sensitive topics when the grip leaves your hand - death

[reedbite.]

a bitter air pushed further into the coat of the warrior as she pressed forward. snow settled on her shoulders, seeping into her bones. but she was determined. she was determined to bring something back. her teeth chattered, and her pawpads ached. the storm was unrelenting, but so was she.

there were more mouths every day to feed. she wasn't friendly out loud, but she did care. the bite in her words were empty lies compared to her loyalty to her clan. to the worry that filled her mind. a repeating songbird that uttered whispers of how she could be doing more.

she should be doing more.

reedbite could hardly see anymore as the frosted winds froze her whiskers and a sneeze escaped her body. I... really should go home, now, she finally thought. brown fur shook, trying desperately to rid her body of the cold flakes that were beginning to coat her. when she turned around, her paw steps were gone. she should be able to navigate this place practically blind, but she had never been this blinded.

her jaw began to hurt from chattering teeth. maybe, I just need to find somewhere to escape the storm, she thought instead. heterochromic eyes squinted, pushing forward to find anywhere that may provide safety. she /had/ to find something nearby...

she had houndtooth to go back to. she had a clan she called her family, even if it was merely in her mind. she had reasons to perservere, and she pushed on as the winds blasted towards her, and her body fought against it.

but her lungs ached, her mind felt groggy. her limbs were heavy, and all she wanted was to go back home. maybe... right here would suffice.

---

a coat of brown and silvered fur would be found curled up next to a fallen log, frozen stiff from the storm the day before. there was no warmth to her body, no signs of breath. just a few feet away was the safety she desperately searched for during the snowstorm. she looked to finally be at peace, something the warrior had not allowed herself to appear for a long time.



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[Moonbeam]

*slight descriptions of the body in the starred paragraph

The snow storm the night before had caused Moonpaw to worry, the fear of the deadly leafbares she'd heard so much about ringing in her mind as she had looked out into camp to see almost nothing, the thick snowflakes raining down from the sky causing only shapes to be seen before her, unable to make out who was around her unless she got very close. She'd stayed within the safety of the medicine cat's den, fear that she'd get stuck somehow in the snow and not be able to be found, white fur camouflaging her to the point of being invisible in such weather.

It wasn't until the next day when the snow stopped and everyone awoke from their cold slumber that Moonpaw got to know properly who hadn't been able to make it back to camp, and she could only hope as she trek through the territory that Reedbite would be fine and had found shelter. She had been silently praying to StarClan when brown clumps of fur reached her eyes and hopeful gaze quickly turned to mournful as she neared. "Reedbite?" The apprentice found herself choking out, sliding forward in the snow as she moved closer and moved a paw to touch the other.

* Paw reeled back as she got no give, no movement of fur or body part as she touched the frozen body and a small whimper couldn't help but leave Moonpaw's throat. She'd never seen something like this before, even in the height of Yellowcough those that had died could still properly be moved, still be buried and warm and not... this. "S-someone help me carry her, we gotta get her back home." The small girl choked out once more, stumbling over words as her brain tried to process this, process what she could do what she was supposed to do. "Someone should uh... go ahead and make sure they know, make sure to hide the kits in the nursery they shouldn't have to see this." They'd learn about death eventually but not like this, it should never be like this.

I WISH PLANT LIFE ꕥ WOULD GROW ALL AROUND ME

• 

• MOONPAW formerly Ratpaw || NPC x NPC || sister to Rowanpaw || apprentice to Ravensong.
  -- She/Her || 8 moons old, ages every 17th
  -- smaller than average, small rounded ears. SH white masking cinnamon torbie with orange eyes.
  -- soft-spoken, often found humming, tries to comfort others by smiling

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[Silverbreath]

*+:｡.｡ Silverbreath had never had the pleasure of getting to know Reedbite...and now he never would.

The realization was an icicle to the chest, the settling weight of an eternity of missed opportunities a heavy one to bear. Silverbreath felt his namesake catch in his throat as he stumbled up beside Moonpaw, having joined her on patrol to search for the unfortunate stragglers that hadn't made it home in time. His heart ached that it had to be Moonpaw who discovered the body - although her career fated her to be at the forefront in dealing with the worst tragedies, it didn't make it any easier to accept someone so young having to work so closely with death and illness. But this was her choice, and one he didn't want to treat lightly by trying to shield her from truths she probably understood far better than he ever could.
Still, he would briefly lay his tail on Moonpaw's shoulders, his frown shaky as he imagined Carp-paw in her place. As he imagined Carp-paw in Reedbite's place. Shaking the dreadful thought away, the tom would step closer to Reedbite. "Rest in peace, brave huntress" he would murmur quietly into her unhearing ear. To die hunting for your clan...he could think of very few more honorable ways to go. But, Starclan, how unfair it was even still.
" I'll help carry her home" he murmurs, taking his place on Reedbite's other side. He hesitates for a moment, before attempting to grab her scruff. Unnaturally cold, like trying to bite into snow that had since lost its softness to an overnight freeze. He couldn't help but reflect on his state of being just then - his paw pads so cold they practically burned, his short coat that did nothing to protect his skin from the elements, let alone his more sensitive ears, nose, and belly. The weakness growing in his muscles every day from a stomach he couldn't guarantee would be filled even after expending so much energy to the hunt. If he wasn't careful, he and Reedbite might get to know each other better sooner rather than later...Starclan, he couldn't leave this world until he saw his little girl earn her warrior name. He refused.

*+:｡.｡ Updated 12/15/23

• 
  
  
• 
  
  
  
  GENERAL:
  ☮ Silverbreath
  ☮ DMAB— He/Him — Bisexual
  ☮ 35 moons — Ages 1 moon every month real-time
  ☮ Father to Carp-paw, Mentoring Goldenpaw
  ☮ Riverclan — Warrior
  
  
  
  
  
  
  COMBAT:
  ☮Physically hard | mentally hard
  ☮ Attack in bold #7d7d7d
  injuries: None currently

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[DAWNSTORM]

die with memories , not dreams .
︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

He stared, unblinking at brown clumps of fur, unmoving, never again. A breath shuddered out, turning his helm away from the body to peer at Moonpaw and Silverbreathe. “No longer cold.” He spoke, returning his gaze to Reedbite’s frigid frame, blinking languidly.

Dawnstorm had nearly plowed over her, fearing she had something in her ears that shouldn’t have been there, and now—He frowned. This time, he couldn’t help but remember StarClan, a concept still foreign to the tom of cats with transparent pelts that hide in the stars. Was she one of them? He hoped so, even if the tom still felt a tad bit skeptical. She would be warmer there. He hoped. Dawnstorm didn’t know what StarClan looked like, or was she still there with them, watching?

Shuffling on his paws, the chimera pivoted away from the body, bi-colored hues staring out toward camp. “Tell them.” He offered, pushing forward on steady paws toward camp, gut-churning from yesterday’s meal.

The kits. The ones he helped bring into camp. The ones still unnamed. They’re still in camp. Still clueless. And he wished, for a split second, that they never would. With a slow exhale, Dawnstorm hurried along, slipping into camp, mumbling to a passerby, bringing in a corpse, he would say, gesturing toward the nursery with a soft can’t see and hope that would suffice. ​

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thought speech​