there were nights full of nightmares - banishment

"AND THOUGH THE EMBERS ARE NEW, WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T LET THE FIRE DIE"
Emberstar had made her decision. It had been a long walk back from the border, and all the while she had worked to douse the flames of her anger. She hated being angry. It consumed her, ate at everything that she liked about herself and left behind a terrible, mean creature. Her anger felt like losing control. It made her feel useless and helpless, and those were the two feeling she had always hated most.

They were feelings she couldn't escape now though. It felt like this was inevitable, like from the moment she accepted Cinderfrost into her clan this would always have been the result. Had she made a mistake in doing so?

Then again, if Emberstar had made a mistake in letting her stay, that meant that the stars had too. That was something she refused to believe. Then, perhaps, she had simply failed to live up to their expectations. If she had worked harder, done better, then maybe none of this would have happened. Or, another possibility, maybe it hadn't been a mistake at all. Cinderfrost had done some good in her time in the clan. She had saved Roepaw, helped Sunfreckle and Rabbitnose deliver their kits, and helped everyone during the fire. Even saved Emberstar's own life. She wanted to believe all that had been foreseen by Starclan.

Emberstar hoped that her friends in the sky would understand the decision she had to make now.

The leader leapt atop highrock, and looked down at her clan assembled below. "Thunderclan." She croaked out exhaustively, it had been a long day. "From this moment onward, Cinderfrost will no longer serve as the medicine cat of our clan, and will be banished." It was strange, to use that word. She had never thought she would. They were supposed to all be family."Her crimes are taking my first life, threatening Finchcatcher when he came to join our ranks, and attacking Bonejaw, the medicine cat of Shadowclan. I have tried," Remorse was heavy in her tone. She had tried, she had tried to hard. This felt like giving up. "To have faith in the stars choice, and work with her to keep her worse tenancies under control. Now, however, her violence has gone beyond our borders, to places where I have no authority. She has proven herself a threat to the other clans, and to the peace. In light of that, I can no longer harbor her in our camp in good conscience."

Her eyes found Berryheart. "Thankfully, our clan will not be left without a medicine cat. Berryheart has my full faith, as it was dreams sent to me by Starclan that led to his appointment." She dipped her head toward him.

Emberstar looked to the rest of her clan, waiting for their reaction. Idly, she wondered if they would boo or cheer her announcement. She also wondered which one she was hoping for.
 

Silence had been all Berryheart could offer upon their return, his head bowed low. He was not fond of being wordy generally, and in this circumstance was there even a single word of comfort he could offer? Sparky looked... defeated. The light in her demeanour, that fire-flicker warmth that he believed he had named her for, was snuffed and left a smoking splint, only embers and ash remaining. Sad, that it had come to this- there were two shadows that hung over her today. The Clan by name, and the overcasting presence of her decision.

He took rank as usual among the warriors, racing thoughts unable to register he was now separate from them by demand of the night spirits. Had they seen this coming? Why hadn't they given warning? He did not think why him, for he failed to realise that it was him who would carry on the Executioner's role, only aware of the immediate reality alongside the tsunami of questions ravaging his mind. It was spoken- she was banished, never to return. How could this have happened? A star-appointed cat, someone pitiable, failing continuously to hold herself back from needless violence? A waste of Sparky's first life, a new warrior near-extinguished, a colleague torn asunder. It was sad, terrible, that she could not help herself. How preventable.

Dappled features wore a rare expression of readable shock as Sparky's words soon turned to him, her head dipped in his direction. His brain made quick work to catch up- medicine cat, Berryheart, dreams, StarClan. Sent to... her? Had it not been the Executioner who had been instructed that he was to be her student, but the leader herself? Surely, surely the Stars had seen it coming... so why had they spared them of preparation? Why had they revoked him his opportunity to learn?

For now- now, he was no longer a student as he had been prepared to become all day. No, now the role of medicine cat, holy and Star-blessed, was his- and for what sense? He knew honey gathering, knew poison- but he was not qualified. Berryheart had never once committed to anything without being entirely prepared for it- but now he was in the water, legs kicking frantically as he thrashed to shore. Learning as he went... it was not tutoring, but...

"Um- yes." A quiet mumble, unprepared, came flooding from a knocked-aside jaw before he could help to stop it. Stupid, slacking mind- not bothering to wait. But what else could he say, to appease them? Likely nothing... in this stupour, could he fully deserve her full faith?
[ PENNED BY PIN ]
 

The walk back to camp feels like the longest journey in the world. Flycatcher keeps his head down most of the journey, though periodically looks around to ensure Roepaw is still following and hasn't gone racing back to give ShadowClan more of her mind.

When they finally make it back to camp, Emberstar is quick to take her place on the highrock and makes it official to the clan that Cinderfrost has been banished and that Berryheart would be the new official medicine cat. Flycatcher briefly looks over to the tortoiseshell tom and his eyes widen in surprise. Berryheart was the medicine cat? That was very sudden to be sure and the blue tabby finds himself glancing over at the tortoiseshell tom, wondering how he must be feeling about all this.
 
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☀ - WHILST MY HEART STILL BEATS
Sunnyday stood there with his ears pricked as he heeded the call made to the clan by Emberstar. He hadn't been present for things going down at the border but the outcome that had spilled forth chilled him to the core. The tom listened to what was being said, but the reality of it all proved to be hefty and he was on the cusp of buckling then and there. His body shook and the usual glow of life in his eyes faded away into pits of dulled blue.

He had never been ignorant of Cinderfrost's history, but he had tried to avoid letting it blight his thoughts of her. Not when he had seen a good person deep within. She had been a fine medicine cat and he had honestly trusted her through and through. He gritted his teeth and found himself backing up, no longer able to bring himself to remain there within the crowd. Yes, he wished to offer his support and congratulations to Berryheart, a worthy successor, but the pain within his heart was simply too much to bear. He longed to be left alone, at least for a little while. And with that the tom headed out on a solitary patrol.​

 

Rabbitnose was bitter. Very bitter. The usually kind smiling tom was not smiling as Emberstar made her announcement.

Sure, Cinderfrost had done some bad things. He couldn't deny that. Perhaps he would feel differently if he were there. But he wasn't. He didn't hate Cinderfrost.

He owed her his life, for stars sake. Sure it was because he was stupid. But she still saved him.

"I am grateful for Cinderfrost's service to the clan. She helped me, my kits, did her best for Dovekit, and for that I am eternally grateful." He said. " I understand why the decision is being made, but I think it unwise to do it so close to Leaf bare.

He looked to Berryheart. "Not that I doubt your abilities! I think you'll make a wonderful medicine cat!" He would quickly add. "I just think having two medicine cats available would make it a little easier on us."

"And I hate that Pitchstar is getting what he wants. Who does he think he is."

He stopped himself. He was prattling on again, time to reel it in. He takes a breath and let's it out, telling himself if Shadowclan crossed their border again, he would send them back bleeding.
 

Imagine his surprise when the patrols that had gone out all converged back into the clan at the same time and Emberstar immediately moved to the highrock. Sunfreckle could not help but stare with wide, concerned eyes as the leader began to speak and instantly he is looking for Rabbitnose in the crowd who he knew had been out on one of said patrols. What in stars had happened?! Bit by bit the puzzle began to put itself back together.
He had not been present for the incident with Finchcatcher, had no idea it even occurred but you would have to be deaf to not know about how the healer took one of Emberstar's lives. He himself had been wary, uncertain at first, but if even Emberstar had been willing to forgive and try to move forward who was he to question her judgement? The red tabby wasn't the best judge of character himself really, with few exceptions, so he happily agreed with the leader to just let it go. Cinderfrost had helped him when he needed it, helped his kits, even saved his mate's dumbass when he went to shove berries he didn't know in his mouth. All of that had helped balance it out in his mind, he'd been...hopeful even...that the clan and the ashen healer could move forward together. But attacking another medicine cat? What was going through her head? Why?
He'd never know now, he supposed that should bother him more but he only felt a tired exhaustion. Berryheart was their medicine cat now and he wanted to be encouraging so he moved to walk over and lean into Rabbitnose, tail flicking up to shush his protests-it seemed the border incident had been tense.
"Shh, dear...let's not pick fights with the other clans...we're better than that." Even if they supposedly deserved it, it wasn't often he saw his mate so heated.
"Berryheart, you'll do well...if you ever want blue flowers for your den...you know who to ask~"
It was meant as a lighthearted attempt to soften the tone but, he could already feel the unease in the camp.

 
Howling Wind strides swiftly into camp, keeping Sloepaw at her shoulder. The air is noticeable tense and she hates it, evident in the way her tail lashes behind her. "Go to your denmates," She instructs her apprentice softly, her gaze flicking to the dark-pelted tom before she makes a beeline for Highrock. Emberstar is already atop her perch, calling for the clan to gather in an emergency meeting. Most of the clan has no idea what has transpired, and their wide eyes stare up at their leader wit curiosity and confusion. The deputy sits in her designated spot, expression taut.

Just like that, the news is out. Immediately, emerald gaze lifts to read the reactions of her clanmates. Who would be as relieved as she is? Who would take the side of their leader, and who would take the side of her murderer? Flycatcher had been loyal at the border, speaking out against the medicine cat's crimes. She looks to him to read his expression before her sights latch onto Sunnyday, who leaves. Interesting. Rabbitnose then speaks out, calling the decision unwise, and the tabby wastes no time in lifting her chin, eyes narrowed upon the younger tom as she evenly states, "I believe it is far more unwise to harbor a threat within our camp so close to Leaf-bare. ThunderClan cannot get tangled in a conflict caused by a medicine cat's selfish desire for revenge. Not to mention she is and has been our leader's murderer ever since coming here. Emberstar is making the safest possible decision for our clan." Perhaps the love of a father is enough to blind him, to get him to look past her heinous crimes because she had been around to help his kits. Even still, she fails to imagine herself being okay with a killer around her own children. She hasn't warned them away from her, in actuality. Sunfreckle approaches his mate, and Howling Wind almost expects him to back him up, but instead he is the voice of reason, gently calming him down. A look of respect crosses her features as she eyes the queen, caught off guard by his stance but appreciative nonetheless. She blinks towards him once.

Emberstar's next words catch her even more off guard. Berryheart. Berryheart? Did she hear that right? Howling Wind looks up at her leader in surprise, green eyes wide. She received a dream from StarClan telling her that her son was to be ThunderClan's next medicine cat? Shocked gaze tears away from her and lands on the tortoiseshell as she mumbles his response. Speechless, she hardly knows how to respond! StarClan hasn't left them without a healer. Her very own child would be their savior.
 
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I TOLD YOU ONCE, I CAN'T DO THIS AGAIN

She had stormed into camp, aware of Flycatchers side-glances, each one igniting sparks until she broke ahead, rushing into camp. She needed to get away.
There was no where to go, however. Robinpaw and her band lounged in front of the apprentices den, leaving camp was certainly not an option.
Her gaze glides towards the medicine den, but something that used to hold comfort now seemed to loom over her.
She had finally resigned to the outskirts of camp by the time Emberstar and Cinderfrost arrive back, and by the solemn look on the flame leaders face, Roepaw knew what was coming.
Her features remained stone-cold now, despite the lower lip that subtly trembled. Cinderfrost had just accepted her banishment, for what? The fantasy that Roepaw and everyone else would be better off? It was madness, she was being abandoned all over again.
Cinnamon ears flattened themselves when Emberstar speaks. Berryheart is to be the next medicine cat, and Roepaw cannot help the bitterness that grabs ahold of her.
Curling into herself, she turns her back towards the rest of the clan, fury and shame burning at her cheekbones.
"speech."

 
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The stillness of the afternoon is broken. Emberstar storms into the camp, ThunderClanners flooding in behind her. Cinderfrost, flanked by warriors. Graystorm tilts his head back with a snort, brows pinching together. The flame point looks anything but her typical, cheery self. Something has happened, and Graystorm seethes to think that he's missing important puzzle pieces.

"Mom! What's goin' on-" Graystorm begins to stride over to his mother, but before he could reach her, Emberstar leaps atop the Highrock. He doesn't need to question Howling Wind further.

From this moment onward, Cinderfrost will no longer serve as the medicine cat of our clan, and will be banished.

Oh. Oh. A peal of laughter bubbles past torn lips. "About damn time!" Graystorm crows, tossing a sneer towards the forsaken medicine cat. "She's been a danger from the moment she stepped foot in this forest!" He's beyond ecstatic that the she-devil is finally getting what she deserved; there is no room for dangerous cats such as Cinderfrost within ThunderClan's borders. However, a new concern rises to the surface... Who will be Cinderfrost's successor?

Of all the possible options, Graystorm is most surprised by Emberstar's decision. Berryheart, his own brother, chosen by the stars themselves. While Graystorm has no interest in pursuing a medicinal path in life, there is... jealousy, perhaps, in knowing that StarClan favors his littermate over him. His mother as deputy, and his brother as medicine cat... The weight of legacies are heavy upon his ashen shoulders. Would his be as grand as theirs?

Graystorm inclines his head towards Berryheart, who seems to be caught in quite a stupor at the announcement. An amused smirk plays at the warrior's lips at the readable shock upon the typically aloof tom's face. With a chuckle, Graystorm throws himself through the crowd until he could attempt to wrap one paw around Berryheart's neck, grinning at the tortoiseshell. Perhaps it is an inappropriate moment to do so, given the circumstances, but Graystorm feels as though this is a moment to celebrate. Like flowers blooming from decay, Berryheart would mend what Cinderfrost has broken. "Hell yeah! Dude, you're gonna be a kick-ass medicine cat!"
 
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To say that Little Wolf is sad to see Cinderfrost go was an understatement. The gray she cat was the reason why Little Wolf did not feel safe in her own nest, the reason for countless nights of lost sleep. She knew the troubled medicine cat and her mother did not see eye to eye, what if she came after her, one of her kits, one of her siblings, as a way of getting revenge against the clans deputy? She is glad Emberstar is finally casting her off, though she agrees it could not come soon enough.

Her green eyes find Rabbitnose as he speaks his displeasure, a frown tugging at her lips, did he not see the danger the gray furred she cat was? How much trouble she would be if they kept her around? Time and time again she was granted another chance and constantly she would prove that she was not worthy of them. Little Wolf would’ve cast her out after she had taken Emberstars first life. She was a cat prone to violence and spewing nonsense. That would never change.

Her green eyes find her speckled brother in the crowd. Chosen by the stars. She couldn’t be happier. A purr erupts from her fire damaged throat, crackled and broken but a happy sound all the same. She comes to stand next to him, bumping into his shoulder affectionately. "Youre going to do amazing, I just know it" she says softly in way of congratulations. She’s glad that there is someone who she can trust in the position now and she’s certain her brother will learn fast. He had always been smart and a quick learner, when he applied himself that is.

 
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i . information : entrance like fog, shadowy over the dew - studded grass. cobwebtail emerges from where he’d been lurking just beneath a thicket of briar, paddin up alongside his sister, scent of milk carrying heavy on her dark fur. cinderfrost — banished at last. the man releases a heavy, derisive sigh before sniffing heavily in the silver molly’s direction. emberstar’s tone carries sorrow, nervousness . . rabbitnose is quick to solidify her anxieties, stepping up to defend their clan’s local murderess. a coward who attacks when ones back is turned, unprompted, unremorseful. he would think it funny, should it have been any other clan burdened with her wholly undeserved, star - given role. she was an affront, she deserved to be banished to whatever place was desolate enough to quell the violence that so obviously itched at her paws. exiled to the furthest lands beyond carrionplace, with the rot and biting rats.

she would starve within three moons, he wagered.

oh, what a shame. and so close to leafbare . . “ a barely contained purr, a trill, phantom of a smile passing over his blushed maw. cobweb inclines his head, partially to further conceal his poorly tampered amusement. gleaming eyes finally find his brother, mottled pelt alight in the crowd. his clanmates begin to voice their approval, and the pale tabby wastes no time, “ of course he will. “ the man speaks in turn, giving his sister a warm, albeit brief look, “ it’s a welcome change, you’ll do wonderfully.

  • COBWEBTAIL ; he/him. twenty seven months old. howling wind x gray wolf.
    − tall, handsome lh pale blue tabby w low white & dusty blue eyes.
    − bisexual, biromantic ; open for brief romances and flings, penned by antlers.
  • unknown.png

 
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Standing beside her father, the child would glance up at him with concern at the words of her clanmates. Unable to understand what was happening, Dewkit would glance between Emberstar and her clanmates, hoping that someone would explain what was happening. “Why does Cinderheart have to go away?! We need her!” Tears would stream down her face as she absorbed the mixed reactions of her clanmates, looking at the shocked face of their former medicinecat. Cinderheart couldn't leave her! They couldn't really take her friend away could they?

// i have loved cinderheart while i've been in thunderclan!! thank you for making me feel welcomed and i will truly miss her!!


 
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Whiskercloud tries to see the good in everyone. To them, there is no such thing as good cats and bad cats. Everyone does bad things, sometimes. And everyone deserves a second chance, because everyone is capable of change if given the opportunity to do so.

They've seen the good in Cinderfrost. She cares for Roepaw like a mother does her child. She's saved lives, even the one of the leader she'd killed. Whiskercloud knows, with certainty, that Cinderfrost is trying to change. So, why couldn't their clanmates see that?

Lips purse into a thin line, their tufted tail lashing. Nerves wracked and eyes dart between Emberstar and Cinderfrost, their gut coiling into a tight knot as the medicine cat is sentenced to exile. And the polite feline does something they'd never expected themselves to do; they speak up. "Wait!" They swallow hard, paws fidgeting. "You- do you know the full story? Have you, uh, even asked Cinderfrost why-? Because, there has to be a reason she attacked, uh... Them. Cinderfrost, she's not, she's not evil!" They glance down, away from the eyes burning their skin.There has to be a reason. There's always a reason. It's unfair to punish Cinderfrost without even asking her for her side of the story! "She's just, a cat. A cat who's made mistakes, sure, but..." Whiskercloud sighs, ears flat. They've never been good at this, public speaking, thing. Especially with such high stakes. "She has good in her! I, I've seen it!"

Whiskercloud looks back up at Emberstar, focusing on anywhere but the leader's eyes. "Please, Emberstar, reconsider."
 

SO YOUNG, YET SO BROKEN

Steel blue optics would watch the entire scene unfold around him, thin tail tapping the ground behind him as he absorbed the announcement. Cinderfrost had made her final mistake, and to attack a fellow medicine cat at that. A scoff would blow past his maw as many voices rose up to defend the sorry excuse of a healer and Leafshade felt the fur along his shoulders bristle in further irritation.

These cats were surely mouse-brained to be won over by a cat as manipulative as Cinderfrost. He would listen as Howling Wind and a few others actually talked some sense and he would look up to Emberstar with an unreadable expression. He wanted to laugh just as Graystorm and Cobwebtail had, because of course he was more than pleased to have that intolerable molly out of Thunderclan once and for all. And yet, looking up at her leader's face, he couldn't make the glee he wanted to feel come.

A growl of frustration would leave him, barely audible above the cries of both support and protest of her decision. How was he supposed to revel at this moment when she looked so damn sad about it!? His tail would lash once more, but he finally made a decision about what to do. Rising to his paws and making his way over to his friend, Leafshade would aim to lightly touch his nose to Berryhearts' shoulder and meow in a voice that was less arrogant than usual, "Finally those stupid stars make a good decision. You'll do great." He would take a seat beside their new medicine cat then, glaring at all those who breathed a word of support for that murdering molly and showing his otherwise silent support of their leader's ruling.


Perhaps now Thunderclan could live in actual peace.
 
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She's gone.

Cinderfrost is gone, and Finchcatcher is free.

Free from the blue smoke's gaze. Free from having to watch every step he took. Free from the inkling of fear that lingers at all times. He is free to be a real ThunderClanner, now - free to do what he came here to do: heal.

Though he was there when Pitchstar demanded for her exile, it all just seemed too good to be true. Part of him hadn't expected it to happen, had expected Emberstar to just, let her stay - she'd done so before, hadn't she? - and for Cinderfrost's gaze to be forever locked on him, deadly claws ready to strike.

And yet, at the same time...

And yet at the same time, worry lays heavy over his freedom. Leaf-bare was coming. Leaf-bare was coming, and Cinderfrost wouldn't be here to heal those who were bound to fall ill. Berryheart would, Finchcatcher reminded himself, and though he much preferred Berryheart over Cinderfrost... did he learn enough, in his short time as the healer's apprentice?

Nonsense. This wasn't a time for worry.

"Well, I for one, am glad Cinderfrost is gone," he says amidst the ThunderClanners and their divided thoughts on the matter, despite his certainty that those around him would be aware of his opinions on the former medicine cat, of what had happened the day he arrived in their territory. He turns to look at Berryheart, dips his head at him.

"You will do great, I'm sure of it."
 

Cinderfrost, gone? Exiled?

Well, it's about time, isn't it?

A witness to the murder of Emberstar, Kindleheart had seen the former healer's violence with his own olive eyes. He'd questioned her acceptance into the clan from the start, questioned it every time he'd laid eyes on the blue molly. Emberstar never should have brought her into the clan, should've just... asked the stars for a new medicine cat from the start. As Emberstar says, Berryheart was also chosen by the stars. They should have chosen him first, or... maybe, taken less time to choose him. So close to leaf-bare, too - a right shame.

As he hears protests around him, he is reminded that - despite her violence - Cinderfrost had made her mark on the clan. Healed those around him, made friends, taken in little Roepaw. She was just as much a part of this clan as Kindleheart was, now torn from those who care about her. He feels bad for those who cared for her.

What a difficult situation ThunderClan had landed themselves in.

The brown and white tabby looks around at the crowd around him, before eyes finally land on their new medicine cat. "Congratulations, Berryheart," he tells him, sincerity in his voice, though uncertainty settles over him. Hopefully, Berryheart knows enough to help ThunderClan survive leaf-bare.
 
A family-man herself, of course, of course, she can only agree with her family. Her grin is wide when the announcement is made. Her tail sets loose in a disorienting lashes, like a dog wagging it's tail. "Woah!" Wolfpaw chirps in surprise. She nearly says 'rare good decision from Emberstar,' but maybe that wasn't fair. She did promote Howling Wind. Yeah... Yeah! Maybe she was coming around, the deputy was helping her see things. Good! She'd nod fiercely in agreement with the lady herself. Wahhh we need her! For what? DYING?????? "About! Damn! Time!" she repeats in a mimickry of her uncles voice, shifting her weight side to side as she sits behind him.

All these whiners, yeesh. "Pssh, the whole story? She probably tried to gut her unprovoked just like she did to Emberstar!" she hisses. What did good in you matter if the whole clan has already seen that you don't even need a reason for you to go on a killin' spree? You can't just get that trust back in what, a few moons? As if! And the streak of Emberstar's good decisions keeps on going! Berrynose, her replacement??? Wolfpaw lets out a loud whoop of approval. Leafshade was spitting right now!! "BERRYYHHEARRRRT!!!"