camp let you down - wall repair, rta


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    #9b7143



  • Sunlitpaw

    Is questioning their purpose in life​

    kit
    skittish
    inquisitive
    experience: untrained
    backstory: royalty
    biography: [HYPERLINK]
    credit to punk for the clangen code :3
    nonbinary [they / she]
    eyes: green
    pelt: chocolate torbie
    fur length: long
    parents: wolfsong and sunstride
    6 moons



/gentle cw for self-deprecating thoughts & denying oneself food!

The WindClan camp feels so unfamiliar, as though Sunlitpaw had seen it in a past life before and was stepping in with new blood. Perhaps they were, in a sense. Blood splattered the snow, almost a blessing despite the grisly sight. It would not soak the soil they had grown tussling in, would not stain the grass they would hide in as a kit hiding in Wolfsong's shadow.

Coward.

The blood faded with every cycle of the sun. Sunlitpaw no longer hid in the shadow of the medicine cat, no no - Sunlitpaw skirted away from their family whenever they could, since they had reclaimed their home from the tyrant of the moors.

Who is this 'they'?
Not you.

Coward.


Sunstride had defeated Sootstar on his own - Sunlitpaw caught glimpses of a limp, ashen figure held up only by their father's mass. Their siblings had fought valiantly, defended their home, defended their family and yet - yet. The astute would've noticed that the timid middlekit of their brave, their valiant, their admirable pillars of the Clan had been absent from the battle to reclaim WindClan. Sunlitpaw had been hiding, staying back, staying out of sight, staying away.

Coward.
Failure.


Sunlitpaw was a living, weeping disappointment. They felt so horribly wrong - how could they fail their family, their Clan, their own heart? The desire to protect had been quashed fiercely by fear. They had failed. Sunlitpaw had been unable to meet the gazes of any of their family members, offering sparse words to any that tried to seek them out. Sunlitpaw would not be easy to corner, they kept their paws deftly busy with camp in a desperate attempt to make themselves useful after their own fear of death had crippled them to the point of uselessness. Repairing the walls was the simplest of picks for them - it kept their fidgety paws busy, gave them an excuse to ignore their surroundings to stare intently at weaving gorse and avoiding thorns with broadening paws. Sunstride, the cat they were even named for, used his own paws for things much more impressive. Sunlitpaw's heart quickened at the mere idea of having to confront his father some day, whether he knew the truth of Sunlitpaw's absence or whether he just wanted to check up on Sunlitpaw. Sunlitpaw loved their family, so deeply they wished to have never burdened them to begin with.

Their stomach rumbles audibly, slowing their movements with a gentle frown. No no, they were not quite deserving of prey yet. They had more to make up for, still. More to hide, more to cover. Spring green eyes break away from their work briefly to see who might have heard the disruption to the gentle chatter of their peers, before quickly snapping back to their work after catching awkward eye contact. Oh no.

 
Truthfully, Spotkit didn't mean to stare, crouched in the corner of camp, watching the hustle and bustle as new Windclan tried to replace the old. Thats what his mama said, anyways... She came back with some nasty scratches when she had returned to the nursery, but all she had said was that it was from some bad guys...

Anyways.

Sunlitpaw is hard to miss, shying towards camp walls, avoiding eye-contact, being... weird! Even harder to miss with their bright pelt of oranges, whites and chocolates, inwardly jealousy flares for just a second. Everyone has orange on them.... His mama does, too, he wants orange! But he settles down as he rises to his paws, teetering over to stare quite obnoxiously. He stands silent for a few heartbeats, just watching, observing, before he opens his mouth. "How are you doing that?" he questions, furrowing pretend brows in concentration, trying to relay the weaving motion in his head. Up, down, up... What was next...? "Can you teach me how to do that? I wanna be cool like you." he finishes his sentence with a nod. Cool like Sunlitpaw! Is that their name...? Maybe its Sunlightpaw... Spotkit doesn't betray the fact that he isn't sure what their name was and instead continues watching them work.

  • 76245576_FCJi2DzeAxPuyT4.png
    -> spotkit
    -> amab ,, he/him ,, 2 months
    -> kitten of windclan
    -> small & oddly proportioned cinnamon tom with high white
    -> "speech, afd9f2" ,, thoughts
    -> unknown sexuality ,, single
    -> smells like windblown heather
    -> art by meg
 
༄༄ The calico tunneler comes to a stop beside Sunlitpaw, regarding the younger feline’s work with a scrutinizing golden gaze. "You look busy," she says, her tone carefully flat. It is an observation made without judgement, for once, and Scorchstreak even offers the two younger cats a friendly flicker of an orange ear. She's about to praise their hard work when the sound of the apprentice's stomach interrupts her. Have they not eaten yet? Not that Scorchstreak can truly question them for it—she herself hasn’t eaten much in recent days, if only so that her worse-off clanmates have more to eat. With all the injuries others acquired in the final fight against Sootstar’s warriors, those in Wolfsong’s den need to eat as much as they can in order to heal.

Still, Scorchstreak is a fully-grown warrior, not an apprentice who still has plenty of growing to do. She has gone hungry before; she knows what she can handle, and when her hunger starts to become a true problem. So she jerks her chin toward the fresh-kill pile, in case the apprentice has somehow gotten so caught up in their work that they’ve forgotten about it. "A patrol just brought back a mouse, it looked like it'd make a good meal if you're hungry." She will not press, but she will not scorn the younger WindClanner for eating, even if their task is not finished. Leniency is important during this time, she understands. "Perhaps you could tell Spotkit all about how it’s done while you eat."
 


Perhaps at another time, in another battle, Rattleheart would have noticed Sunlitpaw's absence. She might have commented on it to Scorchstreak, or fretted over where the apprentice was and whether they were safe. When it came to the final fight against Sootstar and her loyalists though, she really hadn't the chance to even think about anything like that. Her focus had been solely on defending herself and others, along with fighting to reclaim what was rightfully their home. The presence of Sunstride and Wolfsong's other children had been a fact she had noticed, sure, but hardly one that she had dwelled on. The tunneler probably wouldn't be able to recite which of them was or was not fighting alongside their parents, not unless she was standing in front of them to see their wounds.

A blessing for Sunlitpaw - or a curse, depending on your perspective.

She had been sifting through the freshkill pile nearby when she heard the sharply contrasting voices of Spotkit and her sister, both commenting on the hard work that Sunlitpaw's attention seemed to be solely focused on. So much so that they weren't paying attention to what their body had to say, at least based off of Scorchstreak's suggestion. Setting aside a slim rabbit for herself once the time to eat came, Rattleheart moved over from the pile to the gorse wall, offering up a tired grin of her own. "And if mouse isn't to your taste, there's a few other things too. Prey isn't quite as plentiful as the mice at the barn were, but at least it won't be long before things start to heat up again." Before all of this, she would've considered another moon until newleaf to be an eternity. However, with so much left to be done to make sure that they were all settled back into camp, she was sure the time would go flying by without issue. "You've already done quite a bit today... it looks good." Her words were just as genuine as those of her sister, even if they might have been difficult for the apprentice's guilty mind to accept.
[ PENNED BY EO ]
 

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    #9b7143



  • Sunlitpaw

    Is feeling embarrassed​

    kit
    skittish
    inquisitive
    experience: untrained
    backstory: royalty
    biography: [HYPERLINK]
    credit to punk for the clangen code :3
    nonbinary [they / she]
    eyes: green
    pelt: chocolate torbie
    fur length: long
    parents: wolfsong and sunstride
    6 moons



Oh Stars above, just their luck - it was just one set of eyes they caught, but a small cluster formed around them nonetheless. Sunlitpaw's ears reclined, hovering over their head. They waited for something sharp, something telling them to work faster or harder or - do something better than they were, something more, because oh was Sunlitpaw capable of more, surely. A small voice reached her instead, much different than the deep masculine they were expecting. Sunlitpaw tilts her head back, before craning down. The tightness in their chest wanes meeting exuberant kitten eyes, followed swiftly by a tinge of ill-placed jealousy. Sunlitpaw missed being a kit, missed being free of... well, they didn't mind responsibilities. They missed being free of war, of hardship, of pain and bloodshed and loss. Was that all that this life was? Was that what Spotkit would be forced to grow up into, too? Sunlitpaw grimaces at the thought, but tries their best to hide such feelings with a meek smile. "Hey Spotkit," they murmur. Their paws detangle from the camp wall, gently pulling another thread of gorse toward them to motion toward the kit. "I just kinda... hold it up and... start weaving it in? Behind other bits, and then back forward, and do it over again." They liked it, keeping their paws busy in a way that didn't require their claws in flesh.

"I wanna be cool like you," and Sunlitpaw's ears flush pink in embarrassment. Cool was not a word they'd ever considered for themselves - Rivepaw and Featherpaw were the cool ones, Sunlitpaw was just... a let-down. "Oh, uh... thank you..." Sunlitpaw doesn't have it in them to correct them, doesn't want to cause a fuss. Scorchstreak's voice cuts the tentative silence the apprentice sat in, fur along her spine ridging upwards in nerves. That was a voice she expected to hear scolding from. Another compliment, instead, and Sunlitpaw carefully avoids looking the Lead Warrior in the eye as they turn their head toward her with a weary smile. An offer of food churns their stomach, releasing another rumble. Sunlitpaw sheepishly nods their head. Who were they to say no to someone like her? "If we have some to spare, I suppose." They murmur.

Rattleheart appears third, and Sunlitpaw begins to wonder if this is some kind of setup - they'd done nothing to deserve this kind of generosity, not when others needed so much more and had worked harder for it too. They would never dare vocalize such a challenging thought. Their eyes flicker to the rabbit Rattleheart had grabbed for themselves, eliciting another hunger pang. It was growing so hard to say no, Sunlitpaw wasn't sure if they could stomach watching someone eat in front of them. Their nervousness melts from their tightly knit brows slightly, a small but genuine smile on their lips toward the trio that surrounded them. "I think, um... a mouse sounds good, thank you." They didn't have the patience to defeather a bird, and something larger might make them sick. They certainly didn't need to upset Wolfsong further by throwing up.

Scorchstreak offers Sunlitpaw teaches Spotkit their work, while Rattleheart suggests they've done enough for the day. Sunlitpaw is discontent with both ideas, yet they'd do whatever was ordered of them. The apprentice rolls their shoulders with a deep inhale, nodding their head. One, and then the other. Work, and then rest. But... work first. "Is it like tunneling?" They roll their head back toward the wall, tipping their nose down at it. "Um, maintaining the camp wall, I mean. Do you have to... reinforce the tunnels at all like that?" Singedpaw never spoke of their training, and none of the rest of her siblings were tunnellers. Such a conversation was a welcome distraction from their own work, as well as turning the two warrior's minds elsewhere.

 
༄༄ Rattleheart’s pawsteps are as familiar as Scorchstreak’s own, and she turns to glance at her sister as she approaches. Rattleheart also offers options for the apprentice to eat, and Sunlitpaw says that they want a mouse. "Good choice," the calico murmurs, stalking off in the direction of the fresh-kill pile. She returns just as quickly as she’d left, though, and deposits a mouse at Sunlitpaw’s feet. The apprentice asks whether their work on the camp wall is comparable to tunneling, and at first it seems a ridiculous question.

"The tunnels have fewer thorns," she remarks with a shrug. She has never considered the camp’s walls to be in any way similar to the walls of the tunnels, but now that she does, she can see the comparison. Both offer protection at a cost—the risk of injury, whether from gorse thorns or a tunnel collapse, is not insignificant—but the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. "But… in a way, it’s similar. Maintaining the tunnels is more about packing dirt in." The question is an odd one to answer, unused to moor runners being interested in the tasks of tunnelers. She does have a degree of appreciation for the apprentice’s interest, though. Instinctually, her thoughts flit to Pinkpaw’s distaste for the tunnels, but she brushes it away. Comparing her apprentice to a moor runner’s apprentice is unfair. The tunnels are many times more frightening and difficult to navigate than the open moors, and she cannot blame Pinkpaw for disliking her position.