private "Only Everyone can judge me." (Ashpaw.)

[Thrushpaw]

Thrushpaw let out a sigh against the cold newleaf morning. So much seemed to happen so fast now that she had finally been made an apprentice. Her muscles ached and her paws were still muddy from her sparring session. She seemed unaware of others in the clearing, just taking a moment to catch her breath. After what felt like ages to her, she managed to find the will to continue on her way to the fresh-kill pile. It had been well earned, at least in her justifications and gingerly she grabbed a small trout from the pile. It didn't seem as high as she'd like but she knew from word of maw that many of RiverClan's warriors were still recovering from the battle. They had to recover and she desired secretly to go out on her own and try and catch something.
With another dramatic sigh, she set the fish between her forepaws and began to eat.
Her movements were decisive but shaky. It was clear that the girl was tired and with no-cat around to see it, she felt at ease at last in showing at least a minute amount of weakness.
After a few hungered bites, she licked her chops and drew a paw over her ears.


The newleaf sun had yet scarcely peaked on its course to the horizon and she already wanted to curl back into her nest but she adamantly refused. More than anything Thrushpaw had wanted to impress Stoatsplash and now it felt to her that every muscle screamed in protest.
Her eyes were distant, had she really contributed enough to earn this meal? She wondered, eyes looking blearily around the clearing. Unable to spot any gaze upon herself, she resigned to another bite of the fish, chewing tentatively.

Surely there was more that could be done but she knew now as she sagged into a more comfortable position that she'd pushed herself too hard. As good as she believed her intentions to be, she'd certainly overexerted to a degree that would make any venture her mind might conjure up much too difficult.
So far the apprentice hadn't really spoken to any of her fellow paws, feeling anxious, feeling like they'd know that she was foolhardy. It was a struggle that she could not yet comprehend existing only inside of her head.

With a clan so full of honorable and strong warriors, how could (I) she possibly believe that she could do less than the best? It was another pointless question, one inadverdently uttered out loud as a tired mind slipped in it's barriers to audible speech. At the moment though, the realization escaped her, she was simply too tired. With another sigh, she gave into her hunger, nabbing another bite off the trout, guitily.
@ashpaw!

 

[ashpaw!]

Ashpaw tilts her head, ginger tabby fur rustling in newlead wind, ears perked for sound. She follows it to Thrushpaw, sitting alone. Such a little girl — once more, Ashpaw finds herself wondering if she'd looked that little at four moons old. So very new to apprenticeship.

"Thrushpaw," the older apprentice says softly. She makes herself gentler as much as she can, lowering as she approaches, settling on the ground nearby ... hackles low, blinking slowly. "How're you doing, kid?"

She lets herself grin, nodding toward the fish — a good meal for a hardworking RiverClanner. "Earned that today, yeah? How's training been going? Stoatsplash must be a great mentor."

She purrs, hoping to comfort. She doesn't know what she's comforting, but something is off about Thrushpaw... maybe she's just off-kilter like the rest of them, left shell-shocked by the raid. But she looks so tired that Ashpaw has to wonder if that's really all. The older girl frowns as she notes the shaking ... the glassy eyes. A child shouldn't ... look like that. Is she sick?

Maybe it's training... Ash has seen Iciclepaw look like that, after hard days. Her face softens, brow furrowing with more concern.

"You've been pushing yourself pretty hard, huh...?"

​

—— " i found gold in the wreckage "

✦ ooc ✦ character information ✦ recent events

• ooc text goes here
  
  
• - 9 month old orange tabby with green eyes
  - apprenticed to lead warrior willowroot
  - crushing hard on iciclepaw
  - happy-go-lucky, mischievous, hardworking
  - very friendly, but defensive of riverclan!
  - got real fucked up as a kid so if she seems like she was fucked up as a kid, that's why
  - "speech"
• - KICKED FOX ASS
  - she is on a JOURNEY
  

​

 

[Thrushpaw]

Startled, Thrushpaw would flinch enough to drop the piece she'd been chewing onto the ground. In her completely exhausted daze, she'd failed to detect the presence of another. Vibrant was her fur and for a few moments of tired lucidity, the girl took in the much larger apprentice completely. Usually The older apprentices would have nothing to do with her.
She still had her kitfur even and no cool scars like most of them possessed. They didn't see her as an equal and she desperately craved that kind of recognition. To have the ginger she-cat put her entire focus on herself, made things feel floaty somehow.
"I-" She had to stop herself, collect thoughts before they could pile out in a mess as they often did.
"Yes. I want to make Stoatsplash proud. They're a fantastic mentor." The words rang hollow even if they were true. She was just so tired and hungry. They'd been out for hours today already and in all honesty it had felt like days. The brown and white molly always pushed herself hard because if she did then she was confident her fellow paws would acknowledge her.
Training? Admittedly it was going good, although she'd still been reluctant to swim in the cold water. Her pelt was dense and sleek but something about the cold stung her to her core.
Centering herself, she'd turn her weary gaze to the senior apprentice.
"It's been going well." I wish that more of the older apprentices were like you, that they'd talk to me. Words left unsaid but something about it implied in her gaze. Thrushpaw was not just tired, she was desperately lonely.

 

[Thrushpaw]

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