there's a fire that burns inside - flickerfire

[emberstar]

IT WENT FROM A SPARK TO AN OPEN FLAME ⋆⁺₊⋆ It feels like a chance to breathe, whenever Emberstar slipped away from the Thunderclan camp to go see Flickerfire.

Not to say she was unhappy with her clan, quite the opposite. They were her friends, her family, her entire life. All nine of them. Each and every one of her nine she was ready and willing to give, should they only ask. Already, she had given two, and she did not regret that in the slightest. There had been hardships because of her choice to lead her clan, ones that had worn away the cat she had once been, but still it was all worth it. Anything would be worth it, for them.

That didn't mean it didn't weigh on her though. There was not a day that went by that she didn't worry, in the back of her mind, that she wouldn't have enough to give. That she couldn't protect them all. It was a worry that had carved itself into her features during her long moons.

None of that mattered when she was with Flickerfire. She was just happy, plain and simple. All her worries just melted away the moment when she caught sight of those flaming orange eyes. Occasionally, she had caught herself smiling, unconsciously, just from thinking of the other molly. Remembering their moments together just made her feel warm. Which was useful in these cold leafbares. She felt more like who she had been before the clans when they were together.

All of that was reason enough for her to slip across the thunderpath into Shadowclan, keeping low to the ground as she searched for Flickerfire. ​

 

[FLICKERFIRE]

( : ̗̀➛ ) It's a risk for Flickerfire to slip over the asphalt barrier that shields their Clans from one another, to loll about with her friend in piles of oak and maple leaves, but it's another danger altogether for the ThunderClan leader to enter ShadowClan territory.

They normally meet under the cover of night, as ThunderClan is resting in their dens. But ShadowClan, true to their name, traipse all over their territory when darkness falls. Apprentices are trained, patrols are sent out, and her Clanmates are interspersed throughout the marshland.

It's why she's so surprised to catch Emberstar's scent so close to her. She weaves her way around a clump of reeds, peering through the fronds to see a pelt golden as sunshine. There's no cat with fur like that on her side of the border, and she scowls despite the excitement that spikes her freckled fur.

"Real bold of ya to come over here, for a change," Flickerfire purrs. She reveals herself, stepping across frozen pine needles to stand in a patch of moonlight that illuminates her. Her flaming gaze fixes itself on the ThunderClan leader, warmth radiating from the lead warrior. "Glad ya came, though. Here, follow me -- we'll need some privacy."

She passes by Emberstar and noses her shoulder. Flickerfire begins to pad away from the border, towards a secluded spot completely encircled by foliage -- not Emberstar's kind of trees and undergrowth, but reeds and clumps of marshgrass. Here they can settle, relax -- or try to.

Flickerfire's ears are pricked, her paws ready to leap at a moment's notice. She won't let any of her frog-brained Clanmate harm Emberstar, no matter what stupid ideas they hold about her.

"Is everything alright? Or ya just had to get away?" She rolls over onto her back, revealing her jet-black belly playfully.​

( WELL I WON'T EVER CHANGE MY WAYS ; AND I CAN'T BE STRONG )

 

[emberstar]

IT WENT FROM A SPARK TO AN OPEN FLAME ⋆⁺₊⋆ Emberstar tensed as she heard pawsteps close by, before a familiar voice called out to her. She sighed in relief, all the worry melting from her frame. "Heya." She greeted cheerfully. Her smile came easily now, and it only seemed to grow at Flickerfire's touch.

Without any hesitation, she wordlessly followed Flickerfire's lead, trusting her to lead them somewhere safe. She hadn't really thought this whole excursion through. Her only plan had been to dive back across the border if she caught the scent of anyone who wasn't Flickerfire.

As they walked she just stared at the other molly, her head tilted in thought. "You look good in the sunlight." She stated, decidedly, then blinked at the words. They had just sorta come out as she had thought them. It had been a while since they had last seen each other during the day. In the dark of night Flickerfire's pelt seemed to melt into the shadow's at times, leaving only her fiery eyes and the specs of orange on her pelt viable. This was much better, Emberstar thought.

"It's so different here." Emberstar blurted out suddenly. She glanced away from the molly beside her, her gaze drifted between the stagnant pools and the small clumps of grass that they passed. It was all so different from the territories she had known. Even the pines, which had seemed familiar from across the border, seemed strange in this setting. Her ear flicked. "I don't like it."

Emberstar blinked as she recognized the question she had been asked, before rushing to reassure Flickerfire. "Oh! Nothing's wrong, really. Well, I mean, you heard about all that happened at the gathering, but that's not why I came. I just wanted to see you." The leader admitted, in a tangled, roundabout ramble. Seemingly exhausted by the statement she flopped down alongside Flickerfire with a sigh, snuggling up close to share warmth and wrapping her tail around the both of them. ​

 

[FLICKERFIRE]

"You look good in the sunlight." The tortoiseshell half-turns to catch Emberstar's expression. The flame point looks surprised at herself for having said it, and Flickerfire's fur begins to feel warm despite the cold. "I'm made for shadows," she murmurs, smiling. "You're the only sunlight I don't mind." Truly, if any cat looked good standing in a beam of sunshine, it was Emberstar -- the she-cat is warmth and fire personified, golden and pure and soothing. She can't bring herself to voice this, but her orange eyes flash with meaning.

She can tell the ThunderClan leader is uneasy in ShadowClan's terrain. Their paws don't crunch leaves, don't tread through undergrowth; pine needles snap and the ground is ever-damp. Emberstar voices her displeasure, and Flickerfire laughs. "I didn't like it when I first came here, either," she confesses. She'd been a scrap of a kit, then, though, and she hadn't liked anything or anyone. She'd bitten the paws that had fed her so many times, it was a wonder Briarstar -- then Briar -- had allowed her to stay. "But you get used to it, I guess."

Once the two come to their hiding place, Emberstar tells her nothing's wrong -- "I just wanted to see you." Flickerfire's smile widens, especially as the flame point settles beside her and wraps her long, thin tail around them both. Sharing their warmth, their fire, the tortoiseshell allows herself a closeness she has never shared with her Clanmates -- she rubs her face against Emberstar's and licks a flame-colored ear. "I'm glad you came," she says in a raspy voice. "It's been so damn gloomy in ShadowClan..." She hesitates, unsure of how much she should dare to say, as ever, but her trust in Emberstar overrides any caution. "It's like we're eating ourselves alive. And all I want to do is sneak away to be with you."​

 

[emberstar]

IT WENT FROM A SPARK TO AN OPEN FLAME ⋆⁺₊⋆ Emberstar liked listening to Flickerfire talk. She was funny and clever, even when she was being a little bit mean. Her voice was like nothing she had ever heard, low and sometimes raspy in a way that was pleasant to her ears. Even when it's suggesting that they run away together, that she abandon her clan, she can't bring herself to rebuke it as she might another. So she didn't. For once she didn't say anything at all.

She just stared at Flickerfire.

The leader didn't know what to do with the feeling that was burning in her chest. It wasn't anything new, she was sure of that much at least. This was something she had felt around Flickerfire before. It was so much brighter now though, as the other molly licked her ear. She had no clue where to put it. It needed to go somewhere, it was threatening to burst from her body, to engulf her in flame.

She blinked silently.

She stared into Flickerfire's eyes.

What was this feeling?

"I might just love ya." Emberstar stated without thinking. Love. It was such a big word. Reserved for her mother and her clan and things that she couldn't have. It sounded like the right word though, now that she heard it with her own ears.

Another blink.

She had never been in love. ​

 

[FLICKERFIRE]

Emberstar is listening to her, but Flickerfire can see that she's processing something, the way she's blinking as though she's working on some foreign thought, attempting to untangle it like fine silk, unraveling a spider's web without tearing it. The tortoiseshell scowls at her impatiently. "What? Did you hear somethin'? Do I have somethin' on my face?" She opens her mouth, readying an insult, when the other she-cat stops her in her tracks.

"I might just love ya." Said entirely seriously. Emberstar looks almost surprised at herself, though it's nothing compared to Flickerfire's reaction.

"You what?" She sputters. In an instant, she's on her paws, as though the ThunderClan leader has told her something astounding, something that has shaken Flickerfire's meager, dark world to its coal-black core.

She has.

Love. It's a word Flickerfire has not considered since her mother died, since her sister. Since Moth, though even then, neither had told the other they'd loved one another. Love was something lost, something forgotten, a rune buried by sandswept winds, meant to be lost to time and worn away. Something to be sacrificed for the pleasures of fresh-kill, a nap in the sun, stalking the shadows with relative freedom.

Something sacrificed, with blood-stained paws that never wash clean.

Flickerfire's eyes meet Emberstar's wide, unblinking rain-gray ones. Inferno and storm. Fire and shadow. Darkness and light. But for a moment, she lets herself entertain the idea -- the idea that she could love another cat, a cat who she hadn't lost forever --

The idea sends terror rushing through her, and it's unstoppable, undammed, because Flickerfire knows she loves Emberstar too. She fights her body that wants to tremble, wants to crumple before the flame point. She wants to cry, I love you, and that's why I want you to run away with me. Let me steal all of your remaining lives. Let's leave the cats we're supposed to protect behind, and let me protect you, like I couldn't protect anyone else.

"Maybe I love ya, too," she rasps, bowing her head for a moment. "Maybe that's why I just want to beat your sorry tail every time you throw yourself under a tree or through a fire for some cat who doesn't deserve it." Her flesh burns with the nakedness of her confession. She hates feeling vulnerable. She hates that she's laid herself bare, that Emberstar has done the same even if she hadn't meant to.

After a heartbeat, Flickerfire lifts her gaze again. "I'll tell you I love you, but you gotta stop... you gotta..." And she knows she can't make Emberstar promise that. "Save some of yourself for me. For us. Because I can't lose you, too." It's the closest she can get to what she wants to say.

With a few faltering steps, Flickerfire settles in front of Emberstar again, and she presses her forehead to the other she-cat's so their eyes are close, their breaths mingling. "Fine. Frogbrain. I love ya too."​

[ PENNED BY MARQUETTE ]​

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