- Dec 1, 2022
- 29
- 3
- 1
TAKES PLACE TWO DAYS BEFORE THE MEETING ON 1/20
This thread deals with derealization and death, please be advised.
Times had gotten more desperate. She could see it in her brother's eyes as leafbare's chill began to creep over what had once been as warm as the sun's rays. It made her nervous, made her anxious to do something, anything, to make herself feel like less of a walking mouth.
Nightwillow didn't seem to be fairing any better, regardless of how much she had pushed his way and watched him choke down. She didn't know how much was being lost later due to stress causing him severe bouts of nausea. Yet, he seemed to be doing better today, pulling her along for a paired hunting patrol that would double as her training for the day. She was determined to keep herself aware, determined to keep herself in the moment and yet-
'If you just forgot about it all, you wouldn't feel hungry.'
'Its not like anyone would notice if you just fell asleep somewhere.'
The voices overlapped, the names intertwined until she wasn't sure whose voice she was hearing in her head. It had to be in her head, no one else was here, she checked, she kept checking. No one else but her and Nightwillow.
"Okay-Lilacpaw are you spacing out again?" Her head snaps in the tabby's direction, shaking fervently as she assures them that she had been listening this time. She had, she had the sentence ready to repeat to them..only for them to sigh and shake their head. "See what you can scent, if there's anything to be had." Came their raspy voice, issuing an order instead of their normal test to see if she really had been listening. It confuses her, its not their routine, but she ignores it, trying to do as told.
There's a lot of cold, and its an odd thing to consider as a scent, but chill itself seems to have an effect on scenting. She finds that she has to open her mouth slightly wider, tongue closer to her teeth as if to taste the trails to have any luck. There's something there though, faint and familiar, the musk of feathers, of the thunderpath and twoleg garbage. She doesn't remember the name, but she knows its prey. Nightwillow grunts in surprise as she slips past him, a trot kept low to the bottom of the marsh as she follows it, stumbling a bit in her wake.
'Do it, do it be fast-jump now just like they showed you!'
There's a flash of cloud colored wings and then she's leaping with all her might, snatching tail feathers between her teeth and reaching up to dig one paw haphazardly into a wing and the other into flesh. It’s a messy catch, horrible form but its food. She thumps to the ground, but something overlaps atop her landing. Fumbling with the actual kill, she turns with a bright smile towards her mentor, "Nightwillow look I-"
And he's on the ground. Her mentor is slumped in the mud like a ragdoll, slitted lids revealing glassy eyes.
"Nightwillow? Night-Hey!" She stumbles over, ignoring her catch as her paws push into his ribs, shaking his limp form to no avail. "Shit-Shit FUCK-NIGHTWILLOW WAKE UP!" Lilacpaw just keeps shaking, her own body following suit as her stomach turns. "Starling, Star-Starling will know what to do, Bonejaw had to have-someone has to know. I just, I just have to get them back to camp." She can feel her teeth chattering even though she's not cold, shifting on her feet as her eyes land on her catch. She couldn't just-Both. Both she'd take them both back.
Its hard, trying to haul Nightwillow's body up onto her back, trying to situate it so they wont fall. They're taller than her, paws dragging on the ground, but stars they feel so light. Her catch is in her maw, and then she's off, trying to keep as much pace as she can while preventing the warrior from slipping, but she makes it. Pidgeon spat out into the camp as she pushes through the briars.
"Please I need help!" She calls, voice shaking. "Please I need-"
"Don’t don’t bother me a-again."
Her sister's voice rings in her head like the hallowed horns of judgement day, making tears well up in her eyes as the nausea moves to her throat, heart hammering in her chest.
"We need Starlingheart."
This thread deals with derealization and death, please be advised.
Times had gotten more desperate. She could see it in her brother's eyes as leafbare's chill began to creep over what had once been as warm as the sun's rays. It made her nervous, made her anxious to do something, anything, to make herself feel like less of a walking mouth.
Nightwillow didn't seem to be fairing any better, regardless of how much she had pushed his way and watched him choke down. She didn't know how much was being lost later due to stress causing him severe bouts of nausea. Yet, he seemed to be doing better today, pulling her along for a paired hunting patrol that would double as her training for the day. She was determined to keep herself aware, determined to keep herself in the moment and yet-
'If you just forgot about it all, you wouldn't feel hungry.'
'Its not like anyone would notice if you just fell asleep somewhere.'
The voices overlapped, the names intertwined until she wasn't sure whose voice she was hearing in her head. It had to be in her head, no one else was here, she checked, she kept checking. No one else but her and Nightwillow.
"Okay-Lilacpaw are you spacing out again?" Her head snaps in the tabby's direction, shaking fervently as she assures them that she had been listening this time. She had, she had the sentence ready to repeat to them..only for them to sigh and shake their head. "See what you can scent, if there's anything to be had." Came their raspy voice, issuing an order instead of their normal test to see if she really had been listening. It confuses her, its not their routine, but she ignores it, trying to do as told.
There's a lot of cold, and its an odd thing to consider as a scent, but chill itself seems to have an effect on scenting. She finds that she has to open her mouth slightly wider, tongue closer to her teeth as if to taste the trails to have any luck. There's something there though, faint and familiar, the musk of feathers, of the thunderpath and twoleg garbage. She doesn't remember the name, but she knows its prey. Nightwillow grunts in surprise as she slips past him, a trot kept low to the bottom of the marsh as she follows it, stumbling a bit in her wake.
'Do it, do it be fast-jump now just like they showed you!'
There's a flash of cloud colored wings and then she's leaping with all her might, snatching tail feathers between her teeth and reaching up to dig one paw haphazardly into a wing and the other into flesh. It’s a messy catch, horrible form but its food. She thumps to the ground, but something overlaps atop her landing. Fumbling with the actual kill, she turns with a bright smile towards her mentor, "Nightwillow look I-"
And he's on the ground. Her mentor is slumped in the mud like a ragdoll, slitted lids revealing glassy eyes.
"Nightwillow? Night-Hey!" She stumbles over, ignoring her catch as her paws push into his ribs, shaking his limp form to no avail. "Shit-Shit FUCK-NIGHTWILLOW WAKE UP!" Lilacpaw just keeps shaking, her own body following suit as her stomach turns. "Starling, Star-Starling will know what to do, Bonejaw had to have-someone has to know. I just, I just have to get them back to camp." She can feel her teeth chattering even though she's not cold, shifting on her feet as her eyes land on her catch. She couldn't just-Both. Both she'd take them both back.
Its hard, trying to haul Nightwillow's body up onto her back, trying to situate it so they wont fall. They're taller than her, paws dragging on the ground, but stars they feel so light. Her catch is in her maw, and then she's off, trying to keep as much pace as she can while preventing the warrior from slipping, but she makes it. Pidgeon spat out into the camp as she pushes through the briars.
"Please I need help!" She calls, voice shaking. "Please I need-"
"Don’t don’t bother me a-again."
Her sister's voice rings in her head like the hallowed horns of judgement day, making tears well up in her eyes as the nausea moves to her throat, heart hammering in her chest.
"We need Starlingheart."
- - owowowowow
-
[Please ping @/Chérie if this character is needed, instead of this account]
Lilackit- LILACPAW
9 moons, closeted demigirl [currently uses she/her]
A willowy, longhaired chocolate marble tabby with a distinct ruffle of neck and chest fur that trails down her back and white markings, has pale/dull green eyes
Lilacpaw is currently a mirror to those around her, she should be considered a spineless, two-faced cat among her peers, and a rather useless cat to the clan by most adults. She tends to strive for positive attention from everyone, only to have it blow up in her face and spawn negative attention instead.
Has recently lost her mentor Nightwillow to starvation, is becoming increasingly unstable.
Speaks in #AD8AE1
