private where's your bitter girl | edenberry

[Cherryblossom]

Rain gently drums on the overhanging ferms, whose broad fronds the pair find themselves curled beneath. Dandelion wine eyes slowly trace the path of each droplet as it runs down the spine of the fern and into the earth, marching straight to soundless impact into the sweet, dark loam. Nightfall means camp is full, their low chatter enough to replace the cicadas drowning in the weather.

A pale paw softly traces Edenberry's black-dotted brow, just above the strip of muted pink surrounding their eye, an emerald carefully nestled into a cushion of dusted rose. The tender fabric of their face is both healed and still lingering, as though the soul of Tawnystripe and whatever else happened that day still lingers in the ripples of flesh. Cherryblossom would say she has no qualms looking into the mismatched eyes of her lover—Orangestar and Slate were staples of her kithood—but she keeps her gaze trained on the rest of the hollow as they share tongues.

"When do you have to go back?" the deputy murmurs. To your nest. Edenberry's presence is a minor comfort amid the storm's pressure; the rhythm of tongue and paw helps, as it always has. The rain would let up eventually, though. Sooner, with StarClan's blessing. That Edenberry would leave sooner too is a necessary consequence: Cherryblossom assumes the warrior doesn't mind. Maybe they would even leave while the rain still fell.

@edenberry ?!

skyclan deputy | "speech." | tags​

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[edenberry ?!]

Spring-soft song dribbles down the arching leaves that create a make-shift shelter... an umbrella of nature to delicately redirect the toiling thrumming of warm-aired storm. The loss of the sun's hot rays bring a chill with the downpour and a reminder of a kit-squealed conversation that said that maybe they lost their power when not blessed by its light. That they must whisk away, chase the horizon where it sleeps and return only when she dares peak open honey-gold eyes. Closing their own in peaceful comfort, the touch of petal-pink plush pads against their brow is hard not to flinch against, if only for the memory buried in welted skin... Edenberry takes in a quiet, deep breath to still their anxious heart-beat, a hymn of reassurance repeated as mantra.

It's just Cherryblossom.... I am safe.

In the delicate walls of a home away from home there was no need to fear her mindless tracing. A murmur hardly above the din of the rain asks a question often repeated and one they loathed to answer; an uncomfortable guilt tickled at the ends of their ears, nibbled at the space between their toes, pulled the muscles of their legs taut with remorse. Ink-stained fur shifts to reach for the spot just under her chin, swiping a few quick licks of wispy, cloud-curled fur as if it might take the sting out of their departure to have touched her so tenderly before leaving.

"I can stay a bit longer," they answer in a hum that grazes her ear, nose touching ever so slightly as if fearful of it recoiling. "But... if the storm bothers you I can stay until you fall asleep..." Their eyes wet at the thought, that there have been nights which they've left her here in her nest alone to shiver against the rolling thunder and feel abandoned. Their face pinches in confusion of their own mournful heart, surprised by the intensity of their tearful dismay on behalf of coal-fire love left widowed in darkest hours.

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𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 〰 i can still hear you sing

• -- edenberry / skyclan daylight warrior / any pronouns / 13 moons
  -- mostly white with black pinstripe and green eyes / scarred face and back / filling out where previously skinny
  -- color #728c69​

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[Cherryblossom]

Edenberry's strained breath, the tightening lace beneath egret feather fur, goes unnoticed beneath her absent gaze. Whiskers kiss the underside of her chin as the other stretches upwards, like raindrops falling in reverse, and Cherryblossom consciously stills her jaw at their touch. Warm breath spills slowly between snowcapped ears, a controlled trickle of breath rather than deep and even tides.

Edenberry's muted trill, the feather touch of just their voice, makes the tear of her ear twist away. "Mmm, it's okay," she quietly responds, releasing part of the tail tucked around them both to flick it. The fact that they noticed her apprehension at all is slightly mortifying. It gives her no comfort to know she is that obvious about it, quavering like an abandoned chick in the dark of her nest, her dignity as absent as Twitchbolt's is most of the time. Of course Edenberry would know something about that.

It's so plainly wrong to compare her lover to another's, but she shrug the base foreignness of the green eyes that stare into hers now. Like walking through a copse of pines devoid of SkyClan scent, she feels somewhat akin to a traveller passing through familiar lands when she returns their gaze. Like she could choose to make her home here, but nothing would ever compare to home.

She chooses to tighten her tail around their smaller frame. "Like, I'll be fine." The attempt at reassurance could just be a bid for independence, but it's unknown beneath the infection of casuality. Finally, her gaze slips downwards. The surprise that blinks through her is, as always, trailed by guilt. "If you really want to, that's okay too..." The idea of company feels a bit suffocating in the wake of Applefrost, Dandelionwish, and Jaypaw, but hey... the warriors' den has more space now.

skyclan deputy | "speech." | tags​

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[edenberry ?!]

The set of teeth against one another grind in their uncertainty, the brush of feathered tail against the ground enough to give rise to a swell of anxiousness- it was hard to crack her, that stubborn pinecone shell that jutted between cloudy tufts of cotton fur to jab into the tender flesh of anyone that pressed too near it. Edenberry wonders how long it's been there... if it always had been or if they'd only just begun to notice it more recently. Is she angry with me, the thought flutters by on butterfly-fragile wings, mulling over all the things they've missed. They weren't here for every grievous laceration to her heart... hadn't been there to comfort her through the sanguine splattered memory of her aunt.

It's hard to empathize with.. that feeling of family and the loss that came with it. The nearest they can offer is brindle-striped recollections, daffodil-kissed confessions. It isn't the same. Ears that rival a rabbit's for their size swivel as if searching the ambiance for answers... if there is hidden wisdom in the pattern of the rain drops that might tell them the right answer. To stay... or to leave her to her thoughts...

Cherryblossom is private, reserved, restrained.... distant.

Finally, the warm touch of her tail returns to wrap around them, gangly and alike the twigs they wander beneath in dappled canopy though more sturdy in the last few weeks than ever before. A hopeless part of them leans into it fervently, as if it were a much needed cure to the aching in their chest. "I know you will," it was never a question of her ability to manage, only ever a constant battle to be invited to vulnerable spaces and keep them safe, "I won't crowd you."

The invitation feels half as sincere as they'd like it to be, a measured answer that says their free will is theirs rather than a child-hearted plea for the moment to last longer. "Would it be alright if I brought you a gift tomorrow? The flowers are blooming again... Maybe then it won't feel like I'm away as often. I'd stay if I wasn't worried about Spicepaw but... without Hazelbeam to take her home I don't have anyone else I can really trust to make sure she doesn't..." The will to explain where the concern comes from dies in their throat- Cherryblossom is just as aware as they are what happened to Jaypaw and they'd rather not see it relived in cinnamon-velvet fur.

"Are you sure you're not upset I have to go?"

They aren't sure where the question comes from or why it chooses now to summon itself but... there's no taking it back. If cats like Slate and Silversmoke were so willing to admit their evening departures were a source of contention then did their deputy share that same frustration?

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𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 〰 i can still hear you sing

• -- edenberry / skyclan daylight warrior / any pronouns / 13 moons
  -- mostly white with black pinstripe and green eyes / scarred face and back / filling out where previously skinny
  -- color #728c69​

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