I MISS YOU, JUDAS ✦ doeblaze

[DOEBLAZE]

PENNED BY DEJAVU ✦ HEARTCHART • PINTEREST • PLAYLIST

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[DOEBLAZE]

aesthetics .
the fleeing form of a white deer; the gunmetal eyes of a big cat in the dark; an antlered shadow behind a veil; the windswept mane of a wild horse; the swan curve of a neck; daggers with white - steel handles; a crumpled paper shooting target; a strand of broken pearls; scratched hands cupping wildflowers; porcelain limbs; bruised knuckles pressed together; a curved back sprouting eagle wings; the immaculate heart of mary; a deer in a wolf's skin; knighthood.

playlist . not a lot, just forever – adrianne lenker fourth of july – sufjan stevens king and lionheart – of monsters and men i saw you in a dream – the japanese house angel landing – pretty sick hitherto – cocteau twins lover of tantalus – sun is poison seventeen – sharon van etten visions of you – steinza i bet on losing dogs – mitski rises the moon – liana flores gilded lily – cults the moon will sing – the crane wives soldier, poet, king – the oh hellos infinity – jaymes young domestic bliss – glass animals is it really you? – loathe back to the old house – the smiths how to never stop being sad – dandelion hands death is a girl – skippocalyptic waiting room – phoebe bridgers sunsetz – cigarettes after sex black sheep – metric & brie larson love songs on the radio – mojave 3 blank – glare softcore – the neighbourhood selfness – sun is poison two good things – modern baseball midnight garden – and also the trees when will i see you again – shakka the diner – billie eilish a month or two – odie leigh notion – the rare occasions strongest – ina wroldsen king – florence + the machine that's life – frank sinatra young and beautiful – lana del rey genesis – grimes sparks – coldplay forever young – alphaville back of my heat – the beaches running up that hill – kate bush willow – taylor swift vienna – billy joel lovely – billy eilish snap out of it – arctic monkeys sadeness – enigma sonne – rammstein iris – the goo goo dolls bloody mary – lady gaga army dreamers – kate bush beach life in death – glass beach k. – cigarettes after sex sober to death – car seat headrest dogs of the sea – sun is poison born a blond – sun is poison untitled soul – lady lamb brazil – declan mckenna sleep thru ur alarms – lontalius older – searows again & again – the bird and the bee choking on flowers – fox academy show me how – men i trust i will be the world – blaenavon i know you – faye webster did you know there's a tunnel under ocean bld – lana del rey to be of use – smog does not believe in death – ylayali end of beginning – djo out of touch – daryl hall & john oates from the subway train – vansire tek it – cafuné after dark – mr. kitty dog days are over – florence + the machine hayloft II – mother mother the good in me – jon bellion kings & queens – ava max my kind of woman – mac demarco patron saint – regina spektor anything – adrianne lenker i wait for you – alex g greener where you are – sun is poison arcade – duncan laurence don't blame me – taylor swift half return – adrianne lenker pistol kisser – sun is poison

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1 . APPEARANCE 2 . MENTALITY 3 . INTERACTION 4 . RELATIONSHIPS ✦

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  ❝ The heart is a fist. / It pockets prayer or holds rage. ( Joy Harjo ; An American Sunrise. ) ❞

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  ✦ • A SMALL, SCARRED LILAC TABBY AND WHITE SHE-CAT WITH A LONE GREEN EYE.

  

  Deerish is one of the first words that comes to mind when one looks at her, rendering her name visibly apt. The spareness of her tucked waist and the length of her limbs suggests a doe, but the powerful muscle that has returned to her limbs and taut - wound shoulders with a vengeance pulls towards the wolfish. She is compact and weathered, and she wears her body like a well - loved suit of armor; lived - in and blurred at the edges, shaggy in the manner of a cat with heavier stressors piled upon her shoulders. The impression one gets is wholly that of a well - tamed wildness, weariness worn in a motherly sort of way.
  
  The roundness her face naturally bears has been forced to give way to a sparer jaw and more carved cheeks than she once wore, as if she's pared herself down, bundled herself tightly to weather the storm. Hollowed features are expressive, and she wears her thoughts on her face—most often in the form of flinty eye and grim - set muzzle, bearing an ever - present twitch to her jaw. Rough scar tissue marks her left side like a star's wild burst, eye given way to a vacant socket hidden by an instinctive closing of the eye, claw marks raking down her cheek and catching stray on her chin. The eye that remains is of a paling seaglass - green warmth, given to twist into a cool chunk of jade or a lush tropical pit depending on how the light catches it—at sunset, it bears cruel pinpricks of maroon reflected back.
  
  Her pelt is a tapestry of varying earth hues and ever - growing frecklings of salt; the palest lilac tint only touches the ragged fur that lines her cheeks, now, but it once held sway over her underbelly. Tawny stripes feather over her strong limbs and trail down her cheeks like permanent tear - stains, the same color blooming dark along the bridge of her nose and the shells of her torn ears. A slightly deepened lilac hangs shaggily across her back in a heavy, wolfish lining of fur down her tight - wound spine, giving way to her short, white - dipped tail, as the retreating flag of a fleeing doe. Ivory is ever - spreading, freckling distinctively along her back and face, dipping her limbs and belly, and wholly submerging her wild white mane.
  

  

  
  

  SCARS:
  • Spring 2023 • Dog bite scars on her right foreleg and left hind leg, heavily faded; from a pre - SkyClan off - screen dog attack. •
  • 06 . 14 . 2023 • Scattered scars across her right side, heavily faded; from a dog attack.
  • 10 . 02 . 2023 • Talon scars across her neck and shoulders, faded; from an eagle attack.
  • 01 . 07 . 2024 • Claw scars across her lower back, faded; from a rogue attack.
  • 01 . 29 . 2024 • Torn ears and a lost left eye; from Harrierstripe, after Blazestar's murder.

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  o n e . t w o . t h r e e .

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    ❝ And perhaps it is the greater grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone. ( Madeline Miller ; The Song of Achilles. ) ❞

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    tba​
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    ❝ And perhaps it is the greater grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone. ( Madeline Miller ; The Song of Achilles. ) ❞

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    ✦ INFJ ( THE ADVOCATE ) • ☼ • ☾ • ↑ • XVIII. THE MOON • NEUTRAL GOOD

    ON MATTERS OF THE SELF:
    Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    
    ON MATTERS OF FAITH:
    Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    
    ON MATTERS OF PRINCIPLE:
    Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    
    ON MATTERS OF THE HEART:
    Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak. Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.​
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    ❝ And perhaps it is the greater grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone. ( Madeline Miller ; The Song of Achilles. ) ❞

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    ✦ TV TROPE • TV TROPE • TV TROPE • TV TROPE • TV TROPE

    MANNERISMS:
    • Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    • Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    • Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    • Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    • Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    • Yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak.
    
    

    PREFERENCES:
    

    likes .
    • Thing.
    • Thing.
    • Thing.
    • Thing.
    

    dislikes .
    • Thing.
    • Thing.
    • Thing.
    • Thing.

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  o n e . t w o .

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    ❝ Enduring things is what you do best. Gritting your teeth and bearing them. ( Han Kang ; Human Acts. ) ❞

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    ✦ WIDOWED • PANSEXUAL MONOGAMIST • NOT LOOKING
    ⤷ An easily made acquaintance, yet difficult to truly befriend; romance is ostensibly impossible. Hers is an ire difficult to earn, but furious once invited.
    ⤷ Paranoid and wary, her trust is as easily startled away as her namesake. Difficult to obtain, but once earned, it comes with limitless devotion.
    ⤷ Does not appreciate romantic advances. Likely to intentionally ( or not ) ignore such overtures.

    INTERACTION :
    • Open to interaction, friends, enemies, one - sided crushes; closed to romance, severe injury, death.
    • Smells of pine needles and lavender, a scent often associated with grief.
    • Sounds like low, husky, and somewhat raspy; her voice gives the impression of perpetual weariness. Very faint Southern accent. Voice claim is Charlie Cale ( Poker Face ).
    • Speech is #A52534; thoughts are italicized; contact and combat is underlined.
    
    COMBAT :
    • A poor fighter characterized by efficient ideas but lackluster execution. Actively working to improve her lacking combat skills, and does her best work when fueled by powerful emotion.
    • ( Usually ) won't start fights; will end fights; won't flee; may show mercy; will kill.
    victims .
    ⤷ Killed Harrierstripe on 01 . 29 . 2024 • UNDER THAT SKY, WE WILL REUNITE.​
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    ❝ Enduring things is what you do best. Gritting your teeth and bearing them. ( Han Kang ; Human Acts. ) ❞

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    ✦ DOEBLAZE's STATS :
    

    strength . ✦ ✦ ✧ ✧ ✧
    dexterity . ✦ ✦ ✦ ✧ ✧
    constitution . ✦ ✦ ✦ ✧ ✧
    hunting . ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✧
    tracking . ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦
    combat . ✦ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧
    climbing . ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

    + proficient • climbing, tracking, hunting, diplomacy – lacking • weaving, long - distance running, combat, swimming

    STRENGTHS :
    ⤷ lion's heart . tba
    ⤷ hell - bent . tba
    ⤷ bloodhound . tba
    ⤷ eagle's wings . tba
    
    WEAKNESSES :
    ⤷ mourning dove . tba
    ⤷ hell hath no fury . tba
    ⤷ blunted claws . tba
    ⤷ fish out of water . tba​
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  ❝ This is how I am. This is how love is—infinite time. Thankless and self - destructive. ( Marina Tsvetaeva ; Letters Summer 1926. ) ❞

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  ✦ CHAMPAGNE xx THOMAS • GENERATION 1
  ⤷ Older sister to Bloomfur.
  ⤷ Raised by her mother alone, and helped in raising her younger sister.

  RELATIONSHIPS :
  family .
  • Widow to Blazestar; former mate to Duke. Long - faded girl crush on Orangestar.
  • Mother to Lupinesong, Drowsynose, and Crowsight by Duke; and to Lionpaw, Candorpaw, and Hollypaw by Blazestar.
  • Previously a foster mother to Plaguepaw.
  education .
  • Shadowed Blazestar.
  • Mentoring Cloudypaw and Bloody Mary.
  • Previously mentored Blazingheart and Primrose.
  
  OPINIONS :
  ♥︎ friends . Blazestar†, Yukio†, Duskpool, Tiggerbounce, Twitchbolt, Sparrowsong, Drizzlepelt, Mottledove†, Dogbite, Orangestar, Butterflytuft, Johnnyflame
  loves . Blazestar†, Lupinesong, Drowsynose, Crowsight, Lionpaw, Candorpaw, Hollypaw
  trusts . Blazestar†
  admires . Orangestar, Twitchbolt
  likes . Greeneyes, Chalk, Sootspritespark†, Thistleback, Periwinklebreeze, Mosspool, Sharpshadow, Gentlestorm, Smogstar, Honeysplash, Fireflyglow, Howlfire
  mixed feelings . Burnstorm, Silversmoke
  dislikes . Slate, Dawnglare†, Mallowlark†, Figfeather, Skyclaw†, Raccoonstripe
  ✘ enemies . Duke, Kyungmin†, Beetleback, Sootstar†, Harrierstripe†​

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