camp TOSSING, TURNING ✧ . question

[MORELPAW]

✧ . It’s a foolish worry, that which loops in his head. One that someone Morelpaw’s age should be able to shrug off, to know is simply not true.

The boy isn’t sure quite when the concern first wove its way into his day to day routine — perhaps when he saw his mother mourn the disappearance of her friend, perhaps when news of his disappearance first broke — but what starts small only grows. A needle’s scratch at the back of Morelpaw’s mind turns into talon wounds with each passing moment his namesake fails to return to the clan the stars granted him to lead.

Is he destined to be just like him?

The answer, an unknown. Morelpaw’s mind churns just as his stomach does as he tries to find a solution to the question at all costs. It’s a distraction from his training — a distraction that pulls him away from actually learning.

And it nags at him, tears into him like a burr in his side. Smogstar is gone. Morelpaw’s namesake is gone.

He tries to brush it off, tries to go about his day. But the worry builds and builds, and no longer can he pretend he’s okay, as his paws freeze in front of the fresh-kill pile, as his chest tightens, his heart pounds.

“ Am I… Am I going to disappear too? ” he blurts out to the world, pale eyes wide at the nagging thought now spoken.​

✦ ABOUT

• MORELPAW ✦ AMAB. He / Him. Apprentice of ShadowClan.
  ✧ . A blue tabby and white tom with pale, blue-gray eyes.
  ✧ . Needledrift x Chittertongue ; Adoptive son to Ferndance
  ✧ . Mentored by Briarthorn
  ✧ . Peaceful and healing powerplay permitted!
  ✧ . Penned by Abri ‣ @_abri_ on discord, feel free to dm for plots!
  ✧ . " Speech " ; Attack
  

​

 

[sparrowheart]

The tom was far from a comforting one. So far disconnected from his emotions- but he watched enough, he understood enough- that the much too loud question rang beside him as he was reaching for a sparrow. And at first, the warrior was tempted to move away, but it was too loud, it was too sad and it would be too rude to just move away and avoid this.

He was not a comforting cat .. and barely a whisper would escape him. "No .. no I don't- think so-" but was it a lie to the child? Would they be able to protect morelpaw from fate, from what starclan intended for each of them? "No... You .." his voice faltered, the brown and black tabby frowned, hoping someone would be much more comforting than the placid voice he had. Someone who understood better than he....

"You won't disappear Morelpaw..."

But was it a lie?

​

 

[mistmoth]

✦ Mistmoth had had many moons to become acquainted with thoughts that lingered more than they deserved to, which might make her sound older than she is, but is truly only to say that she's normally dejected. They were like grains of sand caught beneath an eyelid, or grass seeds lodged in a hard to groom spot; though harmless on their face, attention only seemed to worsen the unwanted thoughts, the maladaptive habits surrounding them surviving even after the original irritant has left. Being aware that the thought was ridiculous didn't help. Awareness of the thought was it's own problem, because that was attention, too, and still the thought grew.

She'd never worried that she would disappear or be taken, though. It was an understandable concern, given all that had unfurled in the marshlands, but one she couldn't harbor for herself. Who would want to take Mistmoth? (What mystery would go through the effort of disappearing her?)

But Morelpaw was inquisitive and bright and young, and the tragedy that would surround his disappearance (Stars, she hoped she wasn't willing it into existence just by thinking it) gave his fears some weight in Mistmoth's mind. It made the worry harder to dismiss. "We can't promise that," she sighs in response to Sparrowheart's wavering placation. She prods at her almost finished meal, no longer hungry. Assurances form and dissolve in her mind, nothing quite shaping into what she wants to say, so she settles on adding, "But no one can promise the bad stuff, either - no one can really say that you'll disappear."​

 

[Gigglepaw]

Even with Smogstar having disappeared, her idol gone into the fog that surrounded ShadowClan like a ghost, Gigglepaw hadn't thought that she or any more of her loved ones might also disappear. She was padding after her brother, not thinking anything in particular when he stopped suddenly and she bumped into his rear-end. She blinks, more than usual, and peers at Morelpaw curiously, taking a moment to register his words. Sparrowheart is quicker to the punch in reassuring Morelpaw that no, he won't disappear, but Mistmoth comes along with her own take that nothing is ever certain.

"Is that true?" Gigglepaw asks childishly, ears flattening against her skull as she stared at Mistmoth for a moment, before quickly shaking her head and puffing out her chest. "Actually, that's not right! Morelpaw, you'll never disappear," Gigglepaw turned to flash a smile at her brother, hoping to instill confidence in him, "You'll never disappear, 'cause I'll always be here to make sure you stay!"

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• !
  

• 

• GIGGLEPAW ✩ apprentice of shadowclan, eight moons
  → blinks incessantly & uncontrollably.
  → peaceful and healing powerplay permitted.
  → penned by Archivist → .archivist on discord.
  

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[SHARPSHADOW]

Sharpshadow would be lying if he said he hasn't ever had the same thought.

ShadowClan cats were like mushrooms, appearing, and then disappearing the second you turned your head. ...That metaphor in itself was very ShadowClan, wasn't it? It's a name she could easily see Smogmaw or Ferndance giving their kits, muttering something about how they're yummy, and therefore, would be a good name for their kits... Meanwhile, ThunderClanners walked around with names like... Lightspark, or whatever. Don't even get her started on SkyClanner names... Each of the Clans— they had their own very different things to worry about, didn't they? Loudmouthed as they could be, surely if their cats disappeared as often, they would know?

So... It's not an unreasonable question. No, not at all. The fact that Sharpshadow doesn't have an answer for it right away puts a pit in her stomach. All of them are like that— unsure. Even as Sparrowheart tries vehemently deny it, his stuttering doesn't exactly exude confidence. ( Sharpshadow tries not to wonder- not to worry about if that was how he sounded ). We can't promise that, says Mistmoth, and it's sad that it's true.

No one is sure... No one but Gigglepaw, that is. Sharpshadow often wonders what they've done to deserve someone like her. It's a sort of delusion that could only come from Ferndance's brood, she guesses. ...Strangely, she's thankful.

It'd be good for them to stick in pairs, really. Not because Gigglepaw was imbued with the power to make him stay... or whatever crazy thing she was probably imagining, but because there was strength in numbers. If it brought the same outcome, did the htought really matter...? " Gigglepaw will... will help keep you safe, " he says eventually. He... agrees, sort of. The grimace on his face does not match whatever comfort he wishes he could bring. " If you follow the rules... you shouldn't disappear. You shouldn't. " Not to imply that anyone ever should. Not to imply that at all.​