pafp Tinder to cinder / dating advice(?)

[Snakeblink]

Snakeblink likes solving problems for other people. Whether others likes his... somewhat invasive manner of helping is arguable, and irrelevant. His philosophy is to try until he's stopped, be it by success or someone telling him to cut it out: humiliating failure is only ever a setback in his grand plan to better the lives of everyone he cares about – whether they like it or not. He'll always respect a clear boundary when it's set, but he thrives in the grey areas of others' worn patience.

Some cats appreciate it; most are somewhere between indifference and irritation. So far, Cindershade had seemed to belong to a third category of cats: those more likely to bite his face off than to welcome his assistance. She's certainly never sounded particularly kindly disposed towards him. He's usually smart enough to steer clear of these clanmates of his and keep his meddling to a secretive minimum, never more than a remark here, a spot of eavesdropping there.

So how they got here – with Cindershade suffering his incessant prattling with, if not indulgence, at least quiet resignation – is beyond him, but he's running with it. He's in his element: talking at length about anything, speeches and monologues, these come to him as easily as swimming in Greenleaf water.

Much to his detriment: speech comes naturally to him, but he's as liable to trip on his own tongue and say the wrong thing on accident as a kit is to trip on their growing paws. The longer he goes on, the more likely it gets. With his mind three fox lengths ahead of his mouth, his unsupervised tongue tends to lash out in unpredictable ways in an attempt to close the distance. In much the same way as his thoughts, left to their own device, will tie themselves into knots and mats that leave everyone, him first and foremost, absolutely confounded as to how they got this bad in the first place.

The things an anxious mind will come up with are simply marvelous in their own idiotic way.

But here he goes, doing it again: distracted by his own spiralling thoughts, for all that they spiral inward rather than straight down into some dark recesses of his mind. He is on a mission here: he is trying to find Cindershade someone to love. Or at least someone to soften that prickly personality of hers with their affection. It can only improve her mood, and a happy Cindershade is a Cindershade less likely to grab Snakeblink by the scruff of his neck and shake him until his vertebraes rattle like tumbling rocks.

It hasn't happened yet, thanks to a small miracle sent from Starclan he assumes, but it's only a matter of time before her patience runs out and Snakeblink intends to be in her good graces or far away when that finally happens.

He's been at it for a while, listing off every eligible bachelorette in the clan with as many of their qualities as he could quote off the top of his head at the moment. He hasn't gone so far as pacing as he speaks – he tries to keep himself still and quiet enough that Cindershade might forget that she's supposed to find him annoying – but his head swivels from side to side as he thinks, eyes jumping around their temporary base even when speaking of mollies currently absent from the camp.

”Now who else is there... I have it on good authority that Hyacintbreath is a beautiful molly – not to mention morally upstanding, else she would not be among us today. Or there is Silvergleam... No, you're right, she's a bit young for you.” Cindershade hasn't said word; nor, indeed, was she given the time to. Snakeblink can fuel both sides of a conversation with ease, and can even play off entire arguments with himself if he goes uninterrupted for long enough.

He sighs. His voice, until then a thoughtful, lilting hiss, takes a cajoling note as he switches tracks. ”The way I see it, what you need is a strategy. So many choices with no plan in mind and you're sure to flounder. Maybe you should take the first step. Put yourself out there, sell yourself a little, play up your strengths.”

Admittedly he doesn't know much about the appeal of feminity, but charm is charm no matter the exterior presentation, right? He's sure he can improvise off what he knows to be attractive. ”You're...” He stumbles a little, glad to have caught himself in time: he was about to say short, seeing as honesty is the best policy, but she might take offense to it. ”Sturdy. Hefty! A strong cat able to work with what little she's given. And your pelt looks very nice. Very glossy," he purrs, mind still whirring.

He's never found the need, time or courage to court anyone himself: he is working entirely off secondhand knowledge here, but he's sure they can come up with something that will get Cinder the attention of someone she likes.
​

ooc. information.

• 
  
• — Snakeblink • he / him. 37 ☾, riverclan warrior
  — a sleek, skinny tabby with long ears and a scar over his right eye.
  — gay, not actually evil, penned by @Kangoo
  
  
  

​

​

 

[Cindershade]

How Cindershade found herself in this predicament was none other than StarClan formally punishing her for whatever she's done wrong. Did she not pray enough to them—did not thank them enough for any small amount of food she could manage to bring back to her clan? Snakeblink is prattling along, his jaw moving in short bursts and flowing movements while his tongue flicked in an incessant ramble of words she halfway tuned in and out of. Her patience is growing thin as he meddles in her personal business, naming off these "eligible bachelorettes" as if she had mentioned it to him beforehand. She doesn't show it, only staring off with a half-narrowed gaze at nothing in particular. Her whiskers would flick every once in a while, or a quick flick of her obsidian tipped tail.
His persistence was starting to weave its way under her rosetted pelt as he starts as far as rattling off names to her, his tone quiet but it feels so loud. Her head whips to him as she stares at him incredulously, her chartreuse eyes widening while her shaded ears oon against her cranium. "Everyone can hear you!" She hisses, lowering her head as her eyes dart around the temporary camp site. He mentions of Hyacinthbreath and she shifts uneasily at the taller molly's name, her tail flicking. Yes, she was very easy on the eyes with her flowing long hair and stark white coat with tabby patches. She was a loyal RiverClan cat now, despite her past living among the moorland trash. At the mention of Silvergleam next, the shaded molly merely scoffs while eyeing the silver tabby from afar. She was still a child in the older warriors eyes! She just had her warrior ceremony a few moons ago. Like she'd ever be interested in an adolescent female!
Snakeblink doesn't stop there, his continuance to keep going despite the few murderous glares she had spared towards the brown and white tom had her patience growing taut like a string that threatened to snap under the pressure at any moment. He's going on about some sort of strategy in order for her to whoo any potential seekers and selling herself as if she were meant to be put on display. Her cheeks begin to flush as the blood boils in her face, heat beginning to permeate off of her in waves. He's cutting it so close and he doesn't even know that she's about to spill over in a pit of rage. One more thing. One more. Her string was tearing under the pressure.

And now he had severed it.
You're—sturdy. Hefty! A strong cat able to work with what little she's given.

At the mention of her figure, Cindershade's eyes snap to him with seething indignation. Her head swims as the blood leaves her paws and builds in her rounded head. If hellfire could spring from her very ears, it would and set ablaze to the tom who sat beside her. Her jaw sets into a murderous baring of incisors, ivory gleaming against her dark features. Curved claws would slip from their sheaths, vile daggers filed into razor tipped points to slay her enemies in one fell swoop. She was not hefty! Cindershade beared vivacious curves of well toned muscle with very little fat; especially during Leaf-Bare. Silently she stands, the tips of her ears barely reaching Snakeblink's patterned muzzle. A looming shadow would cloak over him, a murderous leviathan lurking in the depths of her soul that itched to be set free from it's steel cage. She stares at him intently, chartreuse eyes blazing. "What—was that, Snakeblink?" She speaks now, her raspy tone growing louder and more demonic-like as a snarl edges her tone. "Care to say that again? If you value what pathetic little life you have—I suggest you not and watch what you say." A paw raises from it's stanced position, threatening to lash out against the nape of his neck. Her breathing becomes labored as she eyes the tom, waiting for him to speak again if he dared to determine his demise.
​

[ SILENCE IS DEAFENING ]​

 

[ashpaw!]

Ashpaw is getting used to walking again. Seven days since the fox attack, she's healing up nicely, no sign of infection or anything according to Beesong. She's definitely not ready for training yet, but she will be in a few days as long as she doesn't reopen anything.

Little walks around the camp are okay, so that's what Ash has been doing. And this one is proving to be entertaining.

Ashpaw tilts her head, listening in. What are they talking about?

"Willowroot is the prettiest cat in RiverClan," she pipes up, because that seems relevant and worth mentioning. Maybe it's just Snakeblink's usual gossip? If it's prettiness gossip then he'd better agree with her or they won't be friends anymore.

It hits her about three seconds too late what they're actually talking about. Oh StarClan. This is a conversation about mates. Ashpaw flushes beneath her pelt, embarrassed — Willowroot is obviously very taken —

"I — uh — oh. Wait. Mates. Right. I can help, I can help!"

Ashpaw frowns, thinking hard. Mates..... with Cindershade? Hmm. Who should be subjected to that?

"Oh! Hyacinthbreath," she suggests, a name that Snakeblink has already brought up and actually seems like a good candidate. "You're both super scary. So it's a perfect match." She nods firmly. Who better to pair with the scary lady than the other scary lady?

Her eyes widen at Snakeblink's comment on Cindershade's... figure. Oh, no. Ohhh, StarClan. Ashpaw likes having Snakeblink around. He can't just go saying stuff like that, he'll get himself murdered and then what will she do?​

—— " i found gold in the wreckage "

✦ ooc ✦ character information ✦ recent events

• sorry if this post seems a bit all over the place! i tried ajhdjdbcb
  
  
• - 8 month old orange tabby with green eyes
  - apprenticed to lead warrior willowroot
  - crushing hard on iciclepaw
  - happy-go-lucky, mischievous, hardworking
  - very friendly, but defensive of riverclan!
  - "speech"
• - disclosed being abused by spiderfall, who was exiled & who then killed her best friend pumpkinpaw
  
  - temporarily apprenticed to npc pebbleskip due to willowroot moving into the nursery
  
  - benched for a few weeks at smokethroat's request after a training incident; mainly stays in camp and helps with the kits or does chores
  

​

 

[HOUNDSTRIDE.]

Truth be told, Hound's found no fault in Snakeblink's advice thus far. Could be simply that he's not had much of it directed to him. Or maybe it's something that one few with a specific way of thinking can stomach. He hears the tom's comments on Cindershade– in fact, he finds himself nodding along to them. Though he's so rarely found himself interested in mollies, sturdy an' hefty have been just his sort. Not to say that she counted herself among them. As much as he may like her, all of it's the platonic sort. She was someone that he thinks he can rely on, just as Snakeblink was. Even if he was more incline towards attraction to one than the other–

Really, he's thought himself in knots already on that subject, and so it disappears gladly in a puff of smoke when Cinder's anger makes itself vibrantly known. His head lifts. He'd been eating nearby, mouth still half-full, and he's half a mind to just duck his head and keep eating. Better to leave Snakeblink to his fate than risk his own neck. Except he'd never truly been one for that, and the chocolate tabby's finding his paws before he can stop himself. What's he even supposed to say? Hefty's not a bad thing to be? No, she'd cut him down for that. Was the issue more with that of her height? The tom himself's a looming beast, taller than most any in the clan aside from their esteemed leader. He's no idea what it means to be short, or even why she would find such a thing so offensive. Verdant eyes flicker between Cindershade and Snakeblink, then to Ashpaw who seems to have no better idea to save this situation than he does.

"Come on now, Cinder," he tries, voice smooth as he can make it, "don't fault 'im for the slip-up. Look at him, I doubt he'd know a pretty molly if she was sitting right in front'f him." Jokingly, he reaches out to prod the other warrior's shoulder. "Clearly he doesn't, seein' as you're right there."

﹥ˏˋ〘  OOC NOTES INFORMATION 〙ˊˎ﹤

• ooc: —
• ──── houndsnarl. trans male, he/him pronouns.
  ──── approximately 30 moons old, or 2.5 years.
  ──── bisexual with firm male preference; single.
  
  ──── a chocolate tabby with ( stylized ) low white and intense lime eyes. lean and lanky,  with whiplike musculature and a long, quick stride. hound's notable features include his impressive height, the long scar across the left side of his face from nose to jaw, his very deep, dense fur, and the confident manner with which he conducts himself.
• "speech"

​

 

[Snakeblink]

So, perhaps Snakeblink wasn’t paying as much attention to Cindershade’s mood as he should have been. Maybe he got a bit carried away. It’s not like he’s entirely cut off from others that way: he hears Ashpaw loud and clear, and inclines his head in agreement at her comment about Willowroot — one should never argue about one’s mother’s qualities, after all. But he’s still distracted, by his own thought process, by Ashpaw’s comment on Hyacinthbreath’s qualities which only spurs it along. Clearly, he has this right… right?

Not right. Not right at all.

Cindershade turns on him like a fury from hell, teeth glinting, her eyes twin suns blazing from the night sky of her dark face. He freezes in place, feeling suddenly sympathetic of the vole he’s hunted throughout his life as she stands, graceful with tightly-contained violence. He’s acutely aware of the sharpness of her claws as she lifts a threatening paw, snarling a threat and a warning in one breath. His pupils are thin black slits in wide emerald eyes, fleeting around for a way out.

He doesn’t even know what he said wrong.

Unfortunately and despite her clear threat, Snakeblink has never known when to stop running his mouth when words might still save him yet. Leaning back in increments as her killing intent becomes increasingly tangible, he utters with an awkward, placating smile, ”I only meant that you’re powerful despite some… natural disadvantages! You are a meaty, vigorous warrior, and your stature is in no way a detraction to your strength! It's barely noticeable, really!”

And that’s a good thing, right? He knows other clans find their robust, well-fed physique — of which Snakeblink himself is a poor example — attractive, and strength is in his opinion only adds to a warrior’s appeal. He glances at Ashpaw, shifty-eyed, to confirm his claim.

Houndsnarl’s interjection is a starsend. Snakeblink has never been so happy to hear that low drawl of his before. He would scramble behind the larger tom’s bulk for shelter if he had a little less dignity — and if he was less worried that, by moving, he would trigger Cindershade’s hunting instincts and prompt her to tear his jugular out.

So he stays where he is, already nodding before the other tabby has finished speaking. He starts to lift a paw, slowly positioning himself for a quick getaway if it comes to it. Unfortunately, something catches his attention — a turn of phrase which, in his anxious state of mind, he wildly misinterprets.

After all, he did call her pretty, and here’s where that got him. Is that what Houndsnarl means? Did she take offense to him commenting on her appearance at all, to that suggestion that she is soft and vain? Was this the faux pas? Then he’s only made things worse!

In a rush to correct himself, Snakeblink unwittingly undoes everything Houndsnarl might have accomplished by saying:

”He’s right! You shouldn’t listen to me!” He lets out a short, nervous chuckle which only serves to make the words sound sarcastic instead of self-deprecating. ”I don’t know anything about prettiness. I misspoke. I’m sure no one believes you’re pretty. Forget I said anything. “
​

ooc. information.

• 
  
• — Snakeblink • he / him. 37 ☾, riverclan warrior
  — a sleek, skinny tabby with long ears and a scar over his right eye.
  — gay, not actually evil, penned by @Kangoo
  
  
  

​

​

 

[iciclefang]

As Iciclepaw comes to join Ashpaw in the conversation, her expression of amusement becomes evident in each blunder Snakeblink makes. Cindershade takes offense so easily, it seems. The tortoiseshell blinks at Houndsnarl attempting to come to the tabby's rescue, but he keeps putting all four paws into his mouth as though he can't stop himself.

"There's nothing wrong with a she-cat being meaty, or hefty, or... whatever Snakeblink's trying to say," she assures Cindershade. "She-cats are pretty no matter what." A quick glance at Ashpaw, one that incriminates her to anyone paying attention. Realizing her faux pas, she jerks her gaze away, flesh burning under her fur despite her expression remaining relatively cool.

Oops. She attempts to gather some of her dignity by continuing: "Besides, like Houndsnarl said, this guy wouldn't know a pretty she-cat if she ripped him limb from limb. So it's a wasted effort." Her nose twitches at her joke.​

[ PENNED BY MARQUETTE ]​

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[Redpath]

Redpath had been listening to the conversation passively as she enjoyed a moment to herself over a mouse. She thought Snakeblink was silly, he wasn't so good with words and it was good that others had joined in to make sure Cindershade didn't kill him.

She finished her mouse and trotted over, because why not?

"It's okay, Cindershade. I think you are quite attractive!" She said, not necessarily a flirt, but still a complement.

"I've never heard anyone call someone meaty though. That's definitely a first." She added. What was that supposed to mean? Did Snakeblink call her fat? Meaty........

......Weren't they all meaty????

.........

She noticed the glance Iciclepaw made towards Ashpaw. She remained silent... But she did give Iciclepaw a smile that said she totally saw that.

She TOTALLY saw that. How sweet!!!

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[Cindershade]

Poised as still as she was, one could almost mistake her as a statue. She listens as Snakeblink tries to redeem himself, tumbling over his words as he tried to shy away from her. He's not doing a very good job at it. More shit spews over his tongue, earning a warning growl from her as her virdian eyes narrowed. Meaty and vigorous? What the hell was he going on about? "You're not helping your case, Snakeblink." The warrior leans forward further, closing into his personal space. "What are you insinuating? Are you trying to tell me I'm short? Is that it?" Her words grow louder and more venomous, a coiled cobra ready to spring from her position at any given moment.
A few wandering clan mates must have heard her threat, seeing as they're now piling in. Ashpaw bounces her way in, not realizing that she had just stepped into a badgers set. She also offers Hyacinthbreath, but soon realizes Snakeblink's own misuse of wording. Cindershade musters up a snort in reply, her own tongue caught in a vice grip about the silver molly. Houndsnarl ambles up second next to Snakeblink, attempting to diffuse the situation at hand. She spares a glance at him, but her eyes never fully lose sight of the brown tabby tom in case he tries to make a break for it. I doubt he'd know a pretty molly if she was sitting right in front'f him.

A second thought blossoms forth now as she mulls it over for a moment. Snakeblink surely wasn't the brightest among them, not realizing how to shut up when he should or else face the consequences of it. Her paw begins to relax as she brings it back to her chest and stows away her claws, her chin lightly lifted from Houndsnarl's compliment. Even Redpath agreed, saying she was quite attractive.
Cindershade was ready to let it go, to only have Snakeblink scrape by the skin of his teeth from an onslaught of terrible curses and possibly a thrashing. She was ready to move on. Until he started to flap those gums again.
Twin suns of eerily green hellfire stared directly into his emerald pools, velvet ears flattening as thick muscle bunched beneath her. Snakeblink tries to further explain himself, saying the exact opposite of what Houndsnarl was trying to say. How oblivious was he? Oh, she was ready to kill him now. So she wasn't pretty, hm? He didn't know what pretty was? Molten iron poured through her veins as the warrior seethed further into a silent rage, her jaws clenching so hard under the pressure they threatened to splinter off. Iciclepaw was right, he didn't know a pretty molly even if it tore him to shreds. But today was his reckoning and Cindershade was happy to give him a show. Without another word, a shaded paw lashes out towards the brown tabby warrior with claws sheathed. She aimed to slam a paw directly against the back of his cranium, throwing all of her weight into it. She'd not draw a claw to a clan mate, no matter how much those intrusive thoughts edged her on. She didn't hate Snakeblink so much to draw blood, but the warrior needed to learn how to shut the hell up. If he'd have quit while he was ahead, perhaps things would've ended differently. Even if he was joking—things would've ended differently. Maybe she'd have just returned the banter with some of her own. Maybe she should've taken pity on him instead, but that just wasn't her style. Cindershade was never an empathetic individual.
"Just shut the fuck up, idiot. I don't need your kind of help. Not from you, not from anyone!" A slip through the cracks as she retorts, a brief flash of vulnerability creeps into her tone. She locks it up immediately with a deep inhale, finally exhaling after a moment. The warrior was now acutely aware of all their gazes on her as her pelt burned. Suddenly she wants to retract into the trees, to be alone. Maybe she needed to be.
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[ SILENCE IS DEAFENING ]​