private wash the blood off our hands ( cinder )

[honey]

Was it selfish to deny Pollen from following after her, to deny her own children? In her mind, it wasn't. She was saving them from her fate, because it seems wherever she goes misery follows. It shows, with her mother being taken away, with being torn away from her home by those stupid fucking star cats, to stepping down because of her crimes and still getting exiled. Misfortune seemed to love her, seems to claw at the very innings of her throat, tear her inside out. She loves them, so thats why she had to go. Shes a danger. She can only hope that one day, Pollen and her children could forgive her for all that she has sinned with. But could she be angry?

If theres one cat she didn't expect to see, its Cinderfrost. Inwardly, she knows what has happened, that the shadowclan leader has gotten to her too. She doesn't want to engage in conversation, but she does anyways, tired eyes looking the other medicine cat up and down. "...You too, huh?" she feels like shes moons old, so tired, so tired... And this molly, despite their differences, is the only one that knows her grievances. She hasn't felt an embrace in days, and shes so lonely that she stumbles towards her, trying to rest her face on the girls shoulder.

// @cinderfrost ​

"speech"​

 

[salamander]

Exiled twice: once by her own will and once by her own actions. "Justice". A concept she thought she understood, a sentiment that caused her demise. Did she ever truly understand "justice"? Well, she knew what was unjust; biased judgements and the spillage of innocent blood. The former she experienced while the latter she actively partook in. To deem herself judge, jury, and executioner had been silly and unwise. It'd been downright selfish. Ash warned her and she ignored his wishes.

Pitch reflected what she'd morphed into after the Great Battle. A maniactic monster with bloodshot, vengeance crazed eyes. Emberstar.. Like Ash said, she hadn't needed to be ruthlessly slain that day. It was an obvious statement yet one she still struggled to fully accept. Why, oh why, did no one care that the ThunderClan leader protected a full-grown cat who chose a child as their victim?

Time went by without much acknowledgement until the full moon emerged in the sky. It signified a half-moon since her banishment. She already looked like hell: malnourished and exhausted. Damaged paws caused her to fail more than succeed in hunts. But even when she caught her intended prey, her stomach rejected the food.

Sullen eyes looked up as a familiar, warm scent caressed her nostrils. "You too, huh?" The blue mink awkwardly flinched at the touched but eventually remained still, allowing Honeytwist to rest her head up on her shoulders.

She remained silent until she asked, voice ever so small, "Wh-What did you mean?" No, it couldn't be. Her head hung in shame. Like herself, Honeytwist lost two of her homes. At the center of both events was the blue molly herself. "I'm sorry."
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[honey]

Does she cry? Does she cry that the clans have forsaken them? Does she cry about Starclan and their foolish tests, their beyond stupid decisions? Would she be here if Starclan never spoke up? She fights back tears, fights back a scream of frustration that has threatened to bubble up so many times, the urge to just slump against Cinder and sob, and sob, and sob. What did you mean? Her voice feels so far away. Underwater, heated, gargled.

"Sootstar." she breathes. Its all she has to say about it, all she can muster up without breaking. "I left behind everything." finally the tears leak, especially once Cinder apologizes. Its not the blue mollys fault for her own grievances, for the sinful pull of claws, for flashing teeth. If she could go back in time, she would. She'd stop herself, she'd stop Cinder, stop Cinder, stop.... She lets out a shaky breath, collapsing against the ground with a small huff. So tired, she hasn't slept, so tired, so tired. Tired. Tired. Tired.

Eyes land upon Cinders paws and shes scooting forwards, using up most of the energy she has just to get a look at them. "Oh... Dearest...." her voice is a barely audible coo, and its obvious shes succumbing to delirium. "Who did this to you?"​

"speech"​

 

[salamander]

A pregnant Honeytwist lost her home when StarClan cruelly evicted her from SkyClan. Why? Why did they send such a sweet, innocent cat to the bloodied claws of a tyrant? Why had they even approved of Sootstar in the first place? Though she knew she'd been discarded, she still bitterly begged the stars for an explanation. At the very least, Honeytwist should have been ThunderClan's medicine cat. She would have been the perfect fit and it'd allow her to visit SkyClan. So why, why, why?!

Blood boiled hot but exhaustion quickly drained the anger away. She lacked the energy to yowl at the stars and demand answers. It was fine that they cut her off but to allow WindClan to carelessly toss Honeytwist away?

And why did Bone feed Honeytwist's name to the wolves?

"WindClan are nothing more than feral cats. They didn't deserve you. And StarClan is no better for separating you from your family while not protecting you against the lunatic they approved as leader." Fur bristled and her body shook. "We should go to the Moonstone. You deserve answers. They owe you answers and apologies."

Teal eyes drifted down to her deformed paws when Honeytwist inquired about them. "A branch coated with embers." Embers.. Emberstar. How was ThunderClan doing? She sank into Honeytwist. These injuries were a punishment from StarClan and a reminder of the ugly monster she transformed into.
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[honey]

Windclan are nothing but feral cats, she almost laughed, theres a snrrk, and she does laugh, she busts out laughing like never before, as if it were meant to be a joke (her whole life she has been kind, so good, the stars, the stars, god forsake the stars). "I stepped down you know! And I still got punished." she still laughs, its the funniest thing she has heard in eons. "They would not answer." her face turns serious, her tail bushing up, "A sinner, Cinder, thats what I am. Nothing more, nothing less. They play cruel jokes. I- I don't..." I don't even know if the father of my children is alive. She chokes, because now without her, they only have Pollen. They have lost both of their parents.

Cinder speaks of her injuries and Honey hums, attempting to guide Cinder's scarred paws in to hers. "Have you tried poppy seeds? Have they hurt you lately? I'll go and fetch some cool water here soon... Stay with me." the last part is spoken out of desperation, fear, shes so scared of being alone with her thoughts once more. "Sometimes I wonder how Dandelionpaw is doing, how my children are, how my girl is." I'm sorry, i'm sorry, she fights the drying tears from reigniting the same sob from before. "Did you ever take an apprentice..?"​

"speech"​

 

[salamander]

"Look at me." she quietly demanded. "You are not a sinner. What Blazestar said, what cats have whispered, have proven that a lot of the cats their are feral. Yet, StarClan hasn't forsaken them. They haven't punished WindClan nor Soot for their sins."

Eyes pleaded with Honey to understand, to throw away such a silly notion. Her reflection showed what a true sinner looked like. "Besides, if every cat was deemed a sinner for little spats then StarClan wouldn't exist." Still, why hadn't StarClan done anything to protect their chosen one? "You should go to the Moonstone and see if you can still communicate with them. They owe you an explanation. You were specifically called to WindClan by StarClan themselves. At the very least, they owe you an apology."

"I won't leave." she assured because she didn't want to be alone either. She acted like isolation didn't affect her but it did. "They were burned in the fire when I tried to move a branch. Poppy seeds caused too much drowsiness. I wouldn't be able to properly attend to my patients. i'm fine." she lied but hid it well.

Awkwardly, she tried to drape her tail around Honey's shoulders. Expressing and reacting to emotions had always been a struggle for the she-cat. I'm sure they're fine. Perhaps we can poke around and find one of them." Unfortunately, that was all she offered. "I chose an apprentice the day Pitch arrived. I thought he'd only visit ThunderClan: Bone and I have a history. I didn't.. You barely touched her. I should've been the sole target of their ire."

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