pafp TEAR DROPS // apology

[BASILPAW]

He had messed up hadn't he?. Pipit had left the medicine cat den looking nothing but upset. Basilpaw had done something wrong, hadn't he?. Did...did Pipit hate him now?. Just the thought of that almost made him cry. Basilpaw had been sad all day until a plan had sparked up inside of him!. The kit jumped up on his paws before he rushed back inside the apprentice den to head to his nest and picked up some very, very much dead bugs he had in his nest. He had made sure to collect them before the cold had frozen the ground over!. Picking up as many he could in his mouth the grey pelted kit run back outside and went on a search for Pipit. Once he find them would run himself up to them and almost stumbled over his paws in the process. He would skided to a halt in front of them and dropt the half rotten bugs in front of the dark pelted tom's paws. Looking up he would be quick to start speaking.

" Pipit!, i give this bugs to you!. That way you can tell the whole clan that you're the best bug hunter this clan has ever seen! and then everyone will get to see how cool and amazing you're!, because you're not stupid!. I don't think so!. I think you're the smartest one in this entier clan!, so much that everyone should be jealous of you! and, and i don't mind you talking!. I can talk a little bit to much sometimes too but that's fine!. I love hearing you talk because you always have something cool or interesting to say!. So...so!! he had to pause, being out of breath, and while he was grasping to breath in new air through his lungs tears started to appear up inside of his eyes!. No...no,no,no!! he couldn't cry he had to smile, always.

Sniffling, Basilpaw brought a forepaw up to his face to wipe the tears away from his eyes before they even could fall but it was hard...so so very hard because they really wanted to leak out from his eyes!. " Please, please don't hate me...." he choked over his words, his voice trembling. He hadn't meant to hurt them he had just wanted to look all cool in front of them!, to impress them because he wanted to be just like them!. He would make sure to never hurt Pipit's feelings again he pinky swore on it!, so...so, forgive me...

// @pipit !! /FONT]



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[pipitclaw !!]

It's more or less forgotten, holding very little stake in the opinions of his youngers. Pipit wanders into camp with a toad hung in his jaws and he cannot say he enjoys the sensation of the slimy creature against his tongue but it is food... and it is supposedly tasty enough to be worth eating. He shrugged at the suggestion, he'd mistaken it for something far more appetizing until it had croaked a death song when he'd landed on it. Best to feed someone, even if he didn't have any intention of consuming it himself.

Uncharacteristically quiet perhaps, he hadn't had a lot of gab to give on the way home, skirting through the thorny ShadowClan grotto with only the fresh-kill pile in mind. Maybe he could find Lilacfur and bother her with his feelings... she was the soft type. Wasn't like he'd go to daddy dearest to sob about his reputation as the village idiot.

But the sound of a familiar, squeaky young voice behind him summons the tom's attentions. He turns to find his little shadow standing there with wide, near-watery eyes. Huh? He tilts his head curiously, worried as he picks up fire-light eyes to search for who might've upset his young friend but... instead he begins to grovel. Bugs form a tiny pile near his feet and the chimera is left slack jawed by the tangential word flood of Basilpaw.

He talks so fast he hardly catches some of it. The best bug hunter? The smartest one in the clan? Something cool and interesting to say?

"Woahhhh woah! Small fry settle down," he urges, lifting a paw to set on the young tom's head and ease his blubbering. A sniffle-voiced continuation begs not to be hated and the chimera is left completely flummoxed. "Basilpaw," he cries, surprised and horrified to be the cause of such dismay.

"Breathe a second, tiny champion, it's alright!" Ah hell, this kid's gonna burst into tears and everyone's gonna come yell at him for making the young tom cry. "I don't hate you... come on stop sniveling... It's fine. You really thought you were gonna set me off that easy kid?"

He withdraws his paw gently before puffing out his chest in a show of pride and resilience, "I'm fine, I'm fine," he reassures, something he's parroted in many occasions (several of such he has not, in fact, been fine in), "I appreciate all the compliments buddy, I think you're pretty cool too... and these bugs are really neat- I'd hate to take them from you over a misunderstanding. We're still best pals, alright?"​

 

[SHARPSHADOW]

Sharpshadow would hate being " best pals " with Basilpaw. They could be on seperate patrols and he thinks he would still hear the apprentice's screaming, but, uh, it wasn't like this apology was for her or anything, so she supposes it doesn't matter what she thinks... Clearly, she's missing context too. The heap of bugs ( Are they dead? What was the point, even?? ) he shoves in Pipitclaw's face isn't exactly an everyday conversation starter. Basilpaw's eyes shine with some kind of desperation Sharpshadow felt a tad relatable. But he'd hate to relate to anything Basilpaw, and so he ignores that.

It's sweet, the both of them. Besides Pipitclaw being given one of the most useless gifts imagineable, and the so - charitable - it - must - be - fake declarations from Basilpaw. Not like the smartest in Shadowclan was a very high bar, but he'd hesitate to designate it to Pipitclaw.

...And she realizes she's caring about all of these things that neither of them could care less about. And she's the kind of asshole no - fun ShadowClanner that Chilledstar wants them all to... stop being. She should say something nice. " No one hates you, Basilpaw. " She almost adds except me, because that'd be pretty funny. ...But it'd also be a lie.

with myself i must play in this game of charades ( ♱ ) cause there's no one to speak to

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  SHARPSHADOW: he / she , no pref , dislikes gender neutral language ; fine with gendered terms ; 20 moons old as of 2.13.24 ; ages every 8th
  

  dark smoke feline that stands at an above average height. Easily identifiable by her namesake – an unruly mat of fur, destined to be cluttered by inconsistencies between chimera halves. Burdened with a broken tail, often lying dead behind her in the dirt.

  Anxious, antisocial, paranoid. Sharpshadow has not known peace for a single time in his life, and lives anticipating inevitable dangers to the detriment of herself and others.
  heavy ic opinions! he's irrational and mean </3

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[lilacfur]

Now that Pipitclaw had officially earned his place among the warriors den, the anxieties she had about her nephew fitting in had finally fallen from her shoulders. To some he may still be an outsider, there wasn't a single Clan under the sky that wouldn't have at least one cat that held pure Clan snobbery, but he was a warrior. A ShadowClan warrior trained by one she considered a great role model to go off of.

Despite the recent changes (as slow as they were) to ShadowClan's life of attempting to overcome their trials in trusting one another and caring for everyone as a Clan and not just as allies, enough had slipped through the cracks that she could tell were taking a toll on Pipitclaw. ShadowClan's usual assumptions that cats that knew how to make others laugh or have fun meant they were unlikely skilled in anything else had found its target in the smoke-dusted tom.

Since that day he stormed from the medicine den she had kept a close eye on their Clan, ready to defend her little nephew at any moment. Ready to spout praises until she was blue in the muzzle! Because by StarClan dammit she did a good job refining him into a warrior and any insult to him was equal to striking her as well.

"I've been there." Lilacfur hummed beside her fellow lead. She doesn't seem to want to elaborate, though. Gifting bugs to a friend? Begging for forgiveness? Hating someone? Being hated? Might be all the above! "How do you manage to find bugs in leafbare? Hope that means we're getting an early greenleaf."​

[ i need the clouds to cover me ]​

 

[BASILPAW]

Basilpaw did felt a bit comforted by the paw that got rested on top of his head while fighting to keep the tears away because he knew nobody liked a crybaby. That was why he always tried not to cry...no matter what!. Trying to calm himself down listen to what the newly promoted warrior had to say but it was not until he got ensured that Big Fry not in fact hated him that the apprentice really could stop with his sniveling. Now he looked up instead to stare with wide puppy-looking eyes at them. " Really?, like really really really?." he repeated and then blinked as he was being asked if he really thought this would have been the end of their friendship. He nodded his head.

Cool. Pipitclaw thought he was cool!. That started to make him shine up again but it was not until he heared Big Fry say they where best pals that he really started to beam up like a sun, all his sadness and tears vanished with a blink of an eye. " Yeah!! we totally are like the best of pals forever and ever!. and it's fine you can keep the bugs!. They where very importand to me when i was in the nursery. Like they where my first friends i ever had!. I could talk with them about anything!. I've you now though and Snowpaw so i don't need them anymore!. So you should have them as a symbol over our friendship!." and just like that he was back to his typical self again as he grinned widely up at the warrior beyond happy over that they two still were friends!.

Suddenly Sharpshadow was there and Basilpaw titled his head to the side as he started at them, ensuring him that nobody in this clan hated him. Big words for sure over something that couldn't be for certain, right?. Big words that probably shouldn't have been feeded into the mind of someone like Basilpaw. " Yeah right!, how can anyone hate someone like me, right?." He grinned at Sharshadow before he looked back to Pipitclaw. Because he was so likable wasn't he?. His gaze then find Lilacfur who had decided to join as well. " Oh i didn't!. Some of them i picked before the snow fell and the rest...i've had them since my time in the nursery!." he announced proudly as he puffed out his chest, like that was something worthy to win a reward for and maybe a pat on his head to be praised over!. He had always wanted that....



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[CATERPILLARFUZZ.]

I'M IN THE TREES, I'M IN THE BREEZE​

---

caterpillarpaw didn't hate anyone so, in a way, she guessed she couldn't quite understand how anyone could hate basilpaw either. though with a bit of thought, basilpaw was jumping to conclusions. pipit didn't hate him, at all, he was just being overdramatic and he assumed so. her ears twitched as she gently rubbed against lilacfur, being sure to have steady footing, nose twitching as gazed towards basilpaw. surely if she could see, the smile.on his face would have made her a bit uneasy. she likes happy cats but this was a bit much. perhaps it was because siltcloud had warped her thinking enough that she felt he had ulterior motive, somewhere in the back of her mind. logically, she knows he's young and younger cats are happier and more naive. but illogically...

"you... kept bugs around for the entire leafbare... for this reason?"

she's not scared of bugs, really, but she also doesn't get the appeal. the sounded gross. and felt and smelled weird. but who was she to judge, hm?

​

 

[pipitclaw !!]

The crowd he'd been worried about had certainly gathered... and by the grace of Silverpelt not a single one of them thought to blame Pipit for this whole mess. If his pride would permit him, he would've completely deflated with relief. Sharpshadow is still something of an enigma to him... never quite sure what direction he'll go with his short replies and terse commentary but today, at least, it is somewhat positive. Turning aurum sights to Basilpaw as the boy all but leaps out of his pelt with renewed joy for life, the chimera's eyes crinkle at their edges where an easy smile sits on his face in reassurance.

"'Course I mean it, you ninny," he chuffs. He is distinctly aware of Lilacfur brushing up against a pile of shadowy fur to murmur something but he doesn't bother to pay her much mind, opting to listen out for the answer to the question instead. His tiny compatriot insists on the giving of the bugs, explaining their value, their meaning.

If this is anything like being a father, I will never have kits, he thinks to himself, scanning the carcasses he is being handed as a 'gift' of friendship. Skunktail might've actually been the luckiest tom alive to have avoided these kind of shenanigans from his now grown-up sons. There had been three of them, three times the gross presents. Sorry mom.

Placing his pads delicately over the tiny shells, the chimera pulls them closer in acceptance, "Ah... thanks kid. I will make sure to keep them safe," and though he doesn't agree they are worth holding onto for one's entire life, he would not dare to break a promise.​