My birds of a kind ✶ Crowpaw

[Owlheart]

Owlpaw had been waiting for an ideal evening to ask Crowpaw to go looking for owls with her. She had said that she would go look for him but the tabby had found that she wanted it to be under the right conditions. Said conditions were hard to come by during Leaf-bear so when Newleaf rolled around, so did the right conditions. Owls would be around often by now right? A lot of baby birds are born around Newleaf so maybe there would be Owls around to look for food for their kin. That had risks but they weren't kits anymore, they could hold their own if on the unlikely chance things went wrong.

Something else had gnawed and twisted her thoughts into seeking this perfect condition, this was a date right? Owlpaw’s knowledge on the subject was limited but from what she had heard from more experienced Skyclanners in passing conversation it seemed to be meeting those conditions. Thinking about it for too long caused that weird fluttering feeling in her stomach to come back, so she tried to only think about it in small doses throughout the day.

Of course, Crowpaw had never explicitly said this was a date. She didn't know if that was something that he needed to explicitly state though. Usually Owlpaw would just go ask a clarifying question to know for sure but something held her back this time. The idea of Crowpaw clarifying that this wasn't in fact a date felt like a rejection of sorts, rejection of what she wasn't entirely sure, but it made her feel ill regardless. She would still want to go owl watching with him no matter what, she enjoyed his company and their slowly growing friendship. There was no question about the enjoyment she would have regardless but something just would feel rotten within her if that rejection had occurred.

No, there was no point in worrying about that. Tonight was going to be fun, Crowpaw said that he would like- no that he would love spending time with her, so this would go well, right? Shaking her head in a feeble attempt to get rid of her thoughts she felt her paws move without a conscious effort. The she-cat found herself wandering towards the fixation of her thoughts currently, stopping in front of him. Her maw moved without giving it a second thought, this of course meant that her flustered thoughts were vebalised.

“I-uh. Hello. Are you free tonight?” she paused then stared at Crowpaw expectantly. “For uh- the owl watching I mean. Are you free tonight for owl watching?” she felt the tip of her ears burn as she clarified what she meant. Why did her ears burn? it couldn't be from the sun, as it had started to set. Had she always felt this warm? it must just be because she wasn't used to the heat that had started to creep back with the change of weather.


@CROWPAW! ​

 

[CROWSIGHT]

The promise of owl watching was made, but it had been some time since then. He's been busy that much is true, but he wonders if Owlpaw had forgotten or she was just as busy as him. After all, very soon they would all be taking their own assessments to determine whether or not they would become warriors. Should everything go well, both he and Owlpaw would be warriors the next moon. Our names will change. It's exciting. The names he had so far were merely identifiers that were based on age. When he finally received his own warrior name, the name was meant to represent him best. I wonder what name Orangestar would give me. I hope it's something cool. He knows it is an honor to become a warrior and be given a name, but he's still a child who wants something cool. If he was called Crowfur he would be a bit disappointed, but would swallow his pride and take the name because Orangestar thought it best represented him. Anyhow, all he could do was wait. He had faith that she would come in time and fulfill their promise.

Dates were something he had no knowledge of. The boy hadn't asked about them because there was no real reason to. He was solely focused on his training and dates were not a thing that Silversmoke trained him for. Considering the lead warrior mostly taught him the art of combat it was safe to say it wasn't combat related, nor was it hunting related. He never heard someone say they would hunt for a date. As far as he knew, dates weren't a real thing. Now, while he didn't know what a date was or what qualified as one, he knew what love was. He'd seen it growing up with Bobbie and Blazestar. The pair inseparable and running off to who knows where. Seen Blazestar bring Bobbie prey and Bobbie press against him. Always touching in some capacity. He knew what flirting was due to Orchidpaw. Silversmoke was oddly protective back then. Part of him laughed after the ordeal because his mentor never looked more like his father. A man wanting his son to date those he deemed good enough.

If only he knew what a date was. Although, maybe it was for the best he didn't know that dates were something romantic. That it expressed interest in another that was beyond friendship. Poor Owlpaw asking for clarification would not be rejection considering he would ask her what even was a date to start. How much she is willing to tell him would greatly effect his answer. If she explained that a date was something cats did to know each other better then he would say without a heartbeat that it was a date. He enjoyed her company, the way she spoke, her love for birds, and the way she admitted her shortcomings. Why wouldn't he want to know her better? Perhaps, if she had heard him say it so directly would fluster her to no end.

Anyhow, a familiar orange pelt approaches him from the corner of his eye, which prompts him to look directly at Owlpaw. Lips curl into a small smile and interrupts her when she greets him with a wave, "Hello." It's nothing that would annoy her as he tilts his head, as if encouraging her to continue. "Yes, I'm free tonight." Hazel eyes stare back, puzzled why she seems to be out of sorts. Free for what specifically? It's as if she reads his mind when she answers his unspoken question. If there is one thing that annoys Crowpaw the most is when others don't get to the point. Despite the fact that she is flustered, he is pleased that she clarifies what exactly she is asking him. When owl watching is brought up he practically becomes another cat, happiness and excitement radiating from him. A fluffy black tail swishing side to side. The black tom's head nods frantically, "I am!" I was wondering when we'd do it. It's been awhile since we've said we'd do it.

Despite his excitement, his mind screams for answers. Crowpaw has always been too observant for his own good. Not knowing when he should keep his maw shut. "Is something wrong Owlpaw? You seem nervous," he mews while drawing closer to her (not helping her plight whatsoever). "If there's something on your mind we can talk about it instead? I'm not saying I wouldn't want to go owl watching, but there's plenty of owls out there. We can always go another day. There's only one Owlpaw though. I'd love to spend time with you no matter what we wind up doing." Did something go wrong in training? She said she was worried about her battle skills... Or maybe she got into a fight with another apprentice. The thought of someone laying paws on her angers him. Let's wait before we go off and fight some random apprentice.

‧₊˚✩彡 nothing compares to the fever dream

• — crowpaw / skyclan apprentice / masculine pronouns / 11 moons
  — undecided / single / open to flirting and crushes
  — long haired black smoke with hazel eyes with polydactyly
  — may powerplay minor harm / can powerplay healing
  — biography / @ on discord for plots
  — penned by velou

​

 

[Owlheart]

It shouldn't make her more flustered to see Crowpaw become so animated when the prospect of owl watching was brought up yet it does. Despite her frazzled mind trying to piece together how to move on from here she couldn't help but grin at his excitement, it was a soft thing, full of affection, much to her own lack of knowledge about that fact.

“Nervous?” Had she really been that noticeably off? Usually she was better at keeping her nerves under the surface of her usual exterior. Usually she wasn't battling feelings that she didn't know how to explain or much less comprehend. That burning sensation her ears grew more intense as Crowpaw moved closer. Despite the fact that her nerves were screaming that he was too close she couldn't will herself to move away. Owlpaw was stuck and deep down she doesn't think she would move away even if she could. There lies the issue, her usual sensibilities just jump ship as soon as she's around him again, instead that annoying, persistent fluttering feeling remained. This is not conducive for bird watching she realised in dismay, as much as she didn't want to have this discussion she knew that it was the obstacle in the way of something she very much wanted to do.

Right, he had asked her a question. She blinked, once, then twice, then three times as she tried to process what exactly he had said. Did he have any idea that he was making this turmoil of hers worse? Probably not, despite what she had originally thought she had come to realise- or rather hope- that Crowpaw wasn't that cruel.

“I wouldn't want to make us miss out on bird watching just because I'm nervous” she didn't mean to admit that she was in fact nervous but it was pretty obvious, what was the point in hiding that? Her eyes narrowed, trying to gleam something from the tom other than his sincerity. “Crowpaw…” she began then trailed off, trying to find the right words was hard.

Owlpaw wasn't used to being so out of her depth, speaking was something she was confident in, she truly believed that she could talk herself out of anything and yet she couldn't talk her way out of this. “Is this a date?” she blurted out the words before she allowed herself to keep it locked up any further. “When we organised this, it felt like a date. Not that I mind- in fact I wouldn't mind at all? I just don't know what one is supposed to do on a date so I guess I'm nervous about that.”

There, I said it. This wouldn't ruin our plans right? anxiety clawed her nerves, she couldn't keep her eyes away from the apprentice. Staring at him as she tried to understand his expressions, his words, anything he would give her she would gladly take at this point.​

 

[CROWSIGHT]

Wordlessly he nods. There isn't any reason to say anything more, however he would appreciate it if she answered yes or no. The fact that she only repeated the question and stared at him awhile, made him consider grabbing her and shaking her to spit out something. The only reason he had not was because while annoyed by her lack of confirmation, he did want to spend time with her. He'd been looking forward to it after all. In the end she isn't direct about it, but he is able to grasp that she indeed nervous. He is also able to discern that she expresses guilt if they skipped out on watching birds all because of her. Hazel eyes narrow, "That's stupid. You matter more than a bird. If we miss out that's fine. And who said you would make us miss out? What if I wanted to focus on you instead? That way I'm the reason we missed out on a lousy bird." I'm not going to haunt you or wish death on you if we couldn't go owl watching today. That's so silly.

Oh, he might be the death of her by the way he keeps going. He's just glad he hadn't scared her off yet or that she hissed and slapped him for his words. He's always known he was peculiar and wouldn't blame her if she too decided it was too much for her. When she says his name he can't help himself from asking "Yes?" And then she blurts out what's been on her mind. His eyes widen in shock as he listens to what he's been told. Once she's finished there's something he must do.

"Owlpaw... What's a date?"

In another universe this would be the moment where one would hear a record scratch. The black tom has listened to what she had said to him, but I'm not sure if I'm understanding it correctly. She probably feels disappointment that it isn't a date considering Crowpaw has no idea what a date even is. She may be screaming to herself for spewing her heart out to him. Her only saving grace is that he doesn't look away or even show an ounce of disgust. In fact, it seems that Crowpaw wants to know what a date is.

A black paw is brough to his lip, grazing his scar as hazel eyes look down in thought. Owlpaw says she doesn't mind, so it's a good thing? Maybe? I'll ask. She's nervous because she doesn't know what to on date, so does that mean you need to do something to, on a date? Do all apprentices know what a date is and I'm the only one who doesn't? The boy returns his gaze towards Owlpaw. "I'm not going to pretend I know what a date is, but how come you wouldn't mind? And, well... I have no clue what a date is, so I don't know what you're supposed to do on a date? Either. Are dates scary? Am I supposed to be nervous too?" If there was anything to take out of this is that he hasn't rejected her. Nor has he called her stupid for being nervous. All Crowpaw desires is to know what a date, what she means to ask is.

‧₊˚✩彡 nothing compares to the fever dream

• — crowpaw / skyclan apprentice / masculine pronouns / 11 moons
  — undecided / single / open to flirting and crushes
  — long haired black smoke with hazel eyes with polydactyly
  — may powerplay minor harm / can powerplay healing
  — biography / @ on discord for plots
  — penned by velou

​

 

[Owlheart]

For a split second, Owlpaw wished that the earth around her would split and take her away from this situation. Hearing that Crowpaw wouldn't mind if they ended up missing bird watching from this brought ease to her frayed nerves. Taming them like a cornered animal, almost. She should be taking away more from what he said but she was focusing too much on the fact that he wanted to focus on her, which was a blessing and a curse.

"Owlpaw... What's a date?"

Okay maybe once again she wished for the earth around her to split and take her away from this situation. It wasn't rejection, yet. This could be worked with, a part of her is disappointed yes but more so there is relief. She hadn't been turned away, he didn't look disgusted. What is a date? she herself, wasn't entirely sure what a date is. The tabby had heard dates be talked about by her peers but she was never going to reveal that she was eavesdropping by asking about it.

From her understanding, dates are meetings, usually they're under a romantic context, did they always have to be though? She wasn't sure, this would have to be something that she followed up on with someone who actually knows what a date is. Her interpretation would have to be enough, though it was a battle to gain the will to speak. What if once he realises what a date is he will then reject me? This was something that she was going to have to learn to accept, either way she gets to go see birds, she had to remind herself that.

“Date's aren't necessarily scary, I'm just nervous but you don't have to be” she quickly reassured him, the worst outcome would be if she scared the tom for life and he never went on a date because she taught him that they were scary. She skipped over the part of the question where he asked why she wouldn't mind. This was a problem for future Owlpaw, present Owlpaw was trying to figure out how to explain a date.

“A date- well from what I understand- a date is an outing or activity that you do with someone. It's uh, under a romantic context? I think? I'm not sure if there are non-romantic dates. I thought this was a romantic one” she was making things worse for future Owlpaw the more she spoke but she couldn't help but ramble.

She wondered if this is what dying feels like briefly, her heart was pounding against her ribcage. Her paws tugged at the ground below her, trying to keep herself preoccupied. That damned burning feeling was still present and the weird fluttering that made her kind of happy but kind of sick was ever present.

“I guess I wouldn't mind because it sounds kind of nice? I like you Crowpaw, I think you're cool and we both like birds so doing something…like that… while watching birds sounded nice.”

A realisation hit her extremely fast as she spoke. She liked Crowpaw, not just as a friend? She didn't really understand what that meant, it was stored away in the I need to ask someone about this later folder. Once again, this was a problem for Owlpaw in the future.​

 

[CROWSIGHT]

A sigh of relief leaves his maw when she reassures him that dates aren't something to be feared. Being nervous wasn't a requirement for whatever was a date. I guess you can be nervous about them, but you could feel other things too. The boy nods, unsure of what to say as a response. There's still too much I don't know.

"A date- well from what I understand- a date is an outing or activity that you do with someone... I thought this was a romantic one"

Revelation after revelations are being thrown his way. Her explanation of what a date is puzzling. He's left with more questions than answers for his own liking. However, she's just as new to this as he is. So a date is a romantic outing with someone? It makes sense. It would far more disturbing if she just said an outing because then he would question if he had multiple dates with his own mentor and was unaware of it. Using Silversmoke is a horrid example, but it's not like he had a big circle of cats he spoke with. Many of them were adults. Wouldn't a non-romantic date just be a hangout? The black tom remains silent, no doubt unnerving Owlpaw to no end. She quite literally rendered him speechless. It's only then that he remembers he should show he's listening and how he does so is by giving a slight nod.

The only references he had of romance were of Bobbie and Blazestar. There were others, but they weren't as prevalent as the deceased leader and Bobbie. It's safe to say he's not entirely clueless. Memories of cats snuggling against each other decide now is an excellent time to be recalled. As well as seeing mates mutter words of love towards another with kisses exchanged. It's difficult to ward off those memories while staring at Owlpaw. The thought of snuggling with her isn't horrid. Has she always been this pretty and I didn't see it before? We'd look nice together. As for expressing love in the form of words, it is difficult to imagine what he would even say. However, he thinks if it's her... Then he doesn't mind being a bumbling fool trying to scrape together something suave. As for kissing... It would be nice. And let's not unpack that right now she's talking. GET IT TOGETHER! Now, why does she like me?

His question is answered, and he feels fire shoot up his spine and spread throughout his body. No one thought Crowpaw was cool. Cherrypaw had called him weird and Lupinepaw called him selfish. Oddpaw said they liked him. As friends. Drowsypaw still cared about him. Actually worried about him. "Owlpaw... I don't know a lot about romance or dates or crushes or flirting, so I'll mess up things. A lot." Ah, his mouth moved again without his mind. The black tom blinks and tries to quickly get his maw and brain on the same page. "I'm going to be honest. I didn't think this was a romantic date. I didn't think you, or anyone would want to have one with me. Or even like me." Probably not the best thing to say, or the worst thing ever. However, he's out of his element. He's certain that no matter what he would end up this way.

Now, he's rambling. "When I think about you, I'm happy." It must be jarring for her that he suddenly decided to switch the topic of conversation, and even more devastating when she isn't given a chance to stop him. "I want to hear about your day. I could listen to you for hours. Even if it's about trees. Anything really. I want to know you better. If... You'll let me. And! We both like birds and I love that because I thought I could find feathers you like and give them to you." The burning sensation has worsened. Quite honestly he wonders how he isn't dead with how his heart is hammering against his ribcage.

Against all reason he draws closer so that the distance between them is a mere paw's length. Is my face red? "I like you too Owlpaw. I, uh, would love to go on a romantic? Date with you." Truthfully he has no idea what he's doing. No one has taught him any of this. All he can do is trust his own instincts and that alone is terrifying. Hazel eyes bashfully avert to the ground as black paws shift to relieve some of his nerves. He has no clue what possesses him in this moment to close the distance between them by rubbing his cheek against hers. "Is... This okay?"

‧₊˚✩彡 nothing compares to the fever dream

• — crowpaw / skyclan apprentice / masculine pronouns / 11 moons
  — undecided / single / open to flirting and crushes
  — long haired black smoke with hazel eyes with polydactyly
  — may powerplay minor harm / can powerplay healing
  — biography / @ on discord for plots
  — penned by velou

​

 

[Owlheart]

The realisation that she enjoyed Crowpaw’s company more than just as a friend was something that made the world spin just a little bit faster for Owlpaw. She wasn’t sure what to do with this information, crushes weren’t something that she had developed before, so she didn’t really know where to go with that. She had never asked if crushes make you feel like you’re going to die or catch fire, so she wasn’t sure if that was the cause of these weird feelings she was having. Neither had she ever heard anyone ever describe it as such, in her mind these were two separate issues. She had seen couples around camp, she had a grasp on what the idea of romance was, it was how she gathered what little information she had on what a date was.

Trying to think about herself and Crowpaw in those situations just made her heart pound harder, for a moment it was all she could hear. All she knew is that she wanted that, thinking about those scenarios was dizzying but exciting? His words had managed to cut through the loud beating of her heart, she braced herself, ready for some kind of rejection. She had ruined this nice friendship that they had hadn’t she? Maybe it had been for the best that she said this now, better to get this over with than let the feelings fester for more than it already had. Starting his reply with the fact that he doesn’t know much about this kind of thing did nothing to ease her nerves. It felt like he was leading up to telling her that he didn’t feel that way, which was fine, she could live with that, her body still tensed either way. Her golden eyes moved from looking at the tom to look at the ground, that was a better option right now. It would be easier to hide the disappointment if she wasn’t looking directly at him.

Hearing that he didn’t think that she, or anyone, would want to have a date with him made her open her mouth to give back some kind of retort. I like you, I think you’re great. Anyone would be lucky to date you. She didn’t speak though, she had a feeling that he wasn’t done talking and she didn’t want to interrupt him.

"When I think about you, I'm happy."

This caused her to look up from that nice patch of dirt and stone that she had been staring daggers into in anticipation. Her expression was clearer than anything she could say, her eyebrows knit in confusion, staring at Crowpaw like he had given her a riddle. Her usually wide eyes had a shimmer to them that indicated she was close to crying, she went to open her maw but closed it again. Each sentence in his ramblings chipped away at the defences she had started to build up in case of rejection. That fluttering feeling grew in intensity with each passing sentence, she was sure that he could feel the heat radiating from her at this close a distance. Hearing that confession that he liked her too was surely going to be the death of her, it was like everything came to a halt.

Right, she should say something. What could she even say to all of this? “I would like to know you better too, I also don’t really know much about romance so I don't really know what we do from here? I don't know what this makes us? If we're going on a romantic date and keep doing so in the future? I just know that I like you a lot Crowpaw, I'd like to get to know you and spend time with you-” She cut her ramblings short as the smoke moved closer than that paw length that distance that they had.

A light purr rumbled from her as Crowpaw rubbed his check against hers. Her ears dropped as she grew embarrassed at the reaction she was having, still, she returned the gesture, keeping that contact and rubbing her cheek against his. “Yeah, this is okay, it's nice. Is this okay for you?” she moved away to look at him, still keeping close, her purrs not yet dying down. “When I think about you I'm happy as well” she confessed with a small grin “I find it hard to relax but when I'm with you it's easier. I get this weird fluttering feeling though? and my heart feels like it's going to break out of my body but I don't mind that?”

She wasn't sure what to make of these feelings but she knew that she didn't care at this moment. Her tail lightly taps Crowpaws side as she rubs her cheek against his again “did you still want to go owl watching?” ​

 

[CROWSIGHT]

Ears flick from her words. The smoke remains silent, not knowing what to say. Something in him soared when he heard and felt her purr. Instincitively he knew that he had done something right. Even though his paws were rooted to the ground, it's as if his spirt jumped around and ran in circles. I want to hear more. His heart nearly stops when she reciprocates. Black fur stands on end before smoothing down, loud purrs of his own resound between them. He's so glad he can't see himself, certain without a shadow of a doubt his face was red. While his heart hammers away at his ribcage, the smoke tom makes the mistake of opening his maw and makes a bizarre sound that makes him wish an eagle came and took him away. "Y-y-yes, it's okay. I, really like it." Oh, how he wishes he didn't stutter. The fact that his loud purrs hadn't stopped while he rubbed against her made him feel like a fool. This never happened before! It's terrifying and thrilling all at once. Is this what it feels like?

And when she pulls away, not far mind you, he can't help feeling disappointment. Their purrs haven't died down one bit, he wants to close the distance between them yet he doesn't. How did he look? Did he look funny to her? After all, he was looking like a kit that was deprived of play time. A black tail swishes side to side from happiness as she speaks. "You too? I wonder how I'm not dead yet with how hard it's pounding, but if it's because of you I don't mind. And uhm, Owlpaw? I would like to go on more dates too. I don't know what we are exactly, the only thing that I can think of is mates. But... I'm not sure. Maybe we should ask someone who knows?" The boy is unsure if there's anything before becoming mates. It felt like the word was meant for grownups and of course the pair were going to become warriors soon, but he knows he'll still feel like a kid for awhile.

Who would I ask? The first cat that comes to mind is Fireflypaw, but it seems cruel to ask the older tom about romance when he isn't allowed to. Does it make him sad? He's pulled from his thoughts when his tail is tapped and orange fur rubs against his cheek. It's grounding. The voices in his head become silent. "Oh. Right. We were supposed to go owl watching." Truth be told he had forgotten about that because of what happened. A black tail shyly attempts to curl around hers, "I kind of want to keep doing this. If that's okay?" Maybe the owl left already.

‧₊˚✩彡 nothing compares to the fever dream

• — crowpaw / skyclan apprentice / masculine pronouns / 11 moons
  — undecided / single / open to flirting and crushes
  — long haired black smoke with hazel eyes with polydactyly
  — may powerplay minor harm / can powerplay healing
  — biography / @ on discord for plots
  — penned by velou

​