- Jul 6, 2024
- 63
- 14
- 8
What Wormwatcher had done to Ashenfall and Flintwish had been wrong. As soon as he let his own insecurities unleash upon Flintwish he knew immediately what it would be interpreted as. Bigotry. The cognizant tom is overly aware of how jealousy seems to dictate many of his emotions, it has always had a threatening near-chokehold over him... he has contributed much effort to curbing it, or holding back the uncontrollable need to spat envious vitriol. It's hard to do as such. The sight of the young tom's accepting themselves, embracing the love they hold for each, and thereafter beginning a family stings Wormwatcher. It's everything he can't do as long as he is constrained by the all-consuming hatred he holds for himself. The irony is nauseating, he knows, that he wants to be so free from these restraints but inadvertently sows the hate he fears.
There is no avoiding them. Wormwatcher visits the nursery, for Ternfrost and her kits, though he attempts to make his time spent their brief as he does not wish to make Ashenfall uncomfortable. The blue tom does not wish to impede upon what should be a space of safety. The guilt though, the tenseness within the nursery whenever he visits, it has become too much now for Wormwatcher. He cannot stand the fact he has earned the title of a bigot, a disgusting mischaracterization of his own doing. When the opportunity arises for Wormwatcher to speak to Ashenfall he approaches cautiously.
Wormwatcher nears when he sees Ashenfall step out of the nursery, seemingly for some fresh air. The chimera swipes his tongue around his maw nervously and then purses his lips, he hopes Ashenfall will turn away and give him the cold shoulder. But he doesn't, so he must commit to this. "Ashenfall," he mews, dipping his head politely to his youth. "Do you have a moment-" His pale gaze falters towards the entrance of the nursery. Ashenfall could easily escape the conversation be returning to his family's nest. "-I won't be long."
His shoulders slope forward, he appears to wilt beneath Ashenfall's gaze, and hesitantly says, "I should not have... ruined your happiness, it was unfair of me to be so rude to Flintwish." Wormwatcher's brows knit as he suddenly realizes, maybe he wouldn't remember, maybe it did not matter... and that the tom was yet again being entirely selfish by even bringing it up again. 'You guys have fun being miserable', Wormwatcher wouldn't be able to forget these words so easily. He tips his angular head and searches Ashenfall's face. Though he resembles his mother so much, Wormwatcher can't resist picking out features that echo Smogstar's. "I know it doesn't make sense... but I was happy for you two, truthfully... And I offer you my deepest apologies, to you and Flintwish. I-" He searches for more words, and cannot find them any longer. Such a lack of words, which normally flood from him without his control, makes him nervous and he shuffles, tongue clicking nervously as he awaits Ashenfall's judgement: would his apology be accepted? Should he grovel more, he can, he would if it meant there was no bad blood between himself and them.
