who are we, anymore? [damaskrose]


Aug 1, 2022


Despite his name, Cold hadn't always been so cold. He could remember a time long ago, before the great battle and before the split of the marsh group, where he'd been a happy kid. Energetic, ambitious, and confidently proclaiming his desire to become one of the best hunters and fighters in the group, Cold had been an outgoing, optimistic child, even if he had been a bit rough in his approach to life. He'd been just as easy to befriend as he was to pick a fight with, but he'd always been surrounded by others.

These days, Coldpaw was seldom found with anyone in tow. He'd lost his parents in the great battle. Had been abandond by his siblings and friends, all of whom had left to join the other groups. The marsh, once so familiar and easily seen as a part of his future, had become a stranger to him all at once it seemed. And he couldn't bring himself to stay.

Now he was a Windclan cat, something he chose to take great pride in. Forget the marsh group, forget the others- all that mattered from this point on was the loyalty that Sootstar would teach to her warriors, and it was they who he intended to call his new found family. But there was still a lot to come before those days, he knew. He was still hurt over the loss of his family and friends, still frustrated that the marsh group had been allowed to fall apart so easily. Bitteress and anger were very much alive in him, and one of the reasons he'd gone with Windclan at all was because Sootstar at least understood the importance of loyalty. There was no way she'd ever let her clan split apart like Briar had, starclan cats or not.

Lingering on the edge of camp as if he wished to go out, Cold could be found taking a moment to clean the blood from his claws that had gotten there from his hunt earlier.

windclan apprentice - male - 10 months - bisexual - polyamorous - single - a tall, muscular tabby with dark grey fur

Damask Rose rememberd Cold from before he had become this scary cat he was today. The two might never have been close but it was not like they didn't know the other existed. At least that was the case for Rose. Just like with Leech, Cold had dealt with alot of pain after the great battle. Leech's mother had abandoned him after the rest of Leech's siblings had got run over by monsters, and Cold had lost his parents. Damask Rose couldn't possibly imagine how it felt to lose a family member. Sure, his family might not be the nicest to him but they where still his family and losing any of them would have hurt him badly. So he felt for Cold, just like he did with Leech. Both where hurt and both needed someone there for them right now more then anything else. How anyone not could see that beside him was heart tearing sometimes. The way his clanmates could behave without even trying to understand the whole picture. Kindness took you so much longer in life. It gave so much more in the end. At least that was what he wanted to believe. He wanted to be someone who helpt someone out from a difficult time. That would make him feel good about himself because he had done something nice for somebody else.

Aha, out in the practise though it was so much more difficult. Rose wasn't even as close to brave as he wished to be. Often he failed to be the cat he deeply wished to be. Cats like Cold was very intimating and scary to approach just like it had been with Leech and...even Jaw. He had all but been lucky there. It was his siblings who had dared him to speak with Jaw, the scary cold cat with a monsterous scarred face. But he had and slowly they had become friends. Leech?. Aha...same luck there. Leech had been so vunerable when he had found him that night after his mother had left him that he hadn't even had the strenght to snap back at him. It had been a long night but he had been there for them and now?. Rose wanted to believe they had grown closer since then. Leech was a bit nicer towards him now. Both of this cases just showed to him you couldn't judge a cat by thier fur!. If just trying to get to know them, to dig past that facade a heart would get discovered.

That was why he refused to judge, why he refused to believe that cats like Cold was....heartless. They where just hurt and if just someone could show them a bit of kindness then maybe they could start to believe in the world again. Even Sootstar he know had a good side. Just look at the way she was treating her kits!. No one could possibly say she didn't love them...so she was capable to love and care as well. She might be cruel but she wasn't bad. The same went with Cold. After seeing what he had done earlier towards that loner which had been so different to the Cold he know from the swamp land...he knew something was going on beyond the surface. The question was if he could do something to help. Rose wasn't sure but he didn't wanted to be a coward forever...He wanted to let Cold know that he was there for them!.

" Uhm, h-hi Cold.." He would speak lowly from behind them, distance between them just in case Cold not appreciated other cats to get to close. " I uhm, wanted to make sure that you...where okay?." He meant after the fight with loner, if he had got hurt or anything. But if he could be honest it was just an excuse to have a reason to approach them. Noticing that blood on his claws though made his whole face turn pale, and he would stare with a sickness growing inside of him. He really wasn't good with blood...it was making him feel a bit dizzy... " Uh, uhm is that...is that blood?...yours..." he started to stumbled over his words, the world spinning a bit as he did not felt so good all of the suddenly....

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Cold had gotten used to the solitude he'd imposed upon himself by now. He never went asking for social interaction and in turn nobody ever offered him any, probably because he looked far from approachable with that cold glare of his. And because he was in that akward in-between stage where he wasn't a kit that needed looking after, but also wasn't an adult that Soot could call upon to work full time, the gray tabby managed to fly under the radar a lot of the time. And to be honest, he preferred it that way. Maybe he wouldn't always, but for now? It was nice. He didn't have to worry about anyone but himself or focus on anything other than what he felt like doing. And so he spent a lot of time isolated, exploring the moors or teaching himself to hunt and fight. He could just clear his mind and pretend nothing else existed outside of the moment he was currently in.

"uhm, h-hi Cold..."

Pointed ears would twitch backwards toward the voice, noting who it was before he even turned to look. Maybe he didn't interact with anyone and made a point to avoid them, but he was observant by nature and tended to keep vague tabs on those around him. Maybe it was his own paranoia, but he preferred to call it 'logic' and move on with his day- after all, what kind of idiot wouldn't want to know the cats he was going to be living with? Maybe he didn't want to talk to them or get all buddy-buddy, but knowing their strengths and weaknesses, knowing who was reliable and who wasn't- that kind of thing could save your life one day.

Though, he very much doubted he'd ever been in a position where Rose would end up saving him and not vice-versa. Rose was a nice cat, but that was just the problem- they were too nice. Liable to get themselves walked all over. And soft too, something he was reminded of when their gaze fell to his claws and they nervously asked him if the blood was his own. It was the words before those that stuck with him though, prompting curiosity and confusion to stir. Checking to see if he was..?

"Why wouldn't I be okay?" he asked, genuine confusion coating the words before he realized that Rose had been at the border when he'd chased off that loner. Was that what he meant? It had to be. It was the only interaction they'd had 'together' at all since joining Windclan. "Oh, you mean the border thing? I'm fine." he added, sitting up and turning to face the other as if to prove they weren't hurt. "The bloods from some prey I caught before I came back to camp. Had to blow off some steam."

His tone was neutral as he spoke, guarded just like everything else about him. He didn't dislike Rose. He may have thought they were too weak to really cut it out here, but they were a good cat and he wasn't about to be cruel to them for no reason. Cold may be blunt and unfriendly, but he wasn't evil.

windclan apprentice - male - 8 months - a large, dark grey tabby with yellow eyes