THE ANTHROPOCENE | valleysong

[CYGNET'S CRY]

"I'm sorry."

Were Cygnet's Cry's first words when his voice returned to him, as feeble strength diluted into flowing blood and pumping vein, and one eye fluttered open. Like water, his thew had slowly flowed and ebbed into him. Nausea still swam along his head, and the crown of convalescence stood heavy upon him now. Still, he managed. Wading just above the blackness, he managed. Moonlight flitted through the cracks of a makeshift den, and though the brilliance proved meager within the knoll of a marshland tree, it was like a puissance recuperating and pooling upon the earthly floor. The moon, ever his steady arrow and his rhythmic steer. The smoke point rested his body in the shadows, embraced in the veils of gloom that shied away from the power of night. Glittering blue eye shone in the darkness, lone jewel of the murk. The rogue lifted his head upwards, looking at the half-toned tom who looked so much like the moon, as though he were the sea that such brightness wilted on the surface of. He stood steadfast as a chaperone, though Cygnet had always seen him more of a knight than anything. Still, the sheer pity that must have been inflicted on him would bedevil any good feline. "I... I shouldn't have come here."

@Valleysong ​

 

[Valleysong]

It had been a few hours now and the amount of worry prickling at paw tip was overwhelming. Though still, the figure sat outside the makeshift den waiting. Oh so patiently waiting for something, some sort of movement and knowledge that he’d be okay. Starlingheart had said he would live but still some part of the older warrior feared for the worst. This idiot had tried to fight a fox on his own and lost his tail because of it, for what? What was the reason? Other than being stupid and a hero like he always seemed to be. Valleysong saw him as such though, a hero. Cygnets’ Cry had been their hero for as long as they could remember. As long as they have been in each others life and he didnt know what he’d do without the other.

Then there was a voice in the makeshift knotted den and this had the tortie tomcat on his paws in an instant. Valleysong peaked through the branches before slipping inside and this whole part of him wanted to bury his face into seal fur. To praise the beings above he was okay and apologizing like an idiot. He had to force his paws to stay in place and he swallowed thickly for a moment, watching the bigger tomcat as he met his blue gaze with a singular one.

His fur bristled slightly at his words and he shook his head quickly, “Dont be sorry, you havent done anything wrong” Valleysong quipped back in his rather aggravated tone but it was more out of worry than actual anger.

“Ive been the one who has been bringing you around here, you were there cause of me and now youre hurt and can’t even stay in camp” Valleysong found himself getting angrier and riled up with his own words and thoughts, his tail furiously lashed behind him and he adverted his gaze down. He wanted to be by his side, he wanted to see him all these moons later and they had gone for a coupe of years now of sneaking around. Everything came to light eventually anyway.

Valleysong scrunched up his face in distaste before then approaching beside the other, settling down beside him quietly. He seemed to want to do something but in true Valleysong fashion he was keeping his thoughts and feelings to himself. Despite he wore them on his face like a mask and he was clearly worried, but yet so thankful. Cygnet was okay and he was here, that’s all that mattered and they got to spend more time together anyway too, “‘I wanted you to come here- I’ve wanted nothing more than to share a den with you again” He spoke softly, his tone sour but he was trying his best to communicate his feelings. Something he’d always struggled with even as a younger cat, social situations were not his best friend.

Blue eyes kept downward before the fluffy tortie cat moved to scoot closer to Cygent and pressed his muzzle to his shoulder, “I dont regret anything- i really dont”

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[CYGNET'S CRY]

Cygnet's Cry's ears folded back, as though shame burned in him through the lit match of his own regrets, as though paper-thin fur would burst and immolate his doings. It should have been nothing new, for the feline so singed by his own regrets that he allowed it to rest along his laurels and end upon his tongue. This was something much different, a flame much more ravenous than that of the parading nomad's soul. He had almost lost himself, he had almost subjected Valleysong to grief's clutched. Suddenly taken aback by his companion's bristled hackles and snappish tone, the smoke point hung his head low, a nomad inundated with the unspeakable sensation of dishonor. Your ire is deserved. Cygnet's Cry reasoned inwardly, the thought curled up like a dying flower. Upon the continuation of speech, it seemed moreso that Valleysong had been furious at himself, like the half-toned tom had been set ablaze by an opprobrium. It made sense to the rogue, as much as he would hate to admit it. Valleysong had much more at stake than he. He risked the opinions of his clanmates, the chance at guaranteed shelter and food supply, adoration from those he loved... And yet, Valleysong had still saved him. You are better than your kin. I would say you don't deserve them, but they do not deserve you.

"Ah, but..." Rough-hewn voice softened just this once, like torrid flame had snuffed out all the edges and kinks within his imperfect skeleton, and left him pitifully barren. Straightened out into mere vertices of the man he once was, Cygnet's Cry submitted to the mortifying ordeal of being known, being perceived, baring oneself to the open light. If the light were so gracious enough, perhaps it could absolve him of his rue. "I don't mind staying here. Not if it's with you." Pained smile lined the edges of angular features, though even the mere act of showing physical gratitude stung as sulfurous bane, as a punishment for allowing himself the grace of love. But he did not allow his regret to take hold of him. Not this time, as he pushed back the bile that threatened to crawl through his throat. "I... I don't regret it either. I got to see you again. Well... I'm sure your fancy Clan friends can fix me up." His one good eye shot a glance at his backside, tattered with flimsy cobwebs soaking up the sanguine, unabashed in their consumption - so much so that they had turned pure and fragile whites into deep reds. Though the injury had incapacitated him greatly, he had lived. He still breathed and he still talked. For a rogue, that was all one could ask for.

"I can live without my tail. I can't live without you."

( THIS IS SO LATE IM SO SORRY )​

 

[Valleysong]

Then soft tone from the seal point had the tortie flicking back pointed ears and a frown danced across a half-white face. Sure Valleysong was not happy with the other for risking so much for something so silly, but he was only more worried for his health and safety. Worried for him in general, all the time it seemed as of late. Since Cygnet came to the clan he’d been constantly thinking of him and if he was okay. It was maddening and made him sound so soft, so stupid. The patch cat huffed slightly at him and turned his head away as he was terrible at eye contact in serious moments. This felt like a serious moment at least and it made him fidget slightly.

Then blue hues met missing and blue with roundness added to them- he didnt mind it here? Valleysong would’ve assumed he was miserable in the time he spent in Starlinghearts’ den. Though the next following words had the half-white cat flaming under his thick coat. Valleysong bristleds slightly but it was only out of his own flustered nature, not due to anger or discomfort. “[color=#8b534]Youre sappy, you know that?[/color]” He huffed in response but it wasnt an objection and more of a stating the obvious in a way. He didnt know how to respond to it really and it made his stomach do flips, his chest ache. The tortie swallowed thickly and adverted his gaze down once more, towards Cygnets’ now missing tail.

Valleysong snorted at the ‘fancy Clan’ comment and nodded, “Starlingheart will be able to help im sure, shes quite good at what she does” He assured him softly his tone less sour and more on the quiet side. The other lived through worse he was sure, but Valleysong was just glad to be able to still hear his voice and his sappy words.

The dark tortie cat then lashed his tail furiously, his pelt felt like it was on fire at this point. Truly like the patches of orange had come to life across his body at the seal points next set of words. I can’t live without you echoed through Valleysongs head, and the tom finally looked him in the face again. Ears back against his skull and eyes round- he couldnt be serious? What made him so special? Suppose Valleysong had always seen himself as too irate for someone to say these things to him, but yet Cygnet spoke them like it was nothing but casual conversation.

The tortie then lifted a paw to place it on his face with a small snort at him, “I dont think id be able to go on without you either” He admitted softly and retracted his paw, before moving to lean into the seal point comfortably. Dare Valleysong say he let a small pour rumble in his chest, albeit rusty and unused but he truly tried, “But dont go around trying to save me all the time, i wont forgive you if you get yourself killed” He lashed his tail at the seal point with a small grumble of other words.

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[CYGNET'S CRY]

A snort of amusement escaped Cygnet's Cry's mouth, though the heat of vulnerability had bloomed beneath his face and his fur, like a great garth of florets and weeds alike. Sappy was hardly a word one could ever use to describe the smoke-hued seal point. Descriptors such as 'unkind,' 'unfeelings,' and 'undeserving' seemed more apt for the man who guarded his heart within his own two palms. Even as this 'Starlingheart' mended him beyond the damage that the beast had wrought, there still existed a peach-pit of the pity afforded to him, as if too-sweet sugar that honeyed and rotted at his insides. He did not want to be looked at with the cloying falsehood of compassion that the clan cats draped upon his eyes. They had healed him, left him alone to recover, but had never let him in. It was better that way, so that he would not grow attached as a parasite to those wasting their herbs and cobwebs on him. He wondered why fate had made him and Valleysong born into two different roles, the knight and the wanderer looking inwards, as though he were a rogue beast never blessed nor given such luxuries. Valley was always so kind... were the rest of his ilk that way as well? He refused to believe it, refused to be wrong of all things, but the nagging thistle in his throat simply persisted.

Soft smile, unfamiliar to the creases and the downturns of gaunt countenance of the nomad, creased at the ends of swan's downy hues. If he had a tail, he would surely be flicking it along the ground. Valleysong's purr resounded within keen ears, though it did not sound as a thunderous boom, but rather the cry of precocious morning and a chance at a new day. In that moment, he could not stand to be bed-bound, as though crossed limbs would soon uncoil, and the tangle within his heart would surely become free of its own irons. Not yet, the ever-deigning voice of his own misfortune beckoned. [iNot while I cannot run.[/i] "You should run away with me. I'm serious this time. There is another world out there, far bigger than what you can see in the marshes." Gunmetal-grey eye sparkled at the thought of shedding the chains of his own wounds, as if a crater had been repaired simply with the light of endearment, but he could not see a future without Valleysong. Could he see it too? If he did not come with him in this moment, would this be their last meeting? He hated to conjure such grim notions.​

 

[Valleysong]

I’m serious this time.

Run away with me.

Suddenly its moons earlier in their lives, suddenly everything around them was not holding the worth it once had. Back when the clans first formed and Valleysong had padded after some tomcat who wished to join them. Back when the same question had been offered again and again, and he’d grown uncertain every time asked. Even in times of joking, there was always a tone of seriousness behind it all. Always a free notion of whenever possible; he could run away and have some where to go.

He knew that. He has always known that. That if Shadowclan ever went south or things shifted in time, they’d be able to get away safely and find a seal-pointed face to greet him. Even when they had been apart, even when they fought, even when that silly blue tabby tomcat stepped in their way. Cygnet hadn’t wavered. Hadn’t shied away from him, never treated him like a lesser than. He had always been this toms’ equal in more ways than one and the young tortie warrior flicked back ears.

Their kit was grown now, almost a warrior, no longer needing them and they had clung onto the hope one day they might. Though they would have their own life, they were safe and well fed here in the clans and- Valleysong felt his face tighten slightly as tears threatened his rather gruff features. They didnt need him. The tortie cat adverted blue hues downward to avoid staring into the depths of their companions cause they would surely burst or crumble.

Valleysong had never been good at being close to others. Always standing strong and against the world as if it was just him versus it. Born into a world of horrors, trash and more cats than should be in one room- he’d always fought alone. Always did everything alone until one dat a stupid point cat popped up and never left. Even after many attempts to make him go- he persisted. Suppose he still didnt understand what was so important about him, what made him matter so much to this cat but yet- yet there was contemplation. There was hesitation and wavering thoughts behind blue eyes as Valleysong truly seemed to consider the option.

“You know- i only joined the clans for Quail and because at the time i thought it was best for the kits i was gonna bring into this world” Valleysong spoke softly, opening the shell they kept entrapped around their heart just a little to let the tomcat in. To allow themselves to trust and feel for once other than the anger and hostility they normal harbored or wore on half-white face, “But now theyre grown- theyre healthy and happy- Quails gone and yet” Blue hues moved from were they had been to a one-eyed face. A face he’d come to think of first thing in the morning, their meetings yearned for more frequency and the need to share nests once more had grown strong and stronger in recent months. Stupid, stupid tomcats.

“You were there through it all, all the long nights and months of insanity that is the clans even if you only heard of it through my mouth” Valleysong sounded as if they were listing reasons, if they were trying to justify their actions even if they felt they needed no justification. He was a grown cat, he didnt have to be here anymore. Yet was it worth it? This fleeting feeling in his chest ever time he thought of Cygnet? The rush of heat at the words he spoke so easily?

Tortie paws pawed at the ground in a rare show of Valleysongs’ wavering feelings and then a soft breath left the cat before they nodded. Then nodded again before giving this rarity of a smile, one that was mischievous and playful almost, “I dont know who else id spend my days with other than you- you mean so much to me Cygnets’ Cry” Then he moved to press his forehead against the seal-points cheek, hiding this inflamed face as they couldnt look at him for this next part. Something he never thought he’d say and mean, something that had only been uttered his kit a handful of times.

“I love you, you big mouse-brain, don’t see that? Of course ill go with you, ill really, actually go”

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