camp SORRY MAMA &. the truth

[ORANGEPAW.]

WE WERE PLAYING IN THE SAND​

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// cw for mention of death. not necessarily in this post but later on!

he has only been in the medicine cat den for a few days now but he's somewhat restless. he does as he's told and doesn't really go anywhere but he wants to. how is he supposed to find his mom if he's stuck in here? she might get lost in the territory, and seeing as orangepae has been in many places, he would need to help her get back to camp. the pain is eased at most, but it's still there and naggingly so. he tries to stand up on all fours but ultimately that does not work and he collapses into his neck. he's gotta be smart about this. many cats might say that's just not possible for orangepaw but he was certainly more smart than he let on. he pushes back up on his paws, making a note to not even use his broken leg at all. he doesn't even go far, just right outside the den and then he sits. the scent of the herbs is just overwhelming and he needs to ask someone something. luckily, two apprentices walk by just as he thinks about it.

"hey fallowpaw. hi sproutpaw. can... I ask you a big favor? please?"

his voice is soft and his smile is softer. his tail twitches for a moment before he just gestures to the camp entrance.

"I know camp can be really hard to find and stuff so if... when you guys go on patrols, can you keep an eye out for my ma, please? she's... she's gonna be back eventually and I told her I'd wait for her. I don't want her to get lost in the big forest, is all!"

he hopes they at least consider it. he won't be mad if they say no but he'd feel better if they did say yes.

// please wait for at least one of them to reply!! and again, cw for mention of death as it will be revealed that his mom isn't coming back !! @Sproutpaw @FALLOWPAW

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[Sproutberry]

Admittedly, Sproutpaw didn't know how to feel about Orangepaw. He wasn't much younger than himself, but still it felt like their worlds were two different things entirely. Where Sproutpaw had spent all of his life that he could remember within the clan, living and breathing their culture, Orangepaw had been found in the territory covered in blood and telling the story about how his mother had put him there, told him to wait. Of course they couldn't leave a kitten in the territory alone - even Sproutpaw wasn't that heartless - so he'd been taken back to camp, named Orangekit then and there, and thus had begun the process of learning about the code, learning about ThunderClan history and becoming an apprentice, and now they were here.

At least he wasn't a kittypet, born into a boring soft life then joining the clans on the promise of adventure and fun, breaking codes and making the rest of the clan - at times even the other clans - pay for their stupidity.

Despite all this, he doesn't really talk to Orangepaw, whether it be circumstances or if he truly deep down didn't like the other he didn't know why they didn't really talk, and he didn't care enough to try and change that either, so he'd been surprised when the younger apprentice came up to him and Fallowpaw as they walk by and a look of confusion settles on the apprentice's face as soon as the request leaves the other's maw. "Your mom?" He'd echo out, tail flicking behind him for a moment. He'd thought by the time Orangepaw became an apprentice he'd understand the truth - that she wasn't coming back, that she was probably dead - but it seemed as though he'd never been able to get the luxury of moving on. It was sad really.

"I'm pretty sure she's not coming back, think about it... do you not remember how you joined the clan?" Who's blood could it have been that Orangepaw had been covered in, why would a mother not come back for her kit at such a young age after promising to do so. If she hadn't come back by now then she was dead or a liar, plain and simple, and hopefully Orangepaw would be able to come to that conclusion without Sproutpaw having to spell it out for him.

AN ANTHEM OF DEATH ๑ SINGS OUT A CRY

• -- ic opinions ofc ~

• 

• ๑ SH chocolate tabby/lilac chimera w/low white, heterochromia, folded ears
  ๑ rarely talks, listens to conversations
  ๑ 9 moons old; ages the 20th every month
  ๑ bisexual biromantic ; interested in no one
  ๑ currently being mentored by Bigfang
  ๑ not easy to befriend/interact with; slow to anger, slow to calm
  ๑ "speech", thoughts, attacking
  ๑ easy in combat due to age
  ๑ peaceful powerplay allowed

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[FALLOWBITE]

ˏˋ*⁀➷ 　Fallowpaw doesn't worry over Orangepaw's injury. She can't. She needs to focus on herself, on her siblings... Not some idiotic tom who can't even climb a tree properly. She tries not to think of the sound of his bone snapping as he hit the ground, of what she could have done to save him. He's not her responsibility.

She tries not to think of the past at all, really. Living in the now is much more effective; she learned that lesson a long time ago.

It seems it's time for Orangepaw to learn, too. "You really are a mousebrain," she drawls, looking down at the crumpled form of the younger tom. He looks pitiful. He sounds pitiful, whining about his mom like a lost kit. She was like that too, once. Telling everyone about her mama who kept her safe, who was going to come back for her someday. She clung to the ghost of her mother's pelt long into her early apprenticeship. She stole away from camp in youth to search, and Orangepaw seems keen to do the same.

He's too trusting, asking them to keep an eye out for him. That's where they differ. She was always too independent to ask for help.

Her last memory of her mother is a snarling face looming over her, pinning her down. Spitting vile nonsense, claws poised to kill. Her last memory is of her sisters' bleeding faces, clawmarks trailing down their eyes in a horrible mirror image of a mother gone mad with grief. Her lip curls.

She doesn't know much about Orangepaw's arrival, not like Sproutpaw seems to. She never cared to ask - but she knows enough from her own. "Your ma -" she spits it like a curse, mocking and shrill. An cruel imitaiton of the cat before her, and a crueler imitation of her own youth. "Isn't comin' back for you. Got it through your thick head yet?" Harsh, leaving no room for question. Sproupaw may be keen to let him come to his own conclusion, but it is not. Its chin raises, voice rough. It's cruel, but it's necessary. He needs to learn someday. "Don'tcha think she woulda come by now if she really cared? She's prob'ly forgotten all about you - if the maggots haven't got to her yet." It's kinder, she tells herself, to let him down like this. Better to crush those hopes with words. Wherever his mother is, she's certain any kind of reunion won't be pretty.

‎‎┌── HERE IN THE FOREST, DARK AND DEEP ⁀➷ I OFFER YOU ETERNAL SLEEP ──┐‎

• 
  
• 
  
  

  "SPEECH"

• 
  FALLOWPAW ⁀➷ she / it, apprentice of thunderclan, eleven moons.
  ➳ a scarred, pointed brown and white molly with shaggy fur and golden eyes.
  ➳ standoffish and solitary, always seems to have a dark cloud hanging over its head.
  ➳ baying hound xx npc, littermate to antlerpaw & doepaw.
  ➳ peaceful and healing powerplay permitted / / underline and tag when attacking
  ➳ penned by SATURNID ↛ saturnids on discord, feel free to dm for plots.
  

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[Lightflower]

❝ it's gonna hurt for a bit of time ❞​

Lightflower overheard the particularly bitter words spat from Fallowpaw's mouth about Orangepaw's 'ma.' She nearly recoiled at the strength of vitriol she spewed. "Whoa, isn't that a bit harsh?" she spoke before thinking whether she should get involved. With a moment's hindsight... she probably shouldn't have.

She honestly didn't know much about any of the cats in front of her. She'd heard about Orangepaw's arrival, but she hadn't been speaking to most yet when that had occurred. And Fallowpaw was just a mystery to her. She heard various rumors around the grapevine about Sproutpaw, and had herself witnessed a biting comment or two.
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[ORANGEPAW.]

WE WERE PLAYING IN THE SAND​

---

there is a moment where he is hopeful. a long moment. one that doesn't really go away, until it seems clear enough that sproutpaw isn't going to try and find his mom. he can understand it. maybe he just didn't want to, and orangepaw wasn't much of a beggar and he wasn't going to get upset for him not wanting to. sometimes that just happens. he nods his head as he recalls how he joined thunderclan in the first place.

"yes, i do, mhm! but of course she will come back. she said she would and she's always kept her word. always."

but that's not good enough is it. it's not hard to see what the apprentice is trying to say to him, but fallowpaw makes it's self known and is not nearly as patient as sproutpaw. neither of them are nice about it but orangepaw can't truly see that. even when fallowpaw is screeching angrily, bitterly snapping it's jaws and telling him to get it into his apparently thick skull. his mom isn't coming back, it says. he wants to hold on to the hope that she is, and maybe... he will but right now he can see that that's not the best course of action here. he has to be logical. he has to realize it. fallowpaw's words ring to him. orangepaw's smile falters. it's not long but it's noticeable, and a shiver rattles him at his core. there was that feeling again. that thumping against his chest, the feeling that makes his breath ever so slightly ragged. he has to push it away. he doesn't like feeling like that.

"oh...okay. alright."

he closes his eyes just for a moment before his smile returns. it's not nearly as happy as his last but at least it's still there, right?

"it's okay, lightflower. uhm... thank you for being honest about it. i... understand what you're saying."

was it so wrong of him to want to hold on to the idea that she'd be back? guess maybe it was. it did nearly cost him his life. he twitches his ears with a sway of his tail, giving a nod and keeping his smile.

"sorry to bother the both of you about it."

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[THUNDERGLEAM]

She felt the harshness hissing, spitting from Fallowpaw- heard with the flick of a pale ear Sproutpaw's hard-worded attempt to sink the truth like fangs into Orangepaw's neck. Blinking bewildered, with some hurt sympathy, Thundergleam wove over like running water. No, no... StarClan would be unhappy, with this. Suffering would find root in Orangepaw's heart, and then what? He would drown in his tears, he would be consumed by it- no, no, no. It was no way to live. It was no way to prosper...

Pity danced in mallow-blossom eyes. No, she had to root out this suffering- though a smile persisted on Orangepaw's maw, she knew that the sadness, the pain writhing deep within him was an unacceptable thing that needed to be removed. She would reach out a paw... execute pain the way she was supposed to. And though she did not know for certain what she was supposed to do... she could make a guess, an attempt... with glimmering eyes, with shining spirit she could reach out...

"Orangepaw, let us find you a meal... and I shall bring you some flowers, later." The words hurried out, feather-soft and brushing against her moon-white fangs. "What is your favourite prey? I shall fetch it for you." ​

penned by pin ☾​