not bothered, not troubled | stargazing

[SNOWMASK]

The last couple days have been hectic to say the least. And while everyone has been vocal and emotional when it came to Pitchstar's untimely demise the molly found herself quiet. Silent. She did not have any emotion this way or that way. It was...unpleasant for him to have died in the circumstances that he had but she didn't find much sadness or rage in herself. Maybe it is because she didn't get to know him beyond some words and passing information. Maybe. The woman slips from her nest in the night and she stretches. Her tail flicks high before she sits and lifts her eyes up to the stars. They twinkle and shine brightly, and she thinks of Starclan. How she has heard so much negativity when it comes to them. Yet now, is not Chilled reliant on them to give them nine lives? If they don't trust the place of stars then why bother? "It's all so confusing." She mutters as she watches the heavenly bodies of the night time sky. But at least the night sounds are here. The sounds of frogs, crickets, even owls that hunt the night skies. It makes things less bleak and cold and she finally takes in a deep breath.

"I haven't been here long. But....allow Pitchstar to have a place in your ranks. To grant him the rest he never had when he was here despite everything." It is a gentle prayer. Sincere. But she still feels very much removed from the situation but she can have sympathy. She can understand lost and she equates it to how she felt when she lost her children. It is a devastating thing nd she dips her head as she continues to look at the stars.​

 

[Starlingheart]

Newly named Snowmask still had a lot to learn about their ways but still, despite her jealousy she is glad that Pitchstar had allowed her to stay. If she had another opportunity to get her mom back she would wish to be shown the same kindness. Though that was unlikely to happen anytime soon. Still, she could dream. She finds the newcomer sitting in camp, head tilted back to look at the sky like Starlingheart herself often does. She hears the prayer upon her lips and she closes her eyes, sending her own silent one to the sky before coming to stand next to her, green eyes thoughtful as she studies the older she cat for a second before turning her own gaze to the stars. "I-if youre if youre con-confused you can a-ask me anything" she informs her, her voice barely above a whisper. "I'm s-supposed to uh be the ex-expert or s-s-something" a small smile plays on the corners of her lips at her own little joke. She only convened with them once a month afterall.
​

 

[Ravenwatcher.]

So I walk alone down the darkest roads​

---

Shadowclanners always seemed to be against Starclan, they had once stripped all the lives of the cat they have blessed with nine lives and once more did the same to Pitchstar, though they had given him more of a chance, allowing him to come back thrice more but that eventful day Starclan had taken him away. Yet, she still had hope for them. Blue eyes drifting onto the forms on the little Starlingheart and the newly named Snowmask, the she-cat's white fur dtood out in the clear night sky and she blinked a bit before coming to stand near the two, her eyes drifting up in silence. "Its a beautiful night" was all she could say and she too sent a silent prayer, one in hopes to catch the cat who decided to take away Pitchstar from them too early and to give them the same pain as they did him. ​

"speak""Thoughts"​

 

[FERNDANCE]

Ferndance believed in StarClan. They may have wrought ShadowClan into a bitter place, but it was an odd comfort to know that one's soul would reside someplace else when their body was swallowed by the very earth they'd come from. Still, their rules had always been a bit silly to the ticked tabby. There weren't many of them, but who were the dead to approve or disapprove of what the living did? They'd had their chance to be the change they wanted to see in the world, it was no one's fault but their own that they'd lost that chance. She was silent as he approached the stargazing cats, their words muted in (seeming) awe of the sky that night. It was beautiful and it felt... something to know that Pitchstar was among such a dazzling spectacle. He'd been a guarded cat, bitter like the scent of a badger and she could only guess that he must've harboured some sort of resentment for the council he now sat among for what happened to the last leader. She wondered if their enemies were up there now too, if death had given them some enlightenment, or if they still wanted her dead.

"How brightly do you reckon he shines?" Her head slowly turned as she assessed the sky from left to right. "Pitchstar, I mean. I... haven't made up my mind yet." Would he want to be perceived among the fallen? Would his own opinions matter if StarClan hated him enough to snuff him out? A rare, pensive frown appeared on the ticked tabby's muzzle, her emerald gaze lost in the dark sky above.
​

 

[Halfshade]

"Expert now are we?" Her laugh is not unkind but amused, meant to tease and not critisize.
The talk of StarClan in the clan as of recently had been strained so it was almost nice seeing a discussion of it that had no hostility clinging to its edges. It had been a touchy topic since their first leader was taken in such a cruel and horrific way. She had only recently joined at the time, knew Briarstar as simply the cat in charge who changed her name from Catherine to Halfshade and she spent a good few days being unsure of it. Eventually it grew on her and she rather preferred it really, but her time spent with the shadow of a she-cat was fleeting; StarClan took her back with expedience and it almost felt as if Pitchstar too had not lingered long, though he'd left much more of an impression on her. A paw raised to her nose where the scar from his claw was still prominent; it was never going to go away but that was fine. It was charming in its own way. Ferndance's question earns a chuckle in reply.
"I promise you if Pitchstar got to choose his shine he would be the one without. That tom never liked the attention." The torbie falls quiet, uncertain for a moment before smiling, "I'm sure he's at peace. Our ancestors are supposedly up there yes?" She casts Starlingheart a light show of teeth as her smile brightens, "Silly as he was at times, everything he did he did for ShadowClan. We survived leaf-bare because of him and his decisions. I'm sure Briarstar was proud and welcomed him."
​

 

[MARROWPAW]

𓆈 ⠀ ── ⠀ like snowmask, in his most recent days, marrowpaw has been silent. pitchstar’s death had come as both a shock and not to the bicolored tom, but he’d be lying to say he wasn’t surprised. starclan had forsaken them long ago, and for that reason, he keeps his mouth firmly shut. what could he say? not much, not nowadays. in fact, it hardly felt as if he were there — hardly felt safe, hardly felt as though he belonged in a clan he’d robbed of its founder, a family he’d robbed of their mother. the boy lies a tail - length away from the newly named warrior. she speaks something akin to a prayer and he cannot help the way solar flare eyes lift towards the twinkling sky, startlingly clear against the murkiness of their swampland. would they listen? the thought is almost laughable, as much as he’d like to believe it.

starlingheart approaches, speaks of the stars in her wavering tone and he wants to ask, to blurt out what he’d never found the words to. how’s mom? is she okay? did she find dad? his throat clicks, is dad even there? maybe briarstar was happy up there then, bounding amongst the stars with amber. maybe pitchstar had joined her, joined them both. maybe he was happy — maybe, maybe, maybe. the growing tom cat lifts himself, shakes white forepaws out in front of him to dislodge spare mud and dirt that seeps between sharp toes, flexing his claws to dislodge the accumulated earth. as he does, halfshade reveals herself — and he snickers, comes up slowly alongside his sister to nudge her with a broad shoulder, “ s’posed to be. “ it’s a gentle tease, playful despite the trepidation he feels as it leaves the coarseness of his tongue.

the boy settles aside her, aside his clanmates, ignores the feeling of intrusion he feels — ignores the burn of judging eyes he knows is likely not even there. as the lead continues, though, he feels his gaze slowly drift from his sister to the stars above, squints at the beaming pinpoints above them all. briarstar welcomed him with open paws, he just knew it. marrowpaw lifts a lip, hooks a claw into long, yellowed teeth, picks at the remnants of lizard skin stuck aside his canine — and when he speaks, he does so with his maw wide open, words slurred and tongue wet, “ bet he smells better up ‘ere too.” said with a wistful grin, lopsided and wide. or maybe not.

BIKES N BONFIRES information visual

• MARROWPAW —————— marshland menace.
  m. he / him. apprentice of shadowclan, son of briarstar and amber. lanky black bicolor with ghost rosettes and sunburst orange eyes. inheriting his mothers sharp features, his fathers frame and his family’s trademark spiky fur, marrowpaw can be mistaken for nothing but true shadowclan. sly and brimming with false confidence, an objectively good - looking feline ; he stands a hair taller than most, and bearing a remarkable resemblance to both his aunt bone and late brother pitchstar in structure and coat. whip - like, long and coltish with legs lined with hard, wiry muscle beneath an ever - ruffled pelt, marrowpaw is wild, untamed in both looks and attitude, and ever self - assured.
  
  — bisexual, single. smells like rotting leaves and asphalt.
  — apprentice, voiced by skeet ulrich as billy loomis
  − eleven months old, mentored by shadetooth ;
  
  penned by antlers​
  
  
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[ROOSTERSTRUT]

❪ TAGS ❫ — Like many of his other clanmates, Roosterstrut too finds it difficult to rest. ShadowClan hasn't gotten a break, from severe starvation to conflict with ThunderClan and now Pitchstar's demise. Shock and sorrow had wracked the young warrior initially, and while such emotions still weigh heavy in his heart, he feels as if he's able to find solace in the company of his clanmates as well.

Pale green hues lift to silverpelt now, and before long, Roosterstrut murmurs, "It's so weird," A small flick of his tail. "Not having him around." As much of an enigma as he was, sometimes. It was so unfortunate how distrusting Pitchstar was, even more so after he took the helm of leadership. He had always been an older clanmate that Roosterstrut had looked up to as a youth. Now that he had led ShadowClan through the darkest era of its existence, he had departed from the realm of the living, embarking on a starlit journey to meet the ancestors.

He wonders if Goose is with him up there. Roosterstrut supposes he must be, and there is no doubt that StarClan is real after the events of the Great Battle, but... Sometimes he wishes he had that extra reassurance. ​