THE ONE WHO SUNDERS | dogfur

[FERNDANCE]

The decision to meet with Dogfur after the meeting had not been a difficult one to make. Until now, Ferndance had thought there was a fairweather element to their bond; even if she had had sleepless nights worrying about his location, she had believed there to be a mutual understanding that neither would come between the other's enterprises. In the wilderness, that was how it worked, where the only bonds were family and others came and went like the seasons. She should have expected clans to be different, there was no leaving a clan quite as easily as a loner group, yet Dogfur's defense of her in spite of the social sacrifice it may have been caused the cinnamon tabby to re-assess what it truly meant to be friends with someone. As they moved along, the former Lead felt the stares of their clanmates, likely presuming the two were off to scheme the most superfluous things in their favourite fleabitten corner. Instead, Ferndance found herself staring at the tortoiseshell with an unspoken admiration. She hadn't imagined she'd ever feel this much friendly love for another other than herself.

"This doesn't feel great, I'm thinking very bad things about my friend... " The warrior admitted beneath a quiet exhale, eyes wet with unfallen tears. It had been a public declaration, calling her incompetent, incapable of feeling anything, an accusation that she made the clans laugh at her instead of with her. A price had been paid for opening her heart to the clan, a vicious reminder that they were no different from the rogues that her parents had tried to usher her away from. She licked her paw and swiped it over her ear, hoping a quick groom would be a sufficient distraction from the stressful soul-searching. With one ear still pressed to her head, she blinked rapidly. "Not you, the other friend, the... not-friend anymore, I guess." There were more colourful phrases bouncing around her mind, ready to be spoken when she had a moment alone with Chilledstar, if she ever had a moment alone with Chilledstar.... would she even want such a thing? A glance at her claws, a promise of scarlet upon them, severed as she realised she had no interest in being the one to see the betrayal repaid. As funny as it would be to give ShadowClan a fourth leader, she didn't think herself ready to take upon such a role and neither were any of the alternatives.

She shook out her fur, the coarse ends bristled like a badger's hide. "I knew I should've borrowed that dillweed's rocks... who needs that many rocks anyways?" Not her, she only had.... two rocks? Three rocks? Her head tilted as she mentally counted; another distraction, another way of not having to think about the day.

@DOGFUR

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[DOGFUR]

Unfettered by the crushing weight of social expectations and responsibilities (and Dogfur did not seem interested particularly in gaining any responsibilities any time soon), it was easy to give voice some of his dissent. He did not expect to receive punishment (not under Chilledstar's reign, but perhaps when Pitchstar ruled, he would have kept his tongue more cleverly). However, the tortoiseshell would have not done it for any other random cat.

"What happened with Howlingstar? Why would they make such a silly decision?" Dogfur pressed, settling his scrawny haunches down against the ground as his flea-bitten ears flicked forward in angle toward his friend. No other cat garnered such a respect from the egg-brained fool. There was no doubt something special between them. Not like how Smogmaw stared at Halfshade (may she rest In peace, Dogfur thought dutifully) but perhaps something deeper.

"If it is true that they do not like you personally, I cannot imagine they would wait until they were sick with yellow brain-fever to announce it." He said simply, forgetting the word for yellow cough evidently.

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[FERNDANCE]

"I.... don't know," she mewed, swiping a paw over her ear. She remembered the leader visiting her lost warrior, how poorly he had spoken of her, how quick Sabletuft had been to defend the ThunderClanner. Ferndance had only been doing right by a friend, and it seemed to have cost her another in fire and brimstone. She didn't know when the opinions of those across the Thunderpath had become a problem for her home, or if it was just an excuse to sever a bond that had reached its endpoint. A chill ran down the tabby's spine as the memories came back to her, StarClan, how many had turned on her? How many had just been faking their love for her? More thoughts spiraled around her mind like a tabby's stripes, of a white-masked tabby declaring the clans to be the future, of a black cat declaring that she would be safe within the marsh. Both had been so, so wrong, yet she did not know how she would tell her parents such a thing the next time her family traveled to the marsh. Ferndance bunched her paws closer together, the world feeling empty, only herself and Dogfur occupying whatever remained. "I'm always happy to make a fool of myself, but it's on my terms, not theirs."

Her terms were broad and unending, a vast expanse or a river that seemed to have no end. Somehow, ShadowClan had found the boundary (a killing bite to her neck, almost) and pushed past it in favour of a near-apprentice. Conformity fit the warrior like a kitten's collar, if she was too cool to oversee the clan, then she would just have to set her sights further up the chain. Smogmaw was likely to be grief-stricken when he returned, perhaps Deputy would be better suited for her. The whimsical ambition was set in glass and the cinnamon she-cat tilted her head as she made her way back to reality. "Yellow-brain..." she mused quietly, awe striking her green eyes as she temporarily forgot what saddened her. "I saw brain once, it was pink, not yellow. If Chilledstar's brain is yellow then..." She paused, blinking slowly. Then, an admittance. "I don't know what that means." Nothing good, or maybe something good, if it meant the one who betrayed her trust would suffer for it. Death was the only punishment for treachery and hurt feelings, if she did not have to tangle with killing a loved one, then all the better.

She shuffled her paws, shoulders weighed down by invisible stones, grief riddled upon her expression no matter how hard her smile tried to mask it. Her scarless body had never felt pain such as the one she carried now, inflicted by those who she... admittedly probably wouldn't have died for, but still liked enough to try and save them should they demand it. "Dogfur... if I die before you, will you tell me what colour my brain is?"

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