- Nov 10, 2022
- 31
- 4
- 8
Jasperglare was uncomfortable with the brutal tempest of raw emotions that were boiling inside him. It was all so powerful....The hatred, the betrayal.
The hurt.
It was like the wound had been torn open again as he had realized the reality of the day his mother died. The day his life took a turn for the worst.
His father not only abandoned them, he killed his mother....
He would never have learned of this treachery if Dandelionwish hadn't shown everyone those poisons. He had not believed fully in Starclan before, but he was convinced this was a message from them. A gift.
Dandelionwish was the messenger. Though he supposed..... The medicine cat in these clans WAS the messenger, right??
Oh, whatever. It wasn't important.
Or was it???
He was thinking too hard. He paced and he paced, out on the moors with energy he hadn't had in weeks.
His father was out there somewhere. He needed to kill him.
"What are you doing?"
He stopped. He looked behind him to see Spiderbloom. Ah..... His precious Lily. He and Spiderbloom had met, forming a bond over their misfortune, their pain. The world had turned it's back on them, and in the darkness they found each other's light.
"I'm plotting a murder." He said.
"Oh, the fun stuff." Spiderbloom replied.
"I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna find him-" He turned away to pace more. "AND I'LL RIP HIM APART!!!!" He roared.
"Nice, nice. Who are we talking about?" Spiderbloom asked, watching her former mate pace back and forth, wearing a rut in the already mushy snow.
"My father. He used those seeds- foxglove seeds- to kill my mother." Jasperglare explained. " I want to know why."
Spiderbloom blinked at him. Try as she might, she couldn't feel any sympathy for Jasperglare. She felt nothing but apathy... Towards someone she once loved dearly. Should she be ashamed?
"Let it go."
Jasperglare stopped in his tracks. He looked at her with wide, disbelieving eyes.
"What?"
"You can't do anything about it. You have a new family to look after. Let it go." Spiderbloom continued.
Jasperglare bore his teeth and flattened his ears in offense. "YOU WANT ME TO LET IT GO!? HE'S THE REASON MY LIFE TURNED TO SHIT!! NO, HE DOESN'T GET TO LIVE." He shouted turning to pace again. "HE DOESN'T GET TO LIVE HAPPILY WHILE I SUFFER."
"You don't even know where he is. You have more important things to worry about now. Let it go."
"ILL NEVER LET IT GO."
In one swift movement, Spiderbloom raised a paw with claws unsheathed and raked them across Jasperglare's cheek, digging them into his skin. Jasperglare, still scrawny from greencough, was easily knocked over into the snow.
"LET IT GO, JASPERGLARE. IT'S NOT IMPORTANT. YOU'RE A WINDCLAN CAT NOW, AND WINDCLAN NEEDS YOU." Spiderbloom shouted at him.
Spiderbloom never struck him before. It stunned him, made him wonder if he was in the wrong. Was he wrong for feeling this way? Should he really...Let it go?
.....And leave his mother's memory behind...? Forget his two little brothers...?
He shakily rose to his feet. He shot a glare at Spiderbloom. He was hurting differently now. She had never struck him.... Just as he had never struck her. She was different now, he realizes.
Spiderbloom isn't the Spiderlily he fell in love with. She wasn't his precious Lily anymore.
He couldn't blame her. They separated, but remained friends.... Neither having any love left to give. But even so.... He never even considered.... Hurting her.
And Spiderbloom felt nothing. She felt no regret, no pain. She felt absolutely nothing. She stared at Jasperglare's bewildered gaze with her own cold and emotionless stare. He would be happier if he let it go. Stop letting emotions fuel his actions.
Jasperglare didn't know what to do. He couldn't hit her back. He just couldn't. He could never. Even if they weren't mates, she was still a dear friend..... Wasn't she?
Wasn't he...?
The wave of betrayal hit him hard, and he began walking away. He said not a word to her as he headed back to camp. Spiderbloom watched him go, still feeling no remorse.
She had done nothing wrong, she simply dissuaded Jasperglare from doing something stupid. He had more important priorities than a revenge fantasy. If he couldn't see that, then that was his fault, not hers. She would not coddle his tantrum.
She began to lick the blood from her paw. It wouldn't do if it froze on there, now would it.