private i swear to god, let them be happy for a moment / chilled

[Needledrift]

ShadowClan's usually docile camp had become a den of activity in the aftermath of Chilledstar's announcement. Cats buzzed about, some choosing to spend a scant few hours curling into their families, saying their goodbyes if need be. Some chose to steal away for a hunt or a patrol, the idea of a long journey for some distant cure a bit too much to handle in the moment. Needledrift found herself in neither situation. Instead, she stood off to the side, her eyes fixed on one spot - Heavybranch's preferred resting area.

Her jaw had healed enough now that she could eat prey by herself, but mastery over her disability didn't necessarily mean that she still didn't feel helpless now that the flat-faced tom was gone. Numbly, she had thought "who will eat with me now?" when she first saw his body (just as numbly, she realized how selfish she sounded, even to herself.) The numbness still tainted her lips when she had uttered her willingness to go on the journey. Maybe she could help prevent other cats from meeting the same fate as her elder friend. Maybe she would gain some sense of purpose out beyond the clans.

Maybe her friends and apprentices would hate her for abandoning them in their time of need. All of these maybes swirled around her head, all as sinister as the last. She didn't even realize that another cat had been approaching while she spiraled in silence.

@CHILLEDSTAR. ​

 

[CHILLEDSTAR.]

DON'T YOU GIVE ME UP, PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP​

---

if they were being completely honest, they were less sorry for their reaction and more sorry that it hurt. they felt justified in their anger, but perhaps the way the went about it was not the way they should have. but who could blame them? with the world crumbling at the very touch and everything falling around the leader, why would they even be kind? especially to cats who just didn't speak to them a lot nicer? needledrift seemed to be questioning how they did things and instead of bringing it up like a friend would, she yelled at them. at chilledstar. like a boiling pot, they lashed out. perhaps they shouldn't have but what was done was done. all they could do now was try to not do that any longer.

"cricket for your thoughts?"
​