WHEN IT WAS NOW [✦] howlfire

[LITTLE WOLF]

Little Wolf does not know how it happened, one moment she is stalking a squirrel through the underbrush, creeping up on the creature with silent paws, her dark pelt blending in with the shadows around her and her green eyes flashing with anticipation. The moment before the kill was always the most tense. She could feel her muscles bunch up as she gathered them in preparation to leap, but, as fate would have it, the wind shifts. The squirrel catches it a moment before she does, its nose turning up in the air and then, at the same time that she is about to pounce the creature breaks out into a run. Quickly, she scrambles to pursue. Soon, however, she is finding herself in a painfully familiar part of the forest and suddenly, she has to draw to a stop. She skids a tiny bit, legs threatening to slip out from under her as she slides on the leaf-litter that is slick with morning dew. She curses under her breath as she watches the squirrel dart up a tree on the other side of that invisible line. If it had been back in the day, back when the Marsh Group still ruled the forest alone, she would have been free to give chase and kill that squirrel. It would have been prey for her clan, for her kits but now... She stares at the tree mournfully for a couple more minutes. Her own daughter had died at this very border and over what? A few measly scraps of fur. She would find another she reasoned.

Still, there is something that keeps her rooted to that spot, a profound sadness that resides in her chest, tugging at her heart, when she looks out into the familiar pines. For a moment she can almost pretend it is last green-leaf. Her kits had yet to be born and she was coming here to meet with the cream-colored tom she had so quickly grown so fond of. They would go to their special place together, the secluded grotto where they would lay together and exchange honeyed words. Those times were long behind them now though. All that was left in this place were the ghosts of a past she mourned.

With a sad sigh she is about to turn away, lamenting all the things she has lost here, but as her shaded features turn away from the border she hears the crack of a stick breaking and immediately her head spins back around to gaze out into the forest "Is someone there?" she calls out hesitantly. A small part of her hopes, for a moment, that she would run into one of her SkyClan kits, but she knows the chances are slim and so she waits with baited breath for whoever, or whatever, was lurking in the bushes to show themselves.

@Howlfire
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[Howlfire]

One of the joys of being a warrior now was that Howlfire could actually leave camp on her own. No mentor or other warrior necessary. She was free to come and go as she pleased...within reason of course.

She was outside of camp today, practising her hunting crouches, and otherwise seeing the sights. Howlfire was aware that she was close to ThunderClan's border but tried not to think about it too much. As much as she loved her ThunderClan kin and the home she once had there, she had conflicted feelings about it too. She was still haunted by the cruel words spoken to her by her siblings and the news her mother had had another litter, the latter of which had indirectly led to her time in the Shelter.

Howlfire was practising pouncing when she stepped on a fallen twig, the brittle branch snapping beneath her paw. She did not react to it at first, only cringing slightly when she heard a voice call out. Stars, had she interrupted a ThunderClan hunting patrol? And then a moment passed and she realised she recognised that voice. Little Wolf. Her heart skipped a beat and she hesitated, not sure whether she wanted to step out or simply leave her mother there.

In the end, she chose to step out.

"Mom..." Her voice was shaky as she stepped out from behind a pine tree. Little Wolf was largely the same as she always, but Howlfire had changed, having grown and now possessing a warrior name since the last time they saw each other. "It's just me," Howlfire mewed. "Did I disturb you?"​

 

[LITTLE WOLF]

“Mom” the word makes her heart thrum against her chest like a bird trapped underneath one of her claws, desperate to be free. When Howlfire steps out into the open her eyes swim with pride. They had, of course, seen each other at gatherings past but she had not been chosen to attend the one where the announcement of her warrior name had been made, had not been able to tell her daughter how proud she was of her. "Howlfire…" she says, the first time she has addressed her daughter as such.

She comes right up to the line, careful not to step over it, but if Howlfire was close enough and receptive she would lean over and press her nose to her daughters cheek. "I heard about your new name from Burnstorm," newly named, he had been there. She had watched him leave, padding after Roeflame like a lost kit. "Its a good name, your father chose well" in the back of her mind, she remembers how Moonpaw had reacted when she had brought up Blazestar and she feels a pinprick of worry that Howlfire would act similarly. Just as quickly though she wipes the notion from her mind. Her other daughter held no such venom towards their father in her heart. "Im so proud of you" she says, her voice cracking as a purr interrupts her words and her eyes swim with tears. Her kits.. all grown up. She wishes Morningpaw was there to receive her warrior name with them but she comforts herself by telling herself the tortoiseshell she cat was looking down on them from the stars, watching over and guiding them, that she was happy for them, proud of them too, even.
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[Howlfire]

Howlfire had kept her distance at first. She was nervous, unsure of what to say or how to properly act around her mother after so long. But hearing her mother call her name - her full name - she can't help but surge forward, having to quite literally fight the urge not to cross the border to greet her properly. Howlfire supposed it would suffice just to have her mother press her nose against her cheek.

"He chose well," Howlfire agreed with a nod. She had always wondered what her full warrior name might be when the time come. She had always had a few ideas bouncing around that she liked but even she had to admit that none fit her quite so well as the one her father chose for her. "All we need now is for Fireflypaw and Moonpaw to receive their names and we'll all be grown up, huh?" Howlfire remarks, her purs joining with her mother. She tries to ignore the lie in her words. All of us except for Morningpaw. Howlfire pulls away for a moment and stares at her mother. "I...miss you," She chokes out. There is more she wanted to say, but in that moment all the anger and grief melts away. "How are you? Are you well?"​

 

[LITTLE WOLF]

Howlfire comes to meet her and Little Wolf relishes in the contact for as long as her chocolate coated daughter would allow, eyes closing as she pretends, just for a moment, that they are unseparated by that invisible line in the earth, that they are in the same clan and that perhaps just maybe hunting together. It is a fantasy that Little Wolf craves more than anything, her family being whole again. But when she opens her eyes, when the daydream breaks, there may as well be a thorn barrier between them. She does not know the intricacies of her daughters life, who she was friends with, who she cared for, what she filled her days with now that she was a warrior.

She agrees with her about her fathers choice and a warm smile alights on her face. It is refreshing to speak to one of her children about Blazestar without hearing about how much they loathed the cat she had once loved with all her heart. "I miss you too" she says, feeling that familiar tug on her heart strings when she thinks of her SkyClan kits.

"I'm... okay" she says, mind racing with all the recent losses. Ragwortpaw, Graystorm, and then Moonpaws harsh words echo in her head. "Moonpaw and I had a bit of a fight recently" she admits with a small shrug of her shoulders "But that is neither here nor there" with a wave of her tail she dismisses that part of the conversation. "Please Howlfire tell me about your life, what's your favorite thing about being a warrior?"
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[Howlfire]

Her mother says she's okay and Howlfire can't help but give her a sceptical glance. Howlfire is well aware of certain tragedies her mother had faced, so she can't help but wonder if her mother is lying or just saying that to put them both at ease.

"You had a fight with Moonpaw?" Howlfire echoes, raising a brow. Despite her own awkwardness with her sister, she is surprised to hear of a fight between her and their mother. A part of her wants to pry, curious about what might have set Moonpaw off, but she decides against it. No need to sour the tone of the conversation.

It seems Little Wolf is also keen to move on from that, quickly asking about Howlfire's life instead. "To be honest, sometimes there doesn't feel like there's much of a difference between being an apprentice and now a warrior!" Howlfire admitted with a laugh. "I admit I like the certain freedom that comes with being a warrior. That I can leave do stuff outside of camp without a mentor hovering over me. It also feels good to be reunited with my friends who had become warriors before me...Figfeather, Chrysaliswing, and Coyotecrest. Coyotecrest was really helpful in helping me settle down when I moved into the warriors den. It was a bit of a strange change but he allowed me to put my nest next to his."​