i love you but it's hard to believe ☀︎ reunion

[Sunflowermask]

⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊ Maybe it is the cold that draws them back. Sunflowermask's first leafbare alone finds them hiding from early snowfalls in any shelter they can find; fox-burrows and twoleg-trash alike become respite from the cold. They grow thinner, grow weary.

It is lonely out in the wilderness.

It is only when the worst of it has passed and the dusting of snow as settled itself enough for life to creep out once again that they return. They skirt the borders, dance carefully around scent-lines. Skittish as any wild thing, they run before they can be caught. They are a traitor now, a deserter. They fled their clan long ago for a life of wandering, and they do not know how kindly WindClan will take to such disloyalty. They do not come too close to their old home.

It is a familiar ritual to trace their paws across the edges of the Thunderpath, to stare into the murky wastes of ShadowClan's territory. It is nostalgic, a feeling born of that same longing that drew them from WindClan's camp. They return to it, when the loneliness gets to be too much to bear.

They do not expect much of it. They have not seen their ShadowClan friend since before the rebellion, except for stolen glances at gatherings. Their tie was severed with bloodshed, time making the distance far too wide. Horseplace did not offer them the freedom to roam, and they were content to let their traitorous feelings die with every other connection they had made. They need none but themself now, and the company of their collections.

The glint of bone-white fur seems at first like a ghost, a memory pulled from a distant youth. Sunflowermask's breath catches.

A head swallowed by moonlight, a towering molly draped in silver. She looks even more elegant in life than in their memory, all sculpted stone and ivory. She has grown into that childish superiority, now carries herself with all the poise of the iron fist she once dreamed of. Their eyes widen, paws stumbling backwards. It is too late to run; their staring has given them away to piercing seaglass eyes.

"...Maggotfur?" A simple word, the first time they've spoken her name aloud. It was never necessary, before. Their time together was spent in simple quiet. Now, they feel the need to confirm that what they're seeing is real.

‎‎YOU STAY WITH ME - ☀︎ - LIKE GLASS BETWEEN MY TEETH

• @Ternstar.

• 

  
  
  "SPEECH"
  ​

• 
  SUNFLOWERMASK ☀︎ they / them, ex-windclan loner, 23 moons.
  ➳ lithe lilac tortoiseshell with messy fur and bright golden eyes.
  ➳ rarely speaks & has very muted expressions. dislikes physical touch.
  ➳ walks with a slight limp & tends to hold left forepaw off the ground when idle.
  ➳ rain x npc; half-sibling to vulturemask & littermate to goldenstrike & shadowrunner.
  ➳ peaceful and healing powerplay permitted / / underline and tag when attacking
  ➳ penned by SATURNID ↛ saturnids on discord, feel free to dm for plots.

​

 

[Ternstar.]

TELL YOU YOU'RE THE GREATEST
BUT ONCE YOU TURN, THEY HATE US ​

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Ternstar ♛ 25 Moons ♛ Female ♛ She/Her ♛ Leader of Shadowclan

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​

★★★★★★★★★

—— Ternstar is prone to wander — to take all the freedom queendom had denied her, and that eladership now offers. There is no one to argue with her when she wants to take a stroll, not even when she leaves patrols and gaurds behind for a moment of peace. That, she thinks, is the only downside to her role - there is never any time for just her, no moment where she can slip into the background and simply watch, smirk curling on the corners of her lips. No, now there are eyes everywhere - always somebody needing something, or worse still judging.

She cares little for their opinions, but the whispers are irritating nonetheless.

And so she sets out - blissfully taking in the cold chill of the air. For all that leafbare is full of trials and danger, it has always been her favorite. The season she was born in - that she was built for, with thick coat and webbed paws. And the beauty of it, glimmering in frost and dangling icicles and falling snow. Even the clouds of her breath paint a pretty picture, and if nothing else Ternstar has always had an eye for beauty.

The sound of pawsteps is unexpected- head turning. The stranger has not set foot across boundry line - not that foolish it seems, and she ponders whether its worth it to chase them off now or-

Eyes blink, startled. Golden coat, memories of sunshine and moonlight; of bones and blood and battle thrown for friendship. Of whospered words to Magpiepaw, of understanding. Pelt twitches violently as her name - her real name, her first, falls from those lips. 'Maggotfur' they say, and she wants to argue. That isnt her name, not anymore.

Instead what leaves her lips is just as strange, an acknowledgment that this stranger isn't a stranger at all, for all that they no longer smell of moorland grass and sun. " Sunflowermask"

It shouldn't sound so reverential, so pleading, and tail begins to lash angrily. At herself, for hoping, for hurting and at them. For leaving. For coming back.

She thinks of the fear she'd felt at Halfsuns disappearance, the betrayal when she'd learnt of Sunstride... no, Sunstars act of betraying his clan to return them home. The knowledge that they'd been right there the whole time had hurt - and worse still was the lack of explaination. Of apology. She'd returned, time and again to thunderpaths edge - hoping for a glimpse of tortoiseshell pelt. For answers, for understanding. But they'd never came, and one after another she'd lost nearly all she'd held dear.

Sunflowermask was meant to be just another name amidst the rest - dead, gone, never coming back. It hadn't mattered which.

Until they weren't.

"Where have you been? You left — you left, with not so much as a word," she makes no move to move - not yet anyways, words spoken tonelessly, but there is a flash of real hurt that crosses her features. Another pause, another anxioustail lash. " Why are you here?"

She will not cry - not over this.

━ actions & " speech, " & 'thoughts/quotes' ━

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E V E R Y B O D Y - W A N T S - T O - B E - M Y - E N E M Y

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[Sunflowermask]

⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊ Their own name is unfamiliar. They haven't needed it in a longer time, scarcely offered it to those they encountered in their travels. A curt Sunflower was the most that pestering vagabonds would get, and even that was a rarity. They have become nothing but the sun upon their back, the tangles of leaves in their fur. They have shed all their memories like a silken coccoon, and now their fragile wings tremble in the memory of who they once were.

The way she says it is - strange. Like the name itself is a precious thing, silken sunlight trapped between her teeth.

Amd then it is gone. Her tail lashes, her face set in impassive marble. The crack in it feels like something they should not see, that flicker of anguish. They meet it with eyes wide and owlish, petrified in surprise.

They cannot help but think of Cottonsprig, bloodied and pleading for them not to leave. Broken words blaming herself for something far out of anyone's reach; their breaths quicken. This is why they do not think of their old life. They should never have gotten so close to the borders, not here or anywhere else.

At least accusation is easier to deal with than guilt. There are a thousand answers to Maggotfur's question, and none of them satisfy. Sunflowermask plants their paws, checks that they have not crossed the border. They cannot explain their absence, not without tearing open all the wounds that Sootstar left. Their return is far easier. "Missed you," they offer softly. The marshes are quiet in the snow, even the ever-present buzz of mosquitoes and crickets died to an eerie stillness. Only the gentle whisper of the breeze attempts to mask their admission.

Because that's the truth of it, isn't it? They were lonely. Maggotfur has always been their escape.

‎‎YOU STAY WITH ME - ☀︎ - LIKE GLASS BETWEEN MY TEETH

• 

  
  
  "SPEECH"
  ​

• 
  SUNFLOWERMASK ☀︎ they / them, ex-windclan loner, 23 moons.
  ➳ lithe lilac tortoiseshell with messy fur and bright golden eyes.
  ➳ rarely speaks & has very muted expressions. dislikes physical touch.
  ➳ walks with a slight limp & tends to hold left forepaw off the ground when idle.
  ➳ rain x npc; half-sibling to vulturemask & littermate to goldenstrike & shadowrunner.
  ➳ peaceful and healing powerplay permitted / / underline and tag when attacking
  ➳ penned by SATURNID ↛ saturnids on discord, feel free to dm for plots.

​