DEAD FLOWERS IN THE SAND [ blazestar ]

[sheepcurl]

She knew of his excursion deep in to the place she called her first home, the twoleg place. Deep in to the city with the mean kitties, returning to announce the meeting- she wonders if he knew of what had happened here, with the dogs, the injuries. He dismisses the meeting and shes left there with the same bitter feeling as when she had first approached, when she had spotted Red and Deer, the loathing emotion, heavy in her chest. She claws the ground absentmindedly- she had told Greenpaw they'd do everything soon enough, but she had to take a walk first. She watches Blazestars every move and as soon as shes close enough she rises to her paws.

"Ay," she aims to stop him with a soft meow, she considers him a friend but doesn't she consider everyone a friend? She doesn't like this feeling, she hasn't felt it ever in her life, does not know what it is and she swallows hard to get her mind back on track. "Blazestar, want to take a walk? I was just ready to head out myself, figured it'd be good for company- annnnd... You can tell me about that girl of yours, hm?" her eyes glitter with playfulness, amusement but she feels nothing of the sort. In reality, the camp feels suffocating and for the first time in a while she feels as if she has made a mistake coming here, the reason being something she couldn't quite place; Blazestar had been a former kittypet, had heard the rumors, perhaps he'd have some 'leader-ly insight' for her.

// @BLAZESTAR ​

"speech"​

 

[BLAZESTAR]

Blazestar blinks at the tawny warrior, her approach unexpected but not unwelcome. A walk sounded nice, after all, and it had felt like moons since he'd been able to do something casually, even if he is still sore. He's about to agree with her when she says, "You can tell me about that girl of yours, hm?" The flame point ducks his head, immediately bashful.

"Of... of course we can take a walk," he murmurs, ears flattening in embarrassment. Is it really such big news that he'd taken a mate? Perhaps his Clanmates have always seen him as celibate, or maybe even too hopeless to couple with another cat. He supposes he's never had much interest in it before Little Wolf, so he can't blame anyone for being surprised.

He flicks his tail tip against her flank and begins to limp toward the camp exit. "Probably can't go too far -- hope you're okay with that," he murmurs, giving her an apologetic look. "I... in the Twolegplace..." He hesitates. He hasn't told anyone what had happened yet - those who know are the cats who were there, no one else. But his Clanmates deserved to know, didn't they? "I lost a life," he confesses. "The leg isn't broken, I don't think, but it's still not right yet."

He brushes this off, noting the earlier concern he'd seen in the she-cat's eyes. Churrodream, in his experience, is normally a cheerful she-cat... what could have happened? "Are you okay, though? You seem... down." He peers at her, curious.
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PENNED BY MARQUETTE​

 

[sheepcurl]

She flicks an ear as she watches him dip his head, the grin still ever-present on her face. Theres that same twisting feeling that digs in to her chest with vicious claws, dragging her down to icy depths, fur prickles uncomfortably at the thought of Red having to work close with Deer, the smiles, she shudders. He was- he was her friend, is this what this was? Was she afraid of being alone?

No. Churro was never alone. She had friends. She had friends...

The tone dips and her grin falters and breaks to pieces, replaced with horrified shock. "You- A life- What?" she blinks in dumbfounded fear. Cats didn't have more than one life- Cat's shouldn't have more than one life but here Blazestar is, defying each and every odd there was. He glosses over it, asking if shes okay and she can't muster up anything to say. The words catch in her throat as she gawks, what was she supposed to say? Eyes turn back to her paws and she finds herself questioning her own mortality, the fragile essence of life, fleeting and for a split second she sees her own hourglass, the sand that slowly falls.

"Was it scary?" she finally speaks, quiet. "Do they not heal everything?" she refers to the Star cats, who she had long believed to be a silly fad. She had entertained the idea, played along with it but she has never seen them. "Don't worry about me, i'm worried about you." she continues following after him, silent after she speaks.

Theres a long sigh. "Do you ever feel like you've made a mistake? Leaving your housefolk, I mean." she thinks back to the Windclan patrol, to Haze's dead body in the middle of the camp, to Red's scream as he saw it. She cringes and a sour look appears on her face. "Sometimes, I feel like it'd be easier to just. Stay with them, you know?" she does not mix Spanish, does not feel comfortable with such a heavy topic- she has tried, tried so hard to be happy. "Sorry-" she cuts herself off.

Unlucky me. "Falling in love. Your girl," she keeps talking, rambling, as if she has never talked about her feelings before and she hasn't. "Was it.. like the fairytales?" she blinks as her paws move. "What does it feel like? How do you know you're in love?" she loves Sopapilla, loves Leche, Concha, is it the same thing? She tries to think of them but she sees Red instead and its that same, bitter, sour feeling which causes her lip to curl.

Shes almost desperate for answers and a pleading face turns to Blazestar. "Por favor, I think i've gone crazy."
​

"speech"​

 

[BLAZESTAR]

Churrodream wears her shock on her face at Blazestar's admission -- that he'd lost a life to a Twoleg monster on the journey. "It was scary," he murmurs, eyes darkening with the memory. The crushing of his ribs, piercing his lung, the breath vanishing almost instantly from his mouth and nose. Darkness washing over him, the blood stench, the pain that had been truly too unbearable for his mortal body.

"Scary, and ... painful," he admits. "But I woke up in StarClan. The cat who gave me that life met me there." He swallows at the memory. The life of love. Had he died doing something he loved? Had love been on his mind when he'd been crushed? "Haku... he died in the battle, before you joined, but... he met me there, and I woke up."

He gives his pelt a brisk shake, as though trying to cast Churrodream's worried gaze away from him. "I'm fine, honestly! I'm better now. They healed the lung and the rib that had pierced it, but I'm still a bit beat up otherwise. I'll be okay soon, though." He smiles at her, hoping it's reassuring. "I want to talk about you."

And there it is, that question that he dreads from every daylight warrior. "Yes. Or... I did," he says slowly. "I missed them every day, even as SkyClan's leader. But after I fell in love with Little Wolf, after she told me about our kits, I realized I had made the right choice." He looks at her pointedly, even raises an eyebrow at her question: "Falling in love. Your girl. Was it like the fairy tales?"

"Maybe in some ways," he says. "The way our meeting felt like fate. The way I remember her that first night, with the starlight in her eyes. But otherwise, it was me feeling worried about her. I'm always worried about her. It was me going crazy, wondering what she's doing, how she's feeling, if she needs something..." He smiles, but it's dim and sad and small. "I wish she and I could be in the same Clan, but I'd never ask her to leave her kin for me, and I know she's loyal to Emberstar now. But StarClan, I worry."

Blazestar flicks an ear, giving Churrodream a measured look. "So, you're in love, then? Don't worry, it makes all of us crazy." He purrs. "Who's the lucky cat?"
​

PENNED BY MARQUETTE​

 

[sheepcurl]

Eyes focus as he begins to speak and she inwardly agrees with his first sentence. Yes... It would be scary to lose a life. Something that shouldn't even happen for cats, having more than one life. It was unnatural and Churro finds herself wondering what she'd do if she was leader. Churrostar. It doesn't fit as much as Blazestar did, his name sounds high and mighty and she secretly wonders how he keeps calm under so much pressure. The next is a slight wince as he explains how this Starclan healed him, how he saw a cat named Haku, a rib that pierced through the lungs, she feels sick just thinking about it. "You go through so much," she starts softly, curled ears pinning back. "I admire you." she nods in affirmation,

Then shes drinking in everything he has to say, he said he did miss them, even when he was leading. Idly she wonders again, would she be able to ever dedicate her life here? Flan, Sopapilla, even her twolegs, she has so much fun with them, but... She frowns. He describes his feelings and inwardly she feels her cheeks heat up, the way I remember her that first night, with the starlight in her eyes. She closes her eyes for a split second, takes a deep breath and theres the same point as there always was, Red.

He asks her who the lucky cat is. Shes immediately bashful, looking away, taking a few quicker steps than normal. "Redstorm-" she blurts out, she does not mean to, but she cuts herself off with a scrunched up muzzle. "I- I mean, I think?" she stammers hopelessly, ears pinning back once more. "The way you described Little Wolf... Is... The same way I feel about him. I've never exactly, have ever felt this way," she laughs quite pathetically, sheepishly, ducking her head in embarrassment. "He makes me feel like I felt back in my old home, happy, at peace. I come to camp with a big smile because I want to see him smile too." she licks her chest fur. Blazestar is a good friend, a good leader, a good listener, she feels comfortable saying this. "I would never, ever tell him though, cause like, what if he stops letting me cuddle with him? Then i'd have to find a new cuddle buddy, and it'd be this whoooooole process-" oh boy, shes rambling again.
​

"speech"​

 

[BLAZESTAR]

╭── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╮​

"You go through so much," Churrodream says, ears pinned back against her head. "I admire you." In response to Blazestar's recounting of losing his life, the dream where he'd met his old friend again. Blazestar smiles bashfully. "I'm not really anyone to admire," he says, flicking an ear dismissively.

He gauges her reaction to his questions with interest, and his eyes widen at her admission. Redstorm, the newly named lead warrior, one of Rain's adopted sons. A prickly but honorable sort, strong and duty-oriented. He thinks them an odd match, but not a bad one. "I don't blame you for being afraid to tell him. I don't know that I would have confessed to Little Wolf at all, had she not told me she loved me first." He exhales, wistful. "But also, now that it's happened, I wouldn't change it for the world. Life is too short, Churrodream. The cats we love will not always be here." He thinks about Haku, Rain, Marigold, Haku, Honeytwist and Beesong being called away to other Clans. "If you think you can find the courage to do it... I would."
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