- Aug 1, 2023
- 150
- 35
- 28
✦₊ ⊹—— it is rare that cicadakit is found play-fighting with the other kits; his siblings, certainly, are a familiar sight in the pack of sandy and inexplicably dripping kits that run about camp, playing and pestering. sometimes he thinks he can feel his papa's gaze on his back, or his dad's, watching the way he lurks beneath the nodding and tired ferns like a corpse in a waterlogged grave. he knows they wish he would be one of those kits, those carefree things who don't care if someone plays too rough or the sand is too hot or the camp too loud. he knows he wants to be one of them, wants his thoughts to become so easy and airy that he could bounce about playing mock-clan without a single trace of thought or (oh, far too much) care.
perhaps he'd been driven by these thoughts, or by some long-buried childish want to play, but today he's finally answered the call of another kit. a relative stranger, not one of his siblings or the nursery's newest arrivals, is this cream-pelted shape; named sandkit or something of that simplistic ilk. he envies the other child, jealousy poisonous in two-toned eyes at their plain name and warrior parents, indistinguishable from the droves of damp cats who move out for patrols every day at his father's commands. everyone tells him that it's such a blessing to be the leader's son, to be called 'kingsblood', to have a legacy already paved out before him. he doesn't find it so; in the deepest hours of the nights when the moon is naught but a sliver, when nightmares dripping with stars and river-muck weigh down his mind, he wishes he was never born cicadakit at all. he wishes he was mousekit or sandkit or puddlekit, born to cats with names ending in claw, pelt, fang instead of star, and then he forgets those midnight wishes made in sleep and guilt.
now he paces a miniature battle circle around sandkit, the thin she-kit before him bracing herself for the play-fight; in a rush of overlong limbs and jutting vertebra he's attacking the cream-furred kit, wrestling a squirming shape beneath the pointed notches of his ribs as the two roll in the sand in a flurry of kitten-swipes. a beat and it's turning too real as he pins sandkit beneath a large white paw, the other coming down again and again in graceless swipes, thoughtless and brutal, until they manage to kick him away. and he can't stop himself, can't stop to think it over before he's lurching forward again, his strikes, clumsy and uncaring as they are, meeting little but air as the other kit dances away.
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ooc: please wait for @iciclefang !!
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disclaimer: it's important to note that cicadakit is not always in a stable state of mind. his view of the world may not always be accurate to objective reality, which may include seeing things that are not genuinely there, reading motivations or thoughts from actions that are not actually implied, and making assumptions or jumping to conclusions. this is not an attempt at metagaming, powerplaying, or mischaracterization, and is not legitimately true or correct to reality or what your characters actually think or believe.
it will always be noted in the post if he is seeing something that isn't actually there. all opinions & thoughts are ic only and do not reflect my thoughts and opinions as a writer. -
— he/him ; kit of riverclan ; 2 ☾s
— "speech" ; thoughts ; attacks
— penned by dejavu