private THE STARS WILL GO OUT BEFORE I FORGET YOU [✿] blazestar

[DOEBLAZE]

✿—— the air feels colder as they pad towards the sandy ravine as if it were a normal training day—perhaps it's the slow descent of leaf-fall upon the forest, or (more likely) it is the cold reality before her. battle training with blazestar had been a common enough thing ever since she became a sort-of-warrior, the treks to the sand-floored hollow a comforting routine as she slowly built her skills and sparred with many, many crashes into that sand-packed earth. today feels different, though, and she isn't foolish enough to pretend she doesn't know why things feel different - there are no more sunlit spars ahead of them for a long time. possibly forever, is the reality she doesn't want to confront in the short days before she's due to set out on this journey, the journey even their most experienced warriors had hesitated to volunteer for.

"so, uh, you're g-getting me ready to meet windclan, right?" bobbie tries for a joke, but her voice cracks into a rasp mid-sentence and she can't seem to restore it to the fake cheer that had supported it. the smile on her face wavers, shatters, and falls away a breath after it had arrived, maned head dipping to look down at paws that end in slowly spreading white. her worries about those white freckles have dwindled into some distant cavern of her mind in the face of the much larger predators that now stalk her thoughts, retreated but not quite gone. it's hard to worry as much about these small problems when the big one seem to pile up with every sunrise—two kits in the medicine den, one with no way out, sickness rippling across the forest, the journey looming ahead, the reality that—.

the reality that she may never see a smiling and golden face again - the reality that she may never return to see lupinepaw lap up a honey-sweetened cure - the reality that none of them could. the weight of this responsibility she'd offered herself up for feels heavy between her shoulder blades, pushing her spine until she thinks her legs will buckle. she tries a glance towards blazestar, trying to read the ragdoll's thoughts within his face—her efforts yield nothing and she looks back down, guilt a bitter taste lurking behind her teeth. her voice is a raw rasp as she mews in a near-whisper, "i'll - i'll come back. i promise."

the tabby clears her throat as her paws meet sand, some indescribable feeling lurking at the tips of her ears and lining her narrow ribcage as she faces blazestar once again. in comparison to the hopeful lilac face the leader had squared off against over a moon ago, bobbie is a cat changed. exhaustion hides in the hollow set of her eyes and the tense pull of her shoulders, bloody bodies piling up behind her eyelids; she is emptied and changed by the events she can't believe have transpired in less than two moons. still she reaches for that cold pooling within her and finds it calm as ever, holds herself together as she looks up at him with tired eyes and mews, "umm, did you - were you going to teach me anything specific, or just a sp-spar?"

NO LOVE, HOWEVER BRIEF (✿) 𝑰𝑺 𝑾𝑨𝑺𝑻𝑬𝑫

• ooc: @BLAZESTAR !!
  
• nothing here, have a nice day :-)
• 
  — bobbie
  — she/her ; warrior of skyclan ; 40 ☾s
  — "speech" ; thoughts ; attacks
  — chibi by its_oliverr
  — penned by dejavu
  

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[BLAZESTAR]

There’s a somber miasma tainting the air as Blazestar and Bobbie head toward the training grounds. Blazestar wants to display the good cheer he’s otherwise been known for during their spars, but every attempt at a smile dies like an ember caught in a squall. The flame point spares odd glances in his companion’s direction, but each is indirect, focused on the fluff of her tail, the white freckling her striped fur, the ear she wears clipped. When she attempts to joke, Blazestar only gazes at her with some sadness in the bruised depths of his eyes. “Would that I could get you ready for what you’re about to do,” he says, his voice soft. “You’re as ready as you can be.”

With a flick of his brush-like tail, Blazestar climbs onto the shifting, sandy surface of the ravine. His gaze fails to catch hers and vice versa, but when she tells him in an uncertain voice that she’ll return, Blazestar finally turns to focus on her. “I won’t lie and say I’m not afraid that you won’t,” he murmurs. “And truthfully, I don’t want you to go.” He watches her paws—considerably smaller than his—scrape about in the sand, shuffling uncertainly. “But I know you feel you have to. Your kits are ill, your Clanmates. And you are a warrior now.” He reaches out, letting his muzzle rest against her cheek. The fur there is slick, warm, and when he’s so close to her, he can scent through the pine sap they all wear, down to the honeyed core. He closes his eyes for a moment to drink her in, to memorize a scent that could soon be lose to him forever.

Like Little Wolf’s.

When he draws away, the limpid, vulnerable look in sapphire eyes has given way to determination. “Remember when before, we worked on fighting cats? I’m less afraid of you being attacked by the other Clans than I am of all of you falling prey to some loose dogs or something.” He begins to pace. “What if I become a fox? They’re vicious creatures… I’ve lost a life to one before. They can be desperately territorial.”

Quickly, without warning, he bares his teeth as though it will change his muzzle from blunt to long and tapered, and he rushes her, mimicking a savage bite to her shoulder but clipping the air just above it.

✧ INFO.

•  
• 
  — blaise . blazestar
  — he/him ; leader of skyclan
  — pansexual ; divorced ; single
  — longhaired flame point Ragdoll with blue eyes
  — “speech”, thoughts, attack
  — penned by Marquette
  — chibi by Mercibun

​

 

[DOEBLAZE]

✿—— "i don't feel ready," she sighs as they step into the ravine, flicking an ear in embarassment a heartbeat later. the tabby lowers her gaze, shaking her head as she sighs, "sorry. i sound like a petulant kit."

i won't lie and say i'm not afraid that you won't, he mews, and she glances at her shaky paws, lost for words. she wants to assure him that she will return, assert that her vow will be honored, but can she say such a thing with honesty? it would be a lie to say that her nights since she volunteered have not been plagued by sleeplessness, by the haunting beast stalking her crowded mind: that she will not return. that she might die in the mountains, never to see her children receive their warrior names, to see blazestar again. the thought twists her heart helplessly and she sighs low under her breath, exhaustion blurring the edges of her mind; it has been a haunted place lately.

"i don't want to, i just - i have to," she murmurs, feeling the press of his muzzle against her cheek as acutely as she feels her heart beat. the smell of pine-sap and elderberry washes over her like a warm green-leaf breeze, sweeping away the incessant buzzing of her mind, if only for a moment. the feeling of helplessness that plagues her, fear and shame in a terrible storm of emotion, seems to recede when she feels golden fur pressing gently against her. softly bobbie mutters, a momentary humor creeping into her tone, "it's - if i can do this, i suppose i can do anything, can't i?"

then he pulls away, of course, because this is a spar, and the waves crash back to shore. her shoulders pulling tense again, she meets his eyes with what she hopes is an equally determined gaze. ears twitching alertly, she watches him pace with nods of understanding. this, she feels she can handle; how to properly fight a cat is still a skill that evades her, but she has experience (far more than she would like) with other predators. the tabby nods, swishing her shortened tail in interest; dogs she has encountered, but never a fox. the tabby replies, "alright. i think i'm—"

ready, she was going to say, but he charges her without warning. the tabby's quick to dart back, though his mimicked bite would have certainly landed if this was a real battle. recalling that predators need only be driven off rather than beaten into submission, she takes a similar tack as she did with the dog and arrows forward, rearing onto her hind legs and aiming to batter his face and neck with sheathed forepaws.

NO LOVE, HOWEVER BRIEF (✿) 𝑰𝑺 𝑾𝑨𝑺𝑻𝑬𝑫

• ooc: ——
  
• nothing here, have a nice day :-)
• 
  — bobbie
  — she/her ; warrior of skyclan ; 40 ☾s
  — "speech" ; thoughts ; attacks
  — chibi by its_oliverr
  — penned by dejavu
  

​

 

[BLAZESTAR]

“I don’t feel ready,” Bobbie tells him, her voice breathy, shaky. Blazestar longs to comfort her, but the well from which to draw is empty. He needs the comfort, the reassurance, as much as she does—and isn’t that selfish? The Ragdoll shakes his head gently at her assertion that she is being petulant. “No,” he says softly. “No, you are no kit. You are a mother, and you are a warrior.” He has a sudden urge to press himself against her, a solid foundation to hold her up, but he does not. They’ve come here to train—he must remind himself every time, which is foolish, foolish.

“You can do anything,” he says instead.

Their spar begins shortly, his strike catching her off-guard. He skids to a halt in the sand, using a hind paw to kick a cloud of grit in her direction. “Always be ready!” He’s made the mistake many times, and likely will again. He has four lives remaining, though, and Bobbie has only one. “You have kits here waiting for your safe return!”

She darts toward him in a streamlined folding of limbs. Blazestar bares his teeth in a mock snarl, crouching as though he is some canid beast. She rears up, her sheathed paws coming to batter him about the neck and shoulders. As soon as one nears his muzzle, he lashes out with his teeth to catch one paw in his jaw. If he successfully catches one, he will let it go without letting his fangs pierce the skin.

ooc ✧ 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒹𝒶𝓌𝓃, 𝒾𝓉'𝓈 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒷𝓇𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉

•  

• 

• 

  — blaise . blazestar
  — he/him ; leader of skyclan
  — pansexual ; divorced ; single
  — longhaired flame point Ragdoll with blue eyes
  — “speech”, thoughts, attack
  — penned by Marquette
  — chibi by Mercibun

​

 

[DOEBLAZE]

✿ | "if only," she murmurs lowly in reply, a relative storm of emotion churning between her ribs. she wants to believe blazestar, wants to believe she can act like one of the lionclan warriors he told her stories of, but she's just not sure. she can feel the anger spreading through her core, the want to prove herself, but she hesitates to make use of it—and her initial strikes reflect that, weak and caught by the trapping jaws of self-doubt.

blazestar's heavy hind paw, not yet weakened by starvation and illness to come (oh, how fortunate she was now, she will think later), swings in a heavy arc of grit and sand that quickly assumes itself into an angry mist in the air, one that tickles the back of her throat with the temptation to cough and clouds her vision. his voice rings out sharply, correcting her, and bobbie swings her head in an attempt to dislodge any stray grit and doesn't pause for a nod.

his teeth bare in a mock snarl, crouching like a rabid beast and catching one white-dipped paw between his fangs, letting it go shortly after. bobbie winces at her own incompetence, her own perceived lack of skill—were this a real fight for her life, she would have very well lost it. in the brief moments between this strike and the next, she takes a silent inventory of why she is so incapable of beating him in a spar. no wonder your clanmates treat you like an apprentice, she thinks harshly, open mouth peeking between her bared canines as she inhales dusty air.

fury is a low current in her veins, a deep vein of anger that strikes into her heart like the serpentine curve and twist of a river running inland. she's aware of it, the cold anger at injustice within her, but she has never had cause to draw on it. she has never wanted to be someone like that—someone who takes charge and says what she wants and yells when she must, who fights without letting self-doubt hold her strikes back. and yet, suddenly she wants that, wants to be someone who will do what she thinks is right and say what she damn well pleases instead of breathy-voiced complaints that go ignored. someone who fights as hard as the lion blazestar believes her to be, who doesn't take the shit infinite that life seems intent on dealing to her.

he's right, she thinks sharply, and her anger is not directed at blazestar—there's an appreciative gleam to her eyes even as she prepares for her next strike. i am not an apprentice, i am not a kittypet, and i am not a weak cat, the warrior thinks even as she braces her limbs for an attack. these thoughts are pleasant, but she has had them many times, and she doubts she'll put much effort to standing up for herself even after this battle.

so she may as well make use of it now—lengthy canines bared, she crouches, digging her hind paws into the sand beneath her. though blazestar isn't near the size of a real fox, of course, she leaps skyward and attempts to jump at his neck and back as though he were, digging sheathed paws into any flesh she can reach. she lets bitterness fuel her strikes, swinging with all the force she can muster.

ooc ✿ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒏𝒐𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒅

• ooc:
  

• 

• 

  ( BOBBIE ) ✿ WARRIOR OF SKYCLAN.
  x she / her ; 40 moons.
  x mother to lupinepaw, crowpaw, & drowsypaw.
  x a small, pretty lilac tabby & white cat with a red collar & sage-green eyes ; sweet, sociable, and somewhat naive to certain aspects of clan life.
  x currently in an era of self-assessment and trying to figure out exactly who she wants to be.

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