sensitive topics IT'S NOT FAIR | Loner

[GROUSECRY.]

LOOKING CLEAR BUT NEVER RECOGNIZED

cw: starvation, eating of roadkill, mentions/implications of throwing up

The skinny tom's long legs shook under his feather-light weight as he dragged himself from the undergrowth, dulled eyes scanning the black river of hard rock, eyeing for any shapes that sat upon it, mangled and misshapen by the prowling beasts that raced across. He inhaled, the air expanding his brittle ribs before his ears drooped in disappointment, his legs shaking more, threatening to give out. His hind sunk slowly to the ground. How many moons was it now? How long had he been barely scraping by, dragging bloated, rotten carcasses from the blacktop only for it to return a few hours later, hardly surviving on scraps and the occasional mouse. His pelt reeked, matted and greasy from neglect, all thoughts put on living. His stomach didn't even cramp anymore, the hunger was all he thought about but he didn't even feel it anymore, what he'd give to have those days where he could feel the hollowness, the way it sucked against his ribs and sides. The sensation was easier to disassociate on than the fact that he should be dead.

Constant cat smells made his anxiety so bad, Eventide was, honestly, surprised he hadn't given out due to just the fear of one of those cats finding him, rogues with brandished teeth and bloodstained claws that stalked through shadows and scurried across hilltops. They'd rip him to shreds, just like how his brothers were likely ripped apart, gone just like their moms. What have I done? He thought, looking at his paws. He was going to die out here, alone, because he was too scared and didn't want to trust his brothers. How... stupid was he? Even if they all died, atleast they had died together, but now they were separated, all because of him. He could feel tears well in his dull eyes, the exhaustion of his current existence weighing on his tired, young shoulders. A sniffle forewarned before a broken, quiet sob jerked through his malnourished, neglected body, falling to bury his face into his arms and cry quietly.

//he's here, let's see how this goesss​

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[hyacinthbreath]

Starvation was a horrible experience to go through. But nothing felt worse than being forced to eat rotten food to survive said starvation. Hyacinth could say that the experience was the worst shes ever had, aside from watching her parents die in front of her.

She tried not to think about the past that much these days, but the nightmares still haunted her every waking moment. She'd go on long walks at night, and return in the morning just in time with a rabbit or two in her jaws. She'd work herself to the bone if that meant the clan was fed and she returned to them being alive still. They wouldn't poison themselves out of loyalty, they wouldn't brawl to the death to prove themselves.

It wasn't like her home colony here.

In the distance, she noticed a form on the ground- curled in on itself was a young cat, starved and shaking. Sobbing, quietly so. She awkwardly stood still, glancing around to make sure nobody was near before she steeled herself and marched over. Her expression never changed, never shifted from the stoic downturn of her lips or the half-lidded, bored-looking eyes.

"What do you think you're doing, kid?" Hyacinth spoke finally, abruptly- cold, lackluster of any motherly emotion. She couldn't feel such emotions for those who could pose a threat to Sootstar's safehaven. ​

 

[Moonshadow]

ALL THE KING'S HORSES​

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"Hyacinthbreath." Moonshadow's cool and monotone voice would come not far from behind the silver lynx. The stoic she-cat had been out on her own walk when she had heard the quiet sob and the rancid smell of rotting meat invaded her sense.

Her sapphire gaze would settle on the cat before them, nothing but calm analysis in her eyes as she moved to flank the lead warrior's side, "Shall we chase them off or should I report this to Sootstar?"

A soldier requesting her orders was all that could be read from the black smokes' question. There would be no coldness or warmth in her tone, only simple obedience to whatever the higher ranking molly demanded. ​

 

[GROUSECRY.]

LOOKING CLEAR BUT NEVER RECOGNIZED

What do you think you're doing, kid? It tore through his foggy mind like a jagged knife through paper, startling him with a jolt and strangling his cries with a whine. Eventide's body froze, claws that were sheathed now dug into a particularly thick mat atop the back of his head, aqua eyes wide as his breathing hitched. A sniffle was all that was heard from the gross little shape as he lifted his head, turning ever so slightly so that his eyes could see the pair behind him, staring down at him with cold, unforgiving gazes. Tears ran thick lines through his dark fur, another sniffle as the sack of bones shifted, thin fur loosely pulling along his skeleton as he moved so the chocolate mink could face the pair with wide eyes.

"I-I..." His mouth was so dry, voice croaking from lack of use that his jaw just hung open, blinking away the remnants of his tears as his entire body began to shake again. Beg, beg you pathetic idiot! Beg like your life depends on it because it DOES!

Shall we chase them off...? "NO!" He exclaimed, surging up quickly to scramble backwards before his legs, long from his adolescent age and borderline useless his malnourishment, buckled and tangled, knocking him swiftly back onto his side with a painful gasp. A fit of coughing overtook him, weakened body struggling to just exist as he tried to sit up even a little as his ribs ached and his throat scratched and scraped to breath. "Please... please don't hurt me, d-don't chase me off this... this is the only p-place I know th-that gets... I-I don't want to die, please," He weakly pleaded, tears welling in his blue eyes again as Eventide shook his head. "I-I'm no threat I promise... I-I'll likely be dead soon, yeah? T-then you won't even have to worry! J-just don't, please, don't kill me," He was so desperate, the manic laughter, nervous and filled with panic, lilted from his mouth to try and even garner some measly pity, no matter how absolutely macabre it sounded or it stung his heart with dread. ​

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[WEASELCLAW]

The tabby isn't far behind Hyacinthbreath and Moonshadow, white paws carrying a confident, well-muscled body towards a cat who looked ten seconds from collapsing into a pile of rotten meat and bones. Young, but not as young as Sootstar's or Honeytwist's children.

The first thing Weaselclaw does it wrinkle his nose. The she-cats are businesslike, but he can't help but exclaim, "Good skies, this cat's a walking corpse himself! Do you smell that on him?"

Part of him is almost afraid to get closer. He's never smelled a living being that stank of the roadkill flattened to bits on the Thunderpaths. He gives his fellow lead warrior and former barn-mate a wary look. "Don't get too close to him. We don't want whatever rot he's got."

Weaselclaw isn't deaf to the cat's pleas, and his blue eyes glaze with sympathy, but what can he do? If the cat is ill, he shouldn't be around living cats. The leader and medicine cat had young kits. It wouldn't be appropriate to let a diseased loner into their home.
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PENNED BY MARQUETTE​

 

[Dandelionwish]

Couldn't believe his pristinely pointed little ears over what he was hearing here. His clanmates were gathered near a shaking, sobbing cat that looked as though he'd been rolled in the mud and squeezed under a two-leg wheat shredder and all they could do was snort and dismiss them? Not a single attempt to offer words of consolation or ask Honeytwist to check the fellow? The wariness of getting sick he could understand, but they didn't have to be so cold about it! Dandelionpaw strutted forward with both his mismatched eyes locked on the disheveled starving tom and his tail lashing as he turned to two lead warriors and Moonshadow with a frown so tight the wheat stem between his teeth quivered in response to the grit of his teeth. "If I met one of ye dying in the moors I'd offer ye a hare and a kind word! If'n they wanna join that's up to Sootstar and a cat can't work off a debt if ye let'em starve!" How did WindClan expect to self-sustain if they didn't let in outsiders willing to work and help build it up? Were they to wait for kits born in the clan constantly to build their ranks? Sootstar had no issue with barncats and kittypets who put in effort before and with some meat on his bones this tom would be no different.
"Do ye wanna join? Ah'm gonna fetch Honeytwist and Sootstar, but if'n he's sick he can just stay in one of them empty badger den's til 'es better! Ah can fetch'em food daily if ya'll aren't up to it-will hunt it m'self!" His frown turned into a little smile at the idea of helping the cat, surely Sootstar would be fine letting them join if they could pay it back? Give a cat enough time and they'd learn to hunt real well.
"Ah'm Dandelionpaw." He said finally with a turn to the cat there before giving a nod to the trio of adults there, "One tic and ah'll be back in a flash! Don't ye worry-I'm QUICK!" With that the tall point apprentice went dashing back to the camp.

@honeytwist & @SOOTSTAR
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[GROUSECRY.]

LOOKING CLEAR BUT NEVER RECOGNIZED

//ic opinions
The brown tom's already withered pride shriveled to nothing as another cat joined them, his features flinching at the exclamation of the older tom and wary looks. A very dulled, nearly-forgotten speck of himself felt resentment to the older brown tom, resentment that he was being perceived like such a disgusting creature, that he'd caused this downfall of himself all because of his cowardice. Dusk wouldn't of allowed him to get this bad, Dusk would have grabbed Eventide by his scruff and forced him to groom... His gaze dropped down, shame drowning his fear just enough as a stinging thought retorted the tom's accusation of disease and rot, dripping with annoyance, crossed his mind. You'd eat anything you come across too if you were as desperate as me. How unfair and privileged of these cats to expect everyone to know how to survive on their own, and they still had the nerve to turn their noses to him, act so much more better then him because their bellies were full of fresh prey and their nests were clean and their pelts shone. But, even still, all he could muster is a quiet little squeak in response, "Please... I-I'm not diseased, I-I think." It was so pitiful, so small, that the shame burned in his chest like a hot fire, suffocating that urge to fight, to exclaim and scream-not like he had one anyway. That wasn't who he was. That was Dusk, that was Dawn... Little Eventide, Mama's little burr in her leg, always next to her, never interacting with his family...

Then, like a beam of hope and light, another voice exclaimed. At first Eventide flinched, pressing his measly body farther against the ground, wide eyes darting up incase it was directed at him, but... a point, maybe a little bit younger than him, was berating the older cats for their... treatment of him. And, though fear still wafted off of him, his aqua eyes misted with the words to younger tom spoke, voice choked a little as he just... nodded, desperate. They'd help him? For once since he'd gotten himself stranded, his stomach churned, churned in hope and in expectation of real food, warm... fresh food. Already his mouth watered, but he panickly shot the others a look, wary they'd allow the young cat to actually do that... Rogues weren't known for helping, rogues were aggressive-they'd already talked idly of chasing him off, what's to say they won't reprimand the kind beacon of light for helping him.

Ah'm Dandelionpaw. Dumbfounded, Eventide gazed back, lifting a shaking paw as he murmured thickly, likely unheard due to just how quiet his voice was, "E-Eventide... my name is Eventide." But as the words left his maw, his ray of hope was gone, parting with words of being back with... did he mention bringing others? So he just... had to wait until then. Flustered, he tucked his scrawny, dirty paw back under himself, eyes averted from the older cats but keeping them generally in his peripheral vision. If they decided to attack him, he wanted to atleast be aware when he was dying. As he sat there, his mind remained on the other's name. Dandelionpaw... funny name for the cat with a funny voice. Charming. A ghost of a smile quirked his lips just a bit.​

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[honey]

Honeytwist is here as soon as shes fetched by sweet Dandelion, but theres a wretched smell in the air that makes her nose wrinkle. At first shes convinced shes staring at a corpse and she sighs, just a bit, trying to remember what she could use to hide the scent of death. Lavender, perhaps, maybe she could rub it on the pelt- but theres a voice. And where theres a voice, theres a spark of hope.

"Bonjour mon ami." she greets him softly, an irritated ear flicking at her clanmates ‘greetings’. "He is not diseased. If he was then it stinks quite like infection. Sour." she quips towards Weasel, remembering her time on the streets with a slight wince. So much death and suffering. "Moon, please be a dear and fetch something for him. Poor thing looks like he can’t even properly walk." she pads over, attempting to press lightly on his side. Shes not sure what his problem is, why he appeared so weak (though she does note hunger), why he smelt so bad. She thinks to herself.

"For now we will wait for Sootstar and provide him with food. I will personally hunt for more if it is a problem." eyes slide back to Weasel and Hyacinth, daring them to challenge her. Medicine cats know best, don’t they?

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"speech"​

 

[ROSEPAW]

Sometimes Rosepaw just wanted to cry when he saw how coldhearted his clanmates could be. It just made him so sad to see how they would literally let a cat die like this who really needed thier help!. Rosepaw was hesitant to speak up against the lead warriors and the warriors though since they where older then he was, and all three of them who was being present was quite intimating...He didn't wanted to see them do the same thing Sootstar had done to Flanders though. But what could he possibly do to change his clanmates minds?. Dandelionpaw did what Rosepaw was trying to build up the courage to do, and now with another cat coming in to defend this poor cat to share the same thoughts he was having it become a bit easier for him to step forward himself.

" D-Dandelionpaw is right. We c-can't let him die.. " he spoke up with a slightly trembling voice, wishing more then ever for Leechpaw to be here right now or even better Duskfire. He for sure wouldn't let a cat who was not much older then him die on this cold ground, right?. He wanted to think his mentor would feel the same way as he did if he was here right now. Rosepaw ears suddenly perked up when he heard the name this tom was forcing out of his mouth to introduce himself with. Eventide?. That was a distant familliar name...It was then he actually recognized them. Hadn't he lived in the swamp land?. What was he doing all the way out here and not in Shadowclan?.

Now did not felt the right to ask a such question though but he knew he needed to try to help his former groupmate now!. He would walk himself over to the tom who was at thier mercy before he turned his back to put himself in front of them to stand between him and his clanmates. "At least wait until Dandelionpaw gets here with Honeytwist...please?." he looked pleading, begging, and like his prays had been heared the medicine cat arrived. He would look towards them before he respectfully stept back again to let her investigate Eventide.

When he found out that even her was against to leave Eventide out here to die he felt this knot inside his stomach to loose up a bit. He would look at them with gratitude as he nooded his head in agreement. He was so glad that Honeytwist was here now, maybe even Sootstar would listen to the cat that starclan had choosen as thier medicine cat.

// this sucks :-: i also got ninjad like twice while writing this lol



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[hyacinthbreath]

Hyacinth watches as cats begin to arrive, defending the starving cat- and Hyacinthbreath turns to Weaselclaw with an irritated look. Sootstar wouldn't be happy to have a loner on her borders, let alone one that could carry an illness. She gestures to her fellow Lead Warrior, as if asking for his backup, before turning to Moonshadow.

"Grab something small for now. I don't want him to be too full." She responds coldly to Moonshadow, turning her judgemental gaze towards Honeytwist. StarClan must have made a mistake, allowing Honeytwist into WindClan like this. But saying that would be doubting Sootstar, and Hyacinth wouldn't dare. Stepping back, Hyacinth leans in to whisper to Weaselclaw. Sootstar would be here soon.

"She's not going to be too happy that Honeytwist is treating someone outside of WindClan, what do we do? Just sit and watch, then?" She spoke hushly against the other warrior's ear, before backing up to stand beside him. Dandelionpaw could go get Sootstar if he wanted to. They acted like just because there was someone starving at their borders, they were justified to help them.

That's not how the world worked.​

 

[GRACKLEDIVE]

Hunting has been his key focus for much of the morning. He's been back and forth to camp bringing in food for the nursery for the most part and for the elders but this trip he finds himself on now brings him to this scene. A rabbit is clutched in his jaws and he stares with a sense of annoyance in his gaze. How terrible a cat much be to turn against someone starving and hardly able to be a threat. It's mind boggling to him and he finds himself frowning just a bit. Stepping forth the black and white time flicks his tail and slips his way around the other cats. His gaze is pensive because he knows what this must look like but he also finds in himself not a reason to care too much about the opinions of others. The cat is starving, nothing but skin and bones. So he drops the rabbit down in front of them. "Hope this helps you. I just caught it, so it's warm. Make sure to eat it slow, don't want you to over do it." He smiles softly then as he takes a step back from the other then.

The name he picked up as he came forward was Eventide. He hopes that they other will hopefully stay with them, sending them off now in a state like this doesn't bode well for the other's life. He looks over his shoulder for Dandelion and the approach of their leader Sootstar. Maybe he should pray to this Starclan that things go well for this one.

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[SOOTSTAR]

"Listen to your lead warrior!" The blue molly arrives with a thunderous hiss sent Grackledive's direction. The wind had carried her lead warrior's voice to her, something small had been her words. A rabbit? That was too big, WindClan did not give handouts to just anyone who waltzed into their land. Sick, injured, or otherwise.

"You let this cat eat at that rabbit Grackledive that'll serve as your share of prey for the next two sunrises. You hunt for your clan first, so if you gift this? It'll be your sacrifice, not WindClan's." A firm warning and a "deal" she'd make sure Grackledive stuck to if he went through with this. When a lead warrior demands something of a warrior, they listen and obey.

At last judgmental green orbs are placed upon the starved stranger, something about him sparked familiarity... though she couldn't quite grasp it. Perhaps it's because this cat was nothing but skin and bones? "My warriors need to learn they cannot help everything and everyone that stumbles helplessly onto our borders. You stand in WindClan territory, and before you is I, Sootstar, leader. The cats you see are only a small fraction of my clan... so you can guess I have plenty of mouths to feed." It was far from a lie, the moor group has grown quite rapidly.

This cat could add to her numbers, but it'd be a long time until he gained back his weight, his strength, was it an investment worth her time?

"You can't stay." The first cat she's ever turned away, she's allowed her heart to open to strangers for long enough. Her clan was even home to kittypets desperate to prove themselves... It was time she puts her paw down. She needed to start teaching the cats of her clan that they could not and would not everyone. They'd have to learn how to shield their throbbing hearts for the sake of their clan. "Eat whatever my warriors are willing to sacrifice from their own diet. Rest in the abandoned badger set den with a couple of my warriors until sundown. With the energy you can muster, Hyacinithbreath and Moonshadow will escort you to a different clan's borders. I'm sure one of them have the resources to take you in and nurse you back to health." Sootstar believed that to be plenty kind, but she was certain many of her clan-mates would disagree.

Again, this would be a lesson for many of them. ​

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[Duskfire]

I WANT SOMETHING JUST LIKE THIS​

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**Trigger Warning**

Dusk didn't mean to stare. Really, he didn't. But the second his green eyes had landed on the sickly figure it was like all the ghosts of his past came rushing out to meet him, slipping through the walls he'd put up as if they're never been there to begin with. He swallowed thickly at the sight of pale spots and gaunt features, and for a moment he wasn't out on the edge of the moors with his clan anymore. No, he was back in that crowded space were all that surrounded him were spots and death and that putrid smell.

And he felt his heart lurch forward in his chest, racing as if it could outrun the memories and the sickening feeling that was washing over him. Instinctively hef flexed his claws and the bite into grass and earth beneath his feet seemed to ground him, reminding him that he was still here; still free.

The proceedings went by in a blue, his clanmates words lost on him as he finally tore his eyes away, unable to look at them any longer.

Sootstars orders, for the first time, brought up mixed feelings in the copper-gold tomcat. For the first time a small part of him was considering openly objecting to Sootstars words. Because this kid was him, just a spotted, starving scrap of fur looking for a fucking break in life. And a part of him knew Windclan could give that to him, because it'd given it to Dusk, slowly fixing all those broken things inside of him. and he wasn't done healing yet, but he couldn't deny that it was happening- that things were just better here.

But that part of him was nothing compared to the crushing weight of relief that swept over him, soaked in guilt that he was happy he wouldn't have to look at them and be reminded. He just wanted to forget that part of his life, and this ghost of his past wouldn't make that any easier on him. Hell, he had enough time dealing with Ferret. Another clan could definitely take care of them just as well, even if that thought gnawed at him.
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windclan warrior - male - 17 months - homosexual - polyamorous - single - tall, strong bengal tomcat

 

[GROUSECRY.]

LOOKING CLEAR BUT NEVER RECOGNIZED

The arrival of more kind words, more beacons of hope, filled Eventide's eyes with tears. He still flinched as the kind molly touched him, but her words... her words brought safety. Safety he hadn't had since his mothers disappeared. He groaned as she pressed against him, feeling the hollowed out feeling of his stomach finally. Eventide grimaced, exhaling harshly as a pained gasp exited his body. He shuffled his weight, trying to allow her a better... look? She seemed like one of the rare types who knew herbs, the cling of familiar plants reminding him idly of his Mom. "I-I've... I've been living o-off of the things that th-they kill," Weakly, he pointed with his tail toward the black stone river. As he shifted, more and more nicks, scrapes, and cuts are revealed. They're healed but the skin, around them is short, ripped at in an attempt to likely try and futilely stop infection, but even still, it was clear he wasn't always successful. Even his face was nicked up though the grime hid it pretty well. More defense that made Eventide blink in the direction of a ginger tom with gratitude, his heart pounding so hard it made him quiver in place. Hysterical hope, for once since his seeming sentencing of death, gleamed in his dulled aqua eyes, fighting the acceptance that he'd die. Because now... now he could live.

Something he rarely got hit his nose. His mouth watered and he pushed himself, shaking like a newborn deer, to his paws, legs widened to hold him up even to a sitting position as a black and white tom spoke kind words and dropped a whole... "Rabbit..." He murmured in awe. He'd held off crying this long, his fear was enough to stop the emotional display, but the moment the food, real food, was at his paws, his breath hiccuped, tears falling from his eyes as he collapsed once more but this time against the rabbit, it's fur still... still having that warmth. But not like the warmth of the creatures he usually ate, the ones when they've sat so long in the sun, their bodies bloated and ruined and the skin too chewy to feel like food, but this... this was warm in the way it's heart once beat, it's muscles once thrived, and it's body had fought just like his to survive. Pressing his forehead to the prey, he uttered a quick thanks to the creature, for it's life wasn't going in vain, before pulling back and he bit, tenderly, into the flesh of its side.

As he chewed, he cried, his breath hiccuped and fresh tears ran trails through his dirty cheek fur, his shoulders shaking with the effort of his sobs. Eventide had to stop chewing a moment, his claws digging into the prey as, fearfully, he remembered others didn't want him eating. They were stingy and he shot them wary glances, pulling his rabbit to himself as he swallowed with a bit of trouble. Another bite, this one more ravenous, as he tasted warm blood that triggered his body to need and desire food once more. Still, he sniffled, hiccuping but, for once, surrounded by those who wanted to help him, he smiled and he looked at each one who'd done something nice thus far. "T-thank you...thank you so much, I-I'll pa-"

Listen to your lead warrior! And like a slap of reality, here charged a grey storm of a molly, those striking eyes reminding him, swiftly that reality wasn't kind. Quickly, she introduced herself as this Sootstar... the cat who his entire life now teetered upon. Shrinking away from her, he gripped his rabbit desperately to his chest, claws digging deeply into the fur. But, still, he hoped. He hoped with all the hope his 9 months could garner, that maybe... maybe she'd take pity on him, just like the kind brown molly next to him and provide him help.

But, again, reality wasn't kind. Reality wasn't as kind as finding the rare kind group of rogues, reality was dingy dirty holes next to thunderous sounds of the monsters that almost killed you. Reality was the rubbery flesh after days of putting it off, of watching with stubborn, eyes only to give in and sink his teeth into sour, nasty tasting flesh. Reality was crying as you desperately did everything to hold that meal down, stomach cramping from eating too much after so long of not eating and still fucking failing. And as three words hit his ears, he sat frozen, dumbfounded almost, as the crushing weight of reality sunk in. And, for once, he didn't want it. Desperate, the brown mink tom crawled his way toward the grey molly, his dark brown paws, the pads burned raw from walking atop the blacktop after hot days, grasping desperately for her pelt. Because if she was to sentence him to death, he wanted her to see him. See him for the cat he was, for the borderline child left stranded at this so-called clan's borders. "P-please... m'am, I-I'll do anything. D-don't send me back out there," He pleaded, groveled even. Did cats have no humanity anymore? Was everyone so desperate to prove pride over anything, to flex power, that they'd turn a blind eye to those who needed help more than anything, who needed the prey more than their full bellies already had. Even now, he could smell the earth, the smell of fresh rain, sticking idly to her pelt as his paws grasped uselessly for her own paws. "I'll learn to hunt... I-I'll clean any nests, I-I-I-just please don't send me away... I-I don't want to die, I don't want to die, p-puh-puh-ple-he-ease!" His voice cracked, his body shaking with desperation as he sobbed, broken and grave as he sobbed, wracking his weak body with painful stabs, his aqua eyes blinded by the cascade of tears, his breath smelling of the rot and bile from many meals being regurgitated after eating. He couldn't go back there. If he did, this cat may aswell kill him now, grovelling and begging, at her paws, because he knew he'd never find his way out. Desperate, shaking, he wildly glanced to his defenders, his beacons of light, urging them to tell her like they did the others, to get her to sympathize with him. He needed them to help him, he needed to be away from this place of death and decay and go somewhere warm with food and safety.​

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[hyacinthbreath]

Hyacinthbreath wasn't a merciful cat, and certainly wasn't the type to sugarcoat things for people. Especially strangers. Whipping her head down as she heard the apprentice-aged tom start sobbing, begging their goddess for help. Jealousy ate at her heart then, dark and grueling, yet she remained neutral in facial expressions. He didn't deserve to touch her.

"Get your filthy, infection-riddled paws off of her." It's a dark tone, scary and unbecoming of her- pupils narrowed into slits. It's a side of herself she didn't like to show to others, but it was present nonetheless- possession at its finest. She glances over at Honeytwist, a wild look in her eyes- and it's then that she registers just how much she doesn't like the woman.

You're weak. Weak, weak, weak.

"We don't know if he could be sick with something. Keeping him around is a horrible decision to make. Let him stay at the badger den until he heals, then we should see if he's worthy enough." She offers with a dark lull, unsympathetic eyes glaring down at Evertide. There was no light in lavender-tinted eyes, no reassurance. She couldn't stand a creature like this. "If he can survive that, then he's worthy of being a WindClan cat, I'd say." ​

 

[GRACKLEDIVE]

The tom stiffens when he sudden hears the shout of Sootstar, turning to look over his shoulder at the grey woman. He remembers quite suddenly that not too long ago she killed a cat but at the same time he can not be unkind to someone who is suffering and has not done anything wrong to them. With a frown he listens to her words and he finds them too harsh and unfair. He just finished hunting for his clan not too long ago. Brought back prey so that they can eat because that is what he always does first, it's what this group has taught him. "Fine then. I guess I'm not going to be eating for the next two sunrises. He's already started eating it anyway and I'm not bothered with sharing a single piece of prey with someone who obviously needs it right now. I've done my share of hunting for today anyway." If he doesn't have to eat for a while that is fine. It'll be taxing to have to work on an empty stomach but it'll give him discipline that he needs.

As the young one starts to tremble and shake he turns his attention on him. He can see the desperation coming off of him in waves and his tail flicks with his own agitation. How can they be so cruel as to not look at this cat and see his suffering. It's almost monstrous but he holds his tongue as he shakes his head, one moment and then another. His jaw flexes, sharp teeth clamped before he looks at Hyacinthbreath and away, he knows which cats he will be staying away from. "Ridiculous, simply ridiculous. He's barely old enough to be out here on his own and he's starving but it's just okay to leave him and hope he survives out here alone." His words are a bitter mutter. He'll come back to visit him, bring him something if he needs it. Hopefully Honeytwist can help him more.

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[honey]

"You’re safe now, amor." she murmurs under her breath as the annoyance still prickles at her back, sympathy in her eyes. But then Sootstar snaps and then she snaps and her fur is bristling once more in anger. "The kid is fucking dying!" she near screeches, desperate as she stands closer to him now. They wouldn’t do anything to her, she knows this now, because how fucking weak would a clan be without their medicine cat? She cackles, soft and light as her tail begins to thrash back and forth.

"Heartless, heartless, heartless, all of you." she accuses with a new light. Honeytwists patience has finally snapped, leaving behind a bitter and angry cat. The kid lurches towards Sootstar and then Hyacinth speaks and her nerves grate. "Shut up, shut up, shut up. You know NOTHING." she feels as if shes practically losing herself to her anger, but this was a child, how could these cats be so cruel? She begins to pace with claws unsheathing and scraping the ground, breaths heavy. Shes surrounded by cats that don’t care, and with loathing she feels the strongest amount of anger towards the stars. She looks up at the sky with her chin held high. Screw all of you. she thinks towards them but once again slightly winces as Marigolds young face flashes in her mind.

And then she remains silent, seating herself all while seething, her pelt still bristling. She was the medicine cat, she decided who she healed, she decided who lived, who died. "Then i’m staying with him at the badger den. I will give him the help he needs and hunt for him. I don’t want any of you to touch him if you think hes so disease riddled." she sneers with flattened ears.

She doesn’t know what has gotten in to her, to be so nasty. But she does know part of it is the drive to help these poor children that her clanmates keep trying to bully.

​

"speech"​

 

[Dandelionwish]

He had arrived back shortly after finally fetching Sootstar and he didn't like what he was hearing. The cat was begging for his life and they were-Dandelionpaw's tail lashed but it was only Grackledive's presence and sensibility that kept him quiet and grounded and the apprentice danced forward to stand next to the tall monochrome tom as the situation unfolded. His mismatched eyes noticed Duskfire silently looking away as if affronted by the sight of the poor young cat, found his gaze drilling holes into the deputy in silent demands: why are you just standing there? The young tom didn't have it in him for hatred or disdain, but the disappointment he felt was obvious. If the clan was struggling he would have understood, at least a little better, not wanting to feed another mouth; but he still expected kindness. Guess he'd have to carry the lion's share of nicety on his own. "'E can have my food fer the next few days too!" The point tom declares in solidarity with Grackledive.

Honeytwist, usually so quiet and almost docile had unleashed a tirade and his fur prickled in silent awe at the medicine cat admonishing the others with an intensity he had never witnessed in the pretty healer before. That he did not smile was a testament to his own willpower, because he expected his grinning would be taken as some for of dissent-when what he wanted taken as dissent was just his words.
He didn't like the idea of Honeytwist being out in the badger's den-simply because he knew she had kits who would worry and clanmates who would have need of her-it would be so much more simple if they could have the hurt tom at the camp. If the medicine cat said he wasn't sick-then he trusted that.
Despite not liking the compromise he held his tongue on it, they had to do something and if they pushed too hard it was liable to backfire.
"Ah'll run back and forth for 'er!" Dandelion insisted, "If ye need 'er, I'll fetch 'er and stay out. Ah'll bring food and everything." Was he signing up to be a ceritified errand cat? Hells, probably. It was going to be an exhausting affair.


​

 

[SOOTSTAR]

"Only it's not your prey to give away." Sootstar would coolly meow to Grackledive, "If its caught on WindClan land, it's WindClan prey. I don't give a hare's tail if you've done your share." Not in this situation anyways... to the blue smoke it was irrelevant.

In a blink of the eye, the stranger is suddenly grasping at her paws... Sootstar just stares down in shock, her maw slightly agape... She's truly never witnessed anything more pathetic and sorrowful... no matter what physical or mental state she was in, the she-cat could never see herself pleading this desperately as this feline was.

At Hyacinthbreath's words, Sootstar finds herself pulling her tiny paws away from the starved feline's touch. She listens to her lead warrior, and after a moment of thought she nods. "That's what we'll do... we'll- we wi-" Her words abruptly stop and she swallows them back down as the medicine cat begins to speak.

Sootstar's eyes narrow harshly. "You want to abandon camp, leave behind the sick, wounded, and elderly there for a cat who is not even WindClan? Fine, go ahead. Anyone who gives food to this cat will be losing out on their own share, I will not have my clan-mates bellies grumble and kill off what could be future leaf-bare prey for a non-WindClan cat. Call me what you'd like, but I'm putting my clan first above all else."

She looks back down at the stranger who was likely still nearby her paws. "You hear? You'll stay in the badger set den, Honeytwist will look after you. Survive and you can be a WindClanner and pay off your debt to us."

With a flick of her tail she turns and departs from the scene. Her final order was given, she only wasted her time remaining there and arguing with disgruntled clan-mates. ​

---

 

[GROUSECRY.]

LOOKING CLEAR BUT NEVER RECOGNIZED

One of them hisses at him, the one who came here first, and his ears flick back, head snapping around as his aqua eyes meet hers like she was holding her claws to his throat. Within those depths is desperation, the desire to live and the knowledge that this was his only hope. He doesn't remove his paws, the claws grasping like he was falling off the edge of a cliff and Sootstar was the only cat there to save him, Eventide's breathing is labored and wheezy, his lion-like tail puffed out as he stares at her. And, in that moment, an opinion is formed. An opinion of bitter resentment as he stares at the gray and white purple-eyed molly. You don't understand, you can't understand how it is with your pretty, perfect existence, never hungry, never fearful. But the look of fear doesn't shake as Sootstar pulls her paws away, as everyone bickers amongst themselves, and his eyes return, his claws buried into the soil under his paws, the look of fear remains as the kind brown molly who smelled of herbs screeches and threatens the others with the removal of her existence in their camp. And he doesn't argue, because he did need it. He needed it more than anyone in this moment, because he was dying.

Sootstar speaks again and Eventide looks up, pleading silently as he sniffles, ears perked hopefully. And, like a wash of relief, he's given permission. Permission to stay, even if it's in this old badger den, even if he has to work his tail off for the rest of his life, because he would have a life. He let out a long sigh, slumping down onto the ground a moment and breathing, forehead pressed against the dirt. He was going to be fine, he wasn't going to die. He wasn't completely doomed. Shaking, he forced himself to his paws, standing unsteadily on the thin twig-like things he called legs and grabbed his rabbit that the black and white tom gave him-it already was cold but it was better than anything he'd eaten in awhile, likely he would finish it by tomorrow and it'd still be good-and looking to the herb-cat and peppy Dandelionpaw for directions.​

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