private VOLATILE // falconheart

They used to play together in the nursery - listen to stories of LionClan and the formation of all that was around them. They became apprentices together, warriors together... And yet in the face of danger, Falconheart runs. Granted, they all did, but this is not the first time the tabby tom escaped without caring much for those he's left behind. Skyclaw used to hold his tongue, for his brother mentored his friend, and surely with time his cowardly nature would simmer out. And then, he disappeared, causing fear and panic within himself and the tom's family. And then... And then...

He sees Duskbird, crumpled on the ground, Burnstorm next to him. The vision is so upsetting, so vivid - and whenever he remembers it, he recalls how Falconheart was also a part of the wolf chase.

It may seem like a leap, to blame his long time friend for the death of his littermate - but the unfortunate truth is that in many ways, he does. He's embittered by life, soured by sorrow. He wakes up several times a night from dreamless naps to see that where Duskbird used to sleep is empty, not even a nest to hold. If it were Falconheart who died instead, would Skyclaw feel this jaded? He isn't sure. It seems that the speckled warrior's fear and lack of bravery has gotten him by yet again by the skin of his teeth, and Skyclaw is... what, jealous?

There's delusion in his actions. His chest hurts more today than it had yesterday - tolerable it is not, for he struggles to even like breathing for hours after having to do so already. His step forward in including his family in his life is amended by several steps back. First, condemning Palefire with his own cold flame of a heart, and now confronting Falconheart, with teeth grit and tears pricking the corners of his eyes.

They're hunting, casually, in the woods. It's as if nothing has happened, when everything has instead. "Falconheart," he breathes out. He mimics scenting the air, listening for prey, before turning his solemn gaze towards his 'friend.' "Where did you go that day?" He asks. "When wolves invaded camp. You disappeared - your mother, she was worried sick," he poses the questions as if he's simply curious, however Falconheart should know that pain and frustration lay desperately behind each syllable.​
 
𓍊𓋼 The past few days have been tumultuous, a never-ending rainstorm of loss and pain. Acornwish, Jackdawflight, Sunfreckle, Batwing… Duskbird. Howlingstar only survived the wolves with the aid of her extra lives, but none of the others had been so lucky. And Duskbird… he can’t stop thinking about the sickening crunch, the horror of watching a life ended—permanently—before his very eyes. He couldn’t have done anything, though, just like he couldn’t have done anything about Sandthorn’s death. He can justify his inaction by saying that he could have done nothing to prevent his peers’ deaths, but in the end, it all comes back around to him. He could have done something, but didn’t. If only he was faster, if only he wa stronger, if only he was better-

With a start, Falconheart lifts his head when his name is called. "Yeah?" He questions, turning to look at the other warrior. Skyclaw has always been a good friend, he thinks, even if his thoughts sometimes wander a bit further than that. Right now, though, Skyclaw is grieving; he knows this. There’s no way he isn’t mourning the loss of his twin. But at least he hadn’t had to see it happen, right? So why does he look so pained now, as he asks where Falconheart went when the wolf pack attacked their camp?

The cream tabby doesn’t know what to say in response. Bicolored eyes widen with surprise, and pale paws shift uncomfortably in place. "I… uh, I didn’t mean to disappear." He didn’t. Still, he doesn’t know what he meant to do when he was running from the camp. He hadn’t thought of anyone else, fear and panic clouding any reasoning in his mind. "I don’t know… I just went up a—a tree. I don’t…" he trails off, averting his eyes from the tortoiseshell-patched tom. Shame is an unwelcome weight upon his shoulders, a half-shed pelt that he feels unable to shake off.