camp playing on train tracks — open

Gravelpaw does not understand the appeal of kits. Not only does pregnancy seem awful—at least, Sootstar must be miserable like that—but the whole parent thing sounds exhausting. They don’t know how Lynxtooth does it some days, putting up with both themself and their brother’s surely disappointing performances. Constant training, connection, discipline… it sounds horrible.

They avoid the nursery at all costs, only venturing there when absolutely necessary. The noise, the rambunctious energy of the younger cats, is too much for the black-patched apprentice to handle most days. But today, Gravelpaw is tasked with taking prey to the nursery for the queens and kits, and their nerves are already shot before they even reach the nursery. Luckily, the group isn’t inside the den but just outside of it, so they deposit the prey at the paws of the queen and turn to leave. Quick and simple, just the way they like it.

Their back is turned, and they don’t spot the kit who trails after them until there are tiny, thorn-sharp teeth digging into their tail, dragging them a half-step back in surprise. They whirl around to glower at a small kit, who seems to think that the tail of an apprentice is the perfect plaything. "Let go," they protest, shooting a mildly panicked glance in the direction of the kit’s mother. She isn’t looking. "I’m not here to play with you. Leave me alone."

They shove a snowy paw against the kit’s forehead, shoving them back until they detach from Gravelpaw’s tail, not unlike a pesky leech being removed. The queen is still distracted, preoccupied with whatever she thinks is more important than keeping her bitey child from assaulting the poor apprentice. Tears of frustration spring to their eyes, and they shake their head. The kit is batting at their tail again; Gravelpaw tucks it closer to their body, hoping to prevent its usage as a plaything. They suppose they deserve this, as payback for when they were a young kit and their father had to put up with them and Slatepaw being crybabies (but then again, perhaps being a crybaby is a normal reaction from a kit who’d already known the feeling of blood on their pelt by the ripe age of two months old).

Gravelpaw thinks of themself as a patient cat. They can explain and re-explain things, nicely and respectfully, to Slatepaw multiple times. They can duck their head and try again and again until they nail down whatever trick Lynxtooth teaches them. They can pretend that Juniperfrost’s voice doesn’t make them want to claw their ears off. They can let others walk all over them and keep quiet about it. Maybe it isn’t patience at all, but a lack of confidence, like their father says.

Gravelpaw can endure a lot before lashing out, before snapping. But this kit has just about gotten on their last frayed, bleeding nerve.

Finally, Gravelpaw lifts a pristine white paw, claws neatly sheathed, and swats the kit on their small ear. Their eel-black tail lashes—an outward sign of how deeply the monochrome cat’s irritation runs. "Leave me alone," they grit out, a sharp clicking of teeth accompanying their words.

The thought doesn’t even cross their mind, that they’ve just hit a kit right in front of its parent. The queen doesn’t seem to have noticed, anyway; Gravelpaw’s black lip curls into a half-sneer as they stare down the bothersome child. They don’t expect an apology, but there’s some part of them that expects something. Crying, perhaps. Screaming? Maybe a clanmate will scold them for their self-defense—the thought makes them pin their ears flat against their head, and the apprentice glances around to check whether there are any witnesses.
[ DEATH OF A DREAM ]
 
( ) Vulturemask is busy, Flarekit and Dreamkit are asleep, having tired themselves out playing. So Sunflowerkit is left with Snowfeather. She's fine, she's nice enough and she nursed them when they were too little for real food, but there is always a certain sadness to her. Sunflowerkit has been told that she'd lost her previous litter; it makes them feel like a poor replacement. Today, she seems distracted, out of it in a way that she occasionally was. After reprimanding them for trying to sneak out of camp and bringing them back to the nursery, she'd become distant, lost in her own head. She seems tired. Sunflowerkit feels a little bad.

Mostly, though, they feel restless. Sunflowerkit doesn't like being stuck in the nursery, but they don't have much to do at the moment, having bored themself with exploring camp. And well, Snowfeather is always trying to get them to play with the other kits. She wants them to make friends. Maybe they could try it.

When Gravelpaw comes in, they can tell he's nervous. So it might raise the question: why, exactly, is he the target for their little excursion into traditional kittenhood? Well the answer is simple: all the other kits seem to love playing. It always cheers them up. Cheers up adults, too, sometimes. Makes them laugh. So, it's the perfect plan: Sunflowerkit is restless, and Gravelpaw is nervous. A little bit of play-fighting should solve both of their problems.

(In the past, it hasn't just been Sunflowerkit's asocial tendencies preventing them from joining other cats. When they do play, they tend to be far too rough; the kit has a competitive streak, hard as it may be to tell. Every fight becomes something to be won, a way to prove themself. This does not bode well for play. So, they stick to the sidelines, to playing on their own, even if it's in ways the other kits don't get.)

Snowfeather isn't paying much attention, but that's alright. They follow Gravelpaw out of the nursery, trailing after him with a bit of a bounce in their always-quiet step. It's good to get out of the crowded nursery. Once the coast is clear, that's when they pounce. His tail is within reach, so they latch onto it. Teeth and claws sink in.

It doesn't go very well.

Gravelpaw glares at them, pushes them back with a paw. They've messed it up again Still, they won't be deterred. He says he doesn't want to play, but cats don't always mean what they say. Probably, they think, he just doesn't want to play with claws. They've been reprimanded for it before, they remember guiltily. So they try again, paw reached out cautiously, batting at Gravelpaw's tail, claws retracted.

This time, it's worse. A cuff over the ear, a growl to his words. Oh no. Sunflowerkit shrinks back, eyes wide. Their tail is lashing just as hard as Gravelpaw's now. Their mouth parts just so slightly in shock, and after a moment, they cast their eyes downward. They open and close their mouth a few times, trying to work up the courage to speak. It comes out quiet, and more steady than they feel. "Sorry..." Sunflowerkit can't believe how badly they messed that up. They feel awful.
 
──⇌•〘 INFO Most lessons as a kit are hard-learned. Not all children are persistent or endlessly curious, or given to playing tirelessly, but those that are tend to find it's to their detriment. Wolfsong doesn't have children, but he did entertain the kits in the place of his birth— and he was an impish little thing himself. As much as a harsh rebuke could sting, it was a small hurt to spare him much worse later, which is why he does not watch Gravelpaw fend off Sunflowerkit and leap to admonish the apprentice.

Gravelpaw certainly expects it, he thinks amusedly, their careful scrutiny of their surroundings not escaping Wolfsong. He approaches the pair slowly, looking Sunflowerkit over. Their expression is every bit the chastened kit, gaze downcast.

"We must all pick our prey carefully," he tells them lightly, without any rebuke of his own. "Some tails are attached to grumpy badgers." Glancing at the nearby apprentice, he smiles smoothly. "I do know of a tail you might like, though: long as a snake and soft as a chick's downy feathers. Want to hunt it with me?"

/@SUNSTRIDE
 
( ) Sunflowerkit tenses up a bit as Wolfsong approaches, expecting more admonishment. Instead, though, his voice is light and unbothered, even he cautions them against their choice of playmate. "We must all pick our prey carefully", he says, and it's not the reprimand they're expecting. Still, though, it does little to soothe them. Their eyes remain downcast, though they incline their head a bit toward Wolfsong to show that they're listening.

It's not until he speaks again that they finally look up, tension easing from their body a fraction. His words intrigue them; they do love soft things... And they still want something fun to do! The nursery is so boring! "Want to hunt it with me?" he asks, and they give a little hum of affirmation, nodding eagerly, Gravelpaw all but forgotten in the face of this new challenge.
 
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A grunt echoes past fanged jaws as Tigerfrost strides past, tail flicking through the chilled air and shoulders rolling with a casual shrug. He pauses briefly, flaming eyes observing the kitten's attempt to play, and the apprentice's growing agitation. The huff that falls from the Warrior's tongue is quiet, a small noise of satisfaction.

"Kit-play builds the skills they'll need to become strong warriors. Strength, speed, reflex." He advises, fiery eyes flickering across Gravelpaw. It is not a rebuke. The apprentice had a right to their own space, of course. Every cat did. But the explanation is there regardless. Kittens should be encouraged to play, though preferably with those who didn't mind it. He jerks his chin toward Wolfsong with a blink of approval, then his gaze shifts back down to Sunflowerkit.

"Take the opportunity to play as much as you'd like while you are young, but Wolfsong is right. It is more enjoyable to play with those who wish to play back, anyways." He remembered his days as a kit, so many long moons ago. As grumpy and serious as Tigerfrost might be now, he was surely an energetic little devil of a child. And like Sunflowerkit, he too was made to learn many necessary lessons.
 
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Firepaw hates the nursery, it's a place she doesn't like being around but kits themselves she can't say yeah she find them annoying a good portion of the time but really she finds it a little hard to fault them on their behavior and well they were just nothing like her; nothing like how she'd been at their age. She and her brothers weren't ever truly allowed to be annoying little scabs who needed a good picking on. No Ravencry kept them in line if not with her stern voice but with the fear of disappointment and sadly once little now far to big Firepaw knew all about that. She's thankful for the way she was raised, she wasn't soft because of it she was loyal to the core and so were her brothers. But as she watches them play she can't bite back the onslaught of this indescribable sadness she feels at her core. It's easily masked, she's distracted by the sight of Gravelpaw struggling to move forward a kit latched onto his tail like a overgrown tick and she can't help herself but stand and watch at the sight of her peers 'suffering'. Sure it'd be more amusing if it was someone like Elkskull or Snailpaw dealing with such a bother but regardless there's humor to be found in watching Gravelpaw struggle unsure of how to deal with the problem. She's almost about to pad over and go save them before they muster up the courage their brother rarely had to do something about it. It's not something she sees from them often as well, she wonders why that is with a father as grumpy as Lynxtooth despite what the gruff tom did they just didn't inherent his spirit nor temper. From what she's seen anyway, they veered on the more patient end of the apprentices but everyone had their trigger and Sunflowerkit had pulled it. She hated being cuffed or reprimanded now, it's a surprise the young kit doesn't start to bawl at being batted at.

It was only a matter of time, most warriors would've pushed the kit away eventually if not far sooner then they did but she knows the feeling well even if she wasn't a kit anymore so often did she receive punishment for pushing her luck. Sure the circumstances were different but she could empathize and also the last thing she wanted to hear throughout the camp is the crying of a kit. But maybe it's not just Sunflowerkit that bring worry to her but the strange look she sees written over Gravelpaw's features; that uncertainty as to what was to come unsure if a lecture or worse would given to him for his actions. Tigerfrost's words aren't that thankfully, as much as she'd find seeing some of the apprentices get scolded she doesn't really think he should wasn't like the kit was crying now anyway easily distracted as he was by whatever game Wolfsong was leading him into.

She steps close to Gravelpaw head tilting slightly ❝You good?❞ she asks and there's no twinge of anything ingenuine to her tone ❝Don't think I've seen you get pissed before❞ she states with a shrug, sure Sunflowerkit was being annoying but had that really been solely all it took to get him to snap? She certainly never heard him snap like that on her and she has pushed like she does for all the apprentices, she's gotten Slatepaw too however she can still recall the way he spoke to her after she'd mocked the Riverclanner with a dead mom almost a moon ago.

( PLACE ME IN MY CASKET TONIGHT ; BECAUSE IM ALREADY DYING INSIDE )
 
DONT EVER WANT TO SEE THINGS CHANGE
periwinklepaw | 06 months | demi-boy | he/they | physically easy (pacifist) | mentally easy | attack in bold #ccccff
Periwinkle doesn't understand how anyone could not like kits. It's as strange to him as the thought of being in another clan. They're small and innocent and adorable - they're all the things he wishes he could still be, wrapped up in a tiny adorable bundle. It probably doesn't help that half the kits in the clan are vulture's siblings, the tiny little balls of fur his friend had brought back from who knows where. So far, peri has only babysat the one of them - dreamkit - but the need to to impose his presence on the rest persists. The quiet boy hovers nearby like a shadow, watching and worrying, and when gravelpaw smacks sunflowerkit is sets him on edge.

Striding over on near-silent paws, the long and lanky boy realizes for a surprised moment he's taller than the older tom, before his loose posture has his shoulders corrects the height difference. He must've had another growth spurt - he notes absently, before pushing away the intrusive thought. "Y-y-you sh-ould be m-more polite," he says quietly, scolding his fellow apprentice, though there is a bite to his words that he usually lacks. It seems to be there more often than not these days, and if he went so tired and stressed and anxious all the time he might be more worried about the sudden change in his disposition - but instead, he's just irritated.

Wolfsong is also quick to come to Sunflowerkits rescue, the older tom easily distracting her, and he feels his fur lie flat once more as he settles. He wishes he was like that - easy confidence, knowing just the right thing to say. Instead his head is always a jumbled mess, reflected back in his own horrid speech. Tigerfrost and firepaw are quick to join them, and though he watches the older warrior warily he decides to set aside his distrust to focus on the child in front of them. "Th-that was a r-really g-g-g-good p-poun-ce though, sh-sh-shame he was so g-g-g-grumpy," he tells the child, a bright smile on his soft features.

 
Sunflowerkit’s apology means little to him—if they meant it, then the kit would have stopped the first time they’d been asked—but Gravelpaw offers a shrug anyway. The child seems genuinely abashed, and for that the apprentice very nearly forgives them, but they’re easily persuaded by Wolfsong’s invitation to play with the warrior instead. Gravelpaw rolls their eyes, then their shoulders. Tries to loosen up, because this interaction has set their back all tense and they can tell it will hurt later.

The golden warrior calls them grumpy—and that’s not true, is it? Their father is grumpy, Juniperfrost is grumpy. Does this mean they’re just like those two? Maybe it is true. Maybe they’re becoming just like their father; that isn’t a bad thing, necessarily, but it’s quite the revelation to Gravelpaw. He has never thought of himself as the grouchy type, but perhaps that’s just what happens when others don’t respect his wishes. He shoots a glance at Wolfsong, an acknowledgement and a thanks in one look.

While Wolfsong doesn’t bother scolding them, Tigerfrost offers a similar-but-different response. Gravelpaw is grateful for it, but still flattens their ears at the older tom’s words. It is true that kits need to play to build their motor skills, but that doesn’t mean they should play with those who don’t want to play. "Kits can play with someone else." It isn’t disrespectful, but their tone is flat as their ears. They wish they were somewhere else, anywhere else, especially when they spot Firepaw also approaching the scene.

To their surprise, the other apprentice doesn’t have anything negative to say, either. In fact, she seems to genuinely care whether he’s okay, and Gravelpaw blinks at her slowly. Of course she’s never seen him pissed before; Gravelpaw doesn’t get angry. They get the feeling that they’re supposed to get mad sometimes, like when they’d been at the SkyClan border, but they’d only felt something like ice in their teeth, pricking at their gums. "I’m not pissed. Just annoyed." they finally say, tail flicking from side to side. It takes another moment, and they take a deep breath, mustering a quiet, genuine, "Thank you."

The next cat to join the group is the one who most clearly scolds him, and Gravelpaw bristles back up immediately, because it’s Periwinklepaw. The almost-smile they’d offered Firepaw is gone, replaced by a curl of their lip and a sharp once-over of the taller apprentice. For a moment they only level Periwinklepaw with glare that could wither flowers, but they’ve been poked and prodded at enough today. Would Lynxtooth take this lying down? No. So they won’t, either. They’ve been lectured on their lack of confidence enough as is, they won’t have him see them crumble to the slightest pressure from an apprentice. "And you should mind your own," they snap, a scowl settling on their muzzle. Who’s he, to tell them to be more polite?

Gravelpaw wants to leave. They want to leave the stupid nursery and go back to their more relaxing tasks, like hunting and patrolling and doing literally anything except for this. All this stress can’t be good for them, either—this just solidifies their dislike for kits.
[ DEATH OF A DREAM ]
 
──⇌•〘 INFO He smiles at the kit's silent agreement, and though his gaze is reserved for the little one, he is not unaware to the conversations around them. Tigerfrost does not scold the apprentice, siding with Wolfsong's approach, for which he is grateful. He knows if Gravelpaw were deemed an exile, the warrior wouldn't hesitate to chase them down— but as long as they are a WindClanner, he offers his support.

What would force her most loyal followers to hesitate? It is a question for another time.

"He is very tall, the owner of this tail. Much taller than I am," he explains, glancing at Firepaw, curious as she often is. Periwinklepaw, however, doesn't trace Tigerfrost and Wolfsong's path; he chastises Gravelpaw, and it doesn't escape his notice that their expression shutters. They snap at the other apprentice, who's now come to speak with the child. Wolfsong says nothing of the misstep; there have been enough scoldings for today. "And red, red as the sun when it rests its head on a horizon free of clouds. He will see us coming if we aren't careful. Show me your sneaking stance— yours must be better than mine."

Wolfsong straightens from his crouch to stare over at Gravelpaw. "Sunstride knows a quiet place of solitude. He could tell you of it, if you'd like, and as it happens, he is our current quarry."
 
( ) As more cats approach, Sunflowerkit attempts to tune out the ones who are focusing on Gravelpaw. That's done, now. They messed up, but they're trying very hard to bury the guilty feeling; it's much easier with something new to focus on, courtesy of Wolfsong. Still though, a few of the new cats are talking to them, so their attention is briefly divided. The tabby-and-white tom doesn't scold them either, nearly defending them. It's strange, how little trouble they're getting in. They incline their head in acknowledgement at Tigerfrost's advice, but their mind is still elsewhere.

Periwinklepaw is more interesting; they heard Dreamkit talk about him, and they know he spends time with Vulturemask. They're wary about the apprentice, unsure of his intentions. Still, though, he's someone to pay attention to. He scolds Gravelpaw which is strange. Isn't Gravelpaw older? Can he do that?

Still, when Periwinklepaw compliments their pounce, the kit preens, puffing out their chest, the barest hint of a smile twitching across their face. It was a good pounce, they're glad someone can appreciate it.

When Wolfsong speaks again, Sunflowerkit's attention is fully on him. They like the way he speaks, like the way he describes the cat they're hunting. It makes it feel more adventurous, like they're on some great quest. And a sneaking stance--they can certainly do that! Sunflowerkit is great at sneaking, they often do it by accident with how soft their paws are.

The kit crouches down--it's not anything resembling a proper stance, just an imitation of what they've seen before. A crouch and nothing more, muscles tensed too tightly to be sustainable. Still, though, when they stalk towards Wolfsong, it is slow and deliberate, moving at a snail's pace, paws landing carefully and silently.

They straighten up when the tom addresses Gravelpaw. The spell is broken, and they feel a touch of disappointment. He's going to be coming? They were hoping they could just ignore the apprentice after their disastrous attack.
 
She nods at Gravelpaw though she doesn't look entirely convinced, even annoyed was something new for them part of her wished he was like that more ferocity was always admirable, they needed to stick up for themselves more though not quite as much as their brother needed to but regardless. She's about to open her maw when another apprentices voice cuts in one she lets out a audible groan at. Periwinklepaw's fumbling voice has always bothered her, it's grating and she wonders if his stutter would always be a permeant fixture or if he'd find the confidence to speak right. It's laughable the way he tells off Gravelpaw as if he had any power to enforce his words, she turns her head to glare at him fiery gaze looking him up and down in disgust. He had some nerve, Starclan all the apprentices had been acting weird some not knowing their place and others acting out and getting on her nerves more then usual, it's normal though they were all growing up after all and the stress of clan life was getting to them; even she wasn't so infallible she was changing as well. Putting herself out there, looking after her peers something she may have always done to some extent but with her new 'duty' of keeping an eye on them to make sure they weren't becoming traitors she was doing much more perhaps more then she realized.

Gravelpaw tells him off but she wouldn't keep her maw shut she joins in with a far more insulting ❝Yeah! Fuh-fuh-fuck off Periwinklepaw!❞ she'd puncuate it by sticking her tongue out at him hoping to catch his gaze before he turned his attention to Sunflowerkit and all the playmates the kit had now found for themselves. She turns back to the bicolor-apprentice gesturing with her head before meowing once more ❝C'mon lets go do somethin' else, I'm not in the mood to be a kit chew toy either, lets go hunt or somethin❞ she'd suggest casting one last look to the nursery, with one kit out she expects the rest of the litter to come bounding out to join in the commotion. She hopes to be elusive by then. ​

( PLACE ME IN MY CASKET TONIGHT ; BECAUSE IM ALREADY DYING INSIDE )