on a whim, not when it's blatant rule-breaking, not when his steps are followed by the cries and questions of his clanmates. He has an idea of what could be wrong — Basilpaw's never been much a fan of the rain, and Lichenpaw's never missed the way he shudders when the droplets hit his back. There was good cover in the twolegplace, but here... well, the apprentice den doesn't do much.

But Lichenpaw is not the only one to follow, and the warriors with their longer legs reach his brother first. There's a splash, and then voices — Basilpaw's stuck? He quickens his steps, reaching his brother just as Nightbird snaps at them for leaving camp. He takes little heed of her words, brushing past to address what's more important here.

There's a tension to Basilpaw, coated in mud as he is. If he doesn't like the rain, Lichenpaw can't imagine the mud is much better. They don't even like the mud, and they've never been as sensitive to these sorts of things as their brother. Lichenpaw draws close, paw hovering but not moving to do anything yet; make sure he's calm enough first, don't want to overwhelm him more. They've been through this before.

"Basil," he says, voice clear. "I — I'm here." No it's alright, unlike Lionthroat, those words always feeling too cheap. They're glad he's at least trying to help, unlike Nightbird. Lichenpaw instead offers I'm here, so they could figure things out together. After a moment, and with a glance towards the more impatient of the two warriors, "Let's. Uh. Let's get you somewhere more dry, yeah?" He steps a little closer, paw reaching further, eyes locking once again with Basilpaw's.

AND I DO THINGS THAT I DON'T REALLY MEAN !
————— ❁ —————

.°❁ info ; visual

• //
  ​
• LICHENPAW named for the lichen on the trees of his home.
  — he/him or they/them. 10 moons.
  — thunderclan apprentice, mentored by blizzard fang.
  — bears a near-permanent nervous grin.
  
  primary character, high activity. penned by saturnid. IC opinions :']​
• "SPEECH"
  ​
• 

​

 

[BASILWHISKER]

⋆⍋ Each breath is a puttering struggle. Basilpaw's eyes remained wide as saucers, staring down at their mucky paws. He was eerily silent, his labored breathing hardly even causing a stir above the pattering of rain against the leaves and puddles about.

One step. It's one step. He tried to urge himself to make a move. To tear him from diving further into his panic. His sights turn sideways when he hears Lionthroat's approach. No no no. They can't see it. They can't see it. Don't touch me. Their throat starts to feel tight before the young warrior even speaks. They couldn't speak if they wanted to- and stars do they for once. They want to get out of the mud. Out of the rain. Out of this damned forest and all its rain. Why couldn't there be some abandoned shed for him to dig himself under?

He's conflicted between wanting the toms help and dreading the moment Lionthroat realizes the apprentice is weak. He would run to tell the other warriors how pathetic he looked drenched in the rain and crying over some mud. That he wasn't fit to be a warrior, that ThunderClan didn't need anyone that couldn't handle a bit of bad weather.

Nightbird's voice made Basilpaw's tail lash, his way of flinching against the surprise her presence gave him. How many were out here? He had to get out. He couldn't be here- no, they should all leave. Let him get sick in the rain and just-

"Basil..."

He's here. Lichenpaw is here. Pale blue eyes lift from the ground to meet their twin pair, and the first clear breath exhales from Basilpaw's chest. Nightbird, Lionthroat... Howlingstar wouldn't make him break from his unfortunate spell. They allow themself a few more solid breaths before their forehead is pressed against the other's for just a moment. Basilpaw pulled away and gave a short nod to Lichenpaw's words. Right. Somewhere dry, they'll help him get dry. Dry and clean. "Dry... and clean." He repeated his thoughts to steady himself.

A paw slowly drew up from the mud and Basilpaw couldn't help but grunt in displeasure at the feeling. He doesn't let himself dive too deep into it this time, though. Instead he took his brother's stretched paw and pulled the rest of him out. Slow and easy, taking a deep breath with every move. "Dry and clean. I need to- I need to get dry and clean." He would repeat, keeping himself focused on the new task. ​

 

[Lionthroat]

The deafening sound of the rain pattering around them had drowned out whatever noise either of them were trying to make, but Lionthroat knows that look all too well, and doesnt make an effort to repeat himself. So he lets the rain drown him out, hoping that maybe the silence could comfort the frazzled apprentice in a way he had failed to do. He makes a movement forward, but his paw steps are halted as the sound of another approaching warrior takes his attention away from the apprentice.

"Nightbird" he meows, dipping his head in a formal greeting "Simply catching some fresh air with some company" he doesnt care to elaborate, turning his sights back onto Basilpaw. He wasnt sure how lenient their laws were with allowing apprentices unsupervised outside of camp, not that they were alone in the first place. He was supervising after all, wasnt he? Or maybe he wasnt, that was for Basilpaw to decide.

Lionthroat sidesteps as Lichenpaw pushes through to reach Basilpaw, relief washing over him as they soothe his clanmate into relaxation. Siblings, he surmised, given the closeness. It made him happy to know they watched out for one another. Taking Lichenpaws proposal to find somewhere clean and dry, Lionthroat turns back to nightbird, "Ah yes, lets. This rain is starting to weigh me down". He turns to start leading the way back, stopping only to look back at the lead warrior with a tilt of his head, "Coming Nightbird?"

Before going to walk Lionthroat casts a glance over at the two apprentices, his features were tight with concern but his eyes communicated a wordless sentiment. He was here to help if the two of them needed it.

"speech"​

​

 

[nightbird]

her words seem missed as basilpaw continues to soak his feet in the mud. something akin to concern flashes upon a steel gaze as the apprentice's tail just lashes in response. words spring from the other warrior's mouth, instantly hardening it once more. the dip of a flame colored head does little to calm her considering the words that follow. a lie, clear and blatant. the air is far too wet to consider fresh. her throat felt as though it was drowning with each drawl.

lionthroat would not see it, blue eyes trained once more on the apprentice, but she burned into him. fire, doused only slightly by the downpour. what was the reason to speak with such contempt when the truth sat at the tip of their maw? it was obvious basilpaw was experiencing some sort of breakdown, not catching fresh air. did lionthroat not think her suitable to handle such situations? teeth pressed strongly together, nightbird did not shift to make way for lichenpaw.

the warrior turned back to the siblings as basilpaw's words broke through the patter of rain. it seemed lichenpaw was able to get through to the other, at least enough to bring him to a more coherent level. she did not miss the glace thrown her way before the mottled apprentice prompted basilpaw to return to somewhere dry. nightbird does not meet lionthroat's eyes as he looks back her way.

"return when you're able. if your mentors ask why you left, tell them you were helping me," she announces to lichenpaw, reaching her head around to grasp the tail of the squirrel that lay idle on her shoulders. she flung it towards the two, it's body landing with a splash at their paws. it was unlikely basilpaw wanted to talk about what had actually happened. the molly hoped she did not have to explain that this would be their new excuse for an unapproved departure.

pointed ears flicked dismissively at lionthroat's beckoning. despite being wet, cold, and hungry from her hasty exit at dawn, she did not wish to return with the large tom. "no." her sharp response was paired with a pointed glare. turning on mud-caked heels, her tail would flick dismissively in her wake as she stalked off deeper into the territory.

//out ​