YOU COULD LET IT ALL GO | return from skirmish


She’s tilting as she runs, her vision is going double, but she doesn’t care.
Morningpaw is dying in Skyclans camp.
The horrifying thought creeps up her spine, infected her brain, pushing her over each dead shrub, it’s what gets her down the ravine when she almost slips and succumbs to the pain that burns in her chest.
Bowing her head, the apprentice barrels through the entrance, seemingly unscathed, but her eyes are saucers when she lifts them.
She tries to yowl for her leader, her deputy- but only a gargled croak comes out at first.
I can’t breathe.
"! Howling Wind!" She calls desperately for the two mollies, shakily falling onto her haunches.
She isn’t sure how many heartbeats have passed before she see’s one of the two- not that it would really matter, she couldn’t hear her heart anymore.
"Morning…Skyclan… attacked. Morning… didn’t wake up!" Her words are creaky as her voice splinters, but she knows the rest of the patrol isn’t too far behind.
"can’t breathe…" she chokes. Yet, she did her job- a poor one, but she made it back to camp. Her breaths are airless hitches. "Th…" her sentence is cut short, and her body crumbles under the lack of oxygen when she slumps.

[ CONTINUATION OF THIS THREAD! The rest of the patrol is not too far behind Roepaw, who has just succumbed to a severe asthma attack and fainted.


The warrior stumbles into camp, shock and pain finally catching up to him. He's bleeding. He's hurt. But, he can't find a reason to care. Can't find it when his vision blurs, and all that he can see, all that's etched into his mind is blood-stained snow, is pointed-fur limp within red, is broken allyship, is... is...

"I didn't-- I don't... I didn't mean--" His words are staggered, unsteady. Started sentences never finished, never able to find their way. I didn't mean for this to happen. He tries to say. It's all my fault, he knows.

Shouts from Roepaw echo through his ears. The kid who claimed he was a savior, moments before war broke out. Moments before life was sliced into, taken to the stars. Finchcatcher isn't a savior. Will never be one, because every time he tries to help, he only causes pain and loss and --

She collapses, sinks to the ground and Finchcatcher shouts, fearing Roepaw too will make a trek to the stars. They can't lose two. He can't be the cause for even more pain.

Over a squirrel, he reminds himself.

nightbird limps back into camp, burning too hot with anger to speak the whole trek back. what good was it to be allies with another clan? friendly, yet willing to attack over one piece of prey that could maybe feed two cats? snow and grass kicked up behind her as she walked. they would pay for their greed.

she watches finchcatcher stumble in, spewing unfinished sentences. blaming himself. she couldn't take it, wouldn't allow it. they were attacked over a matter that could have been easily resolved with words. she didn't have too many friends, but weren't they supposed to share? to help each other in times of need? "you did nothing wrong. they drew unnecessary blood. we were attacked. they showed they were unwilling to resolve a simple matter with words. you were just doing your job," she stated gruffly, eyes narrowed in the injured tom's direction. nightbird was never the supportive type, and that wasn't what she was trying to achieve here either. those were simply the facts. an unruly apprentice started it, and ended it with morningpaw's blood on his paws.

the thing that really ruffled her was that it wasn't supposed to be the softspoken girl who died. the skyclanner had been aiming for lightpaw. it would have been him they grieved over. a small part of her was glad that it wasn't. that would mean she had failed, and she was more terrified of that than any sharp clawed opponent.

the molly paused, with the adrenaline fading quickly her leg began throbbing quite uncomfortably. that skyclan fool. it was just beginning to stop bothering her so much. a heavy sigh passed her lips. as she gazed across the cats that had returned, cool toned eyes fell upon the limp body of roepaw. no, she refused. nobody else was going to lose a life over skyclan's insolence. nightbird rushed over to the pale apprentice, gritting her teeth through the pain. she craned her neck down so she could place an ear close to roepaw's nose. she was breathing. it was ragged and weak, but she was not dead yet. "get berryheart, now!" she yelled with intense urgency to anyone that was listening. "you will not die today." the warrior declared to the passed out girl, not caring if her words fell upon deaf ears. she spoke them as a threat. a promise that if roepaw fell upon starclan's ranks, she would go there herself and drag her back. nobody else was dying over this damned squirrel.
[ ☾✩ ]


It had been a peaceful morning in camp by comparison of the events happening elsewhere. Flycatcher simply went about his business, unaware of what was about to happen.

The desperate cries of his apprentice calling out for Emberstar draws the lead warrior over, but the smell of blood and arrival of more wounded clanmates gives him pause. Roepaw promptly passes out and Flycatcher comes to her side, quick to check over his apprentice. "Somebody fetch, Berryheart," He begs. And then his attention switches to the returning clanmates, confusion and worry in his gaze. "What happened? Roepaw mentioned something about Morningpaw...and SkyClan attacked?"
WE HAVE YET TO CRASH ✧°.☀ ————————————
As Lightpaw trailed back to camp in silence, the adrenaline fading from his veins, he only became increasingly more aware of how he felt. The blood that stuck to his face and paws uncomfortably, the way it matted his fur from his wounds. His wounds themselves, burning against the cold open air, although he did his best to pointedly stare ahead and hide his slight limp. He was sore and battered from being grabbed and shoved around, from running and leaping and grappling.

His mind kept replaying that moment over and over in his mind. That raw fear he had felt when that apprentice, Snowpaw, had leaped at him. The tear of flesh when Morningpaw got in the way. Could that have been him, bleeding out on the earth? Would he be dead right now if it weren't for her? Behind him, his tail trembled, although he lashed it in an effort to mask it.

Suddenly, Lightpaw felt filthy. He felt sick. His senses still felt flooded with the smell and taste of blood, and the fur of the squirrel in his mouth was nauseating. He wanted to drop it. He wanted to run. Pulling in a stuttering breath through his nose, he tried his hardest to swallow it back and force it down. He wouldn't let himself waver so easily. He couldn't. He wasn't that weak. Was he?

Lightpaw was weak. He was.

In that fight, he was nothing. He had been removed from that warrior so easily like he was nothing more than a kit. Nightbird, she...

He was pathetic. Even Morningpaw had to save him, and because of that, she was dead.

By the time they reached camp, there was a whole new flurry of panic. Roepaw was on the ground, unmoving. What? When had she been hurt? Who had she been fighting? It was- Snowpaw. He had gone for her. Lightpaw's claws sank into the earth, staring at his Clanmate but unable to move.

He should have killed him. He should have killed him. He should have killed him while he had the chance.

Lightpaw nearly flung the squirrel to the ground, sinking down with it as he choked on a sob.

[penned by its_oliverr - ]

This was serious he could tell. Something bad had been happening out there. All of them come back injured and wounded, panic and distress in their eyes. Still, he couldn't help himself by wondering who Morningpaw was. He was quite sure he was expected to remember his clanmates and their names. Shallowpaw couldn't think about that right now though. They had clearly asked for something that he actually could do to help. Someone get Berryheart. That he could do which was better than him just standing around here doing absolutely nothing useful. So the apprentice turned himself around and hurried himself over to the medicine cat den. " I think cats are dying out there. You should help." he called in to thier medic, staring at them from the entrance with his violet-blue unblinking eyes. He was sure that would do the trick.

// interacting with @BERRYHEART


Just what had gone down out there at the border? Sunnyday looked on with shell-shocked horror when Roepaw arrived gasping for breath, trying to get words of warning out before ultimately fainting. He sprang from where he had been sat by the warriors den in order to hurry to her side. "Roepaw! Steady... steady..." He looked on with helplessness before he craned his head round so he could call for the medicine cat. "Berryheart! Hurry!" Alas, this day was going to be a tough one for the other tom. A bitter taste of what being a medicine cat was going to be like.

He aimed to rest a paw on Roepaw's shoulder before casting his gaze across those who were arriving back. 'What a mess... so many injuries...', what had even caused such good allies to come to such vicious blows? "What in StarClan happened out there?" He held back the desire to snap, to let the bubbling anger get the better of him. Between Roepaw, Lightpaw, and whatever fate had befallen Morningpaw, it was too many suffering apprentices for his liking! Someone had messed up big time and he wanted to know who!


He'd had a runny nose most the day, was irritated over it because the itching was so bothersome and it kept him from napping comfortable so most his morning had been spent sniffling and watching the cats around the camp, chiding the occasional kitten and bidding farewell to the hunting patrols. His guilt at his lack of productivity was balanced by how busy he felt in the nursery with so many kittens suddenly dropped uncereminiously upon him. Sunfreckle had debated several times talking to Sunnyday about the newcomers but he hadn't the time and wasn't sure if his prying was needed.
There were other things to fret over, such as the lack of prey on their pile and when the patrol earlier had set out he went to give them all a cheerful goodbye and 'good hunting', a small pause to smile encouragingly at Morningpaw who kept looking to the nursery so much in her off time he worried she might not cry. When she was older and had her own kits, she might sing a different tune to his comfort or she could even enjoy it so much she stay their longterm; it was a possible future he himself had considered. For now though, every apprentice was shooed off to get to work and he enjoyed the brief silence before the storm laying in a warm patch of sun near the center of camp before the clouds took it away.

The was until Roepaw burst from the edge of the camp, wheezing and sputtering and he bolted upright in sheer panic before rushing forward alongside Flycatcher and Sunnyday and he locked green eyes with Nightbird briefly before whipping his head around to the camp's boundary once more.
Morning...didn't wake up. Where was the rest of the patrol? Where were the others?! Where was Flamewhisker? Where was Morningpaw?! Wolfwind?!
Sunfreckle, once assured Berryheart was being fetched for the hyperventilating apprentice, turned and ran to the last spot he'd seen Howling Wind herself dolling out patrols and orders, "HOWLING! EMBERSTAR!"
Something had happened, he was too scared to know exactly what...


Rabbitnose had just heard words he never wanted to hear. He turned from the far side of the clearing and rushed over, Sparkpaw following him. He had been telling him about his training, how cool his mentor was, and Rabbitnose was happy to hear it.

But the air changed so quickly and drastically that terror had vice gripped them hard enough for it to have no meaning.

"What's wrong- Did I hear Skyclan attacked?" Rabbitnose asked frantically, unsure if he heard right.

Sparkpaw was more worried about Morningpaw. He looked around at the returning patrol with wide, fearful eyes. "WHAT HAPPENED TO MORNINGPAW!!??"

He never. Ever ever. Wanted to hear that someone wasn't waking up.

Why did everyone keep dying? It's not fair. None of this is fair. He looked down at Roepaw and trembled. Was she not going to wake up either? Berryheart was on his way, but he.....He hoped with all his heart that Roepaw would make it.

"Please don't die, Roepaw...!!" He begged.

That's all he could do. Beg.

There was commotion in the air beyond Berryheart's understanding- a constant notion as of late, and one that drew from him hardly-tangible but very real frustration. So often now did he miss events due to other responsibilities, or simply the duty he had to stay put where everyone knew where to find him; and, after being specifically called for and fetched (as if he needed collecting), Berryheart could see what everyone was yelling about. Something about SkyClan- skirmish- among the words was thrown in the name of one of his nieces, but what lay before him was no fleeting word- no, it was Fawny. Fainted from her breathlessness, he could guess- in the past he remembered feeling faint, and if he overexerted himself...

Urgency pushed him forward, waded him through the crowd. "Move, please-" he said- he needed to be fast. By the time he was in and out of his den the crowd had slightly cleared, and he forged his path toward her, berries on board. From her earlier attack they had learned what worked for her, the best way he knew to treat her no-breath- juniper berries. But she needed to be awake to eat them.

Calm exterior as stony-still as ever, Berryheart began to shake the apprentice, attempting to wake her up. "Get up," he urged, stern and hurried, voice beginning to slip from its well-pronounced state in his rush. But- but she wasn't waking up, and she needed to eat the berries, or-

Forcing her mouth open with his paws, he began to puppeteer her jaw so she would chew the dosage of juniper. If she didn't wake, even forcibly ingesting these berries would hopefully be enough to at least get her breathing back to normal. "Breathe, like we talked about," he urged her as he worked, though whether or not she could hear him was debatable.
Howling Wind is not nearby when Roepaw crashes into camp. At first, she deems the noise as nothing more than rambunctious apprentices scuffling about. She continues speaking with one of her warriors, ears flicking in response to the noise but otherwise she is dismissive. Hearing the report of the latest patrol is important, after all.

There's a scream. The tabby doesn't dismiss it as easily. Mid-sentence, she whips her head around just as Sunfreckle yowls her name. Blood. Blood has hit her nose and she's not walking, she's running. She slides to a halt at Roepaw's side, eyes stretched wide with alarm as Berryheart swiftly treats the girl. Her frightened gaze roams over the gathered cats, noticing the bleeding, noticing the name that keeps getting repeated. "Somebody tell me what happened," She barks sharply, fear laced in her voice. "Where is Morningpaw?"

once berryheart had reached roepaw, she stepped back. give them space. huddling around wouldn't change fate. she looked around spotting lightpaw, slumped with the squirrel at his feet. nightbird paused, afraid that his injuries had been worse than they appeared. but that wasn't why he was all hunched over. no, he was crying. she decided to give him space, at least until he could calm down a bit. no productive conversation between the two could be had in their current states.

with a small frown she listened to all the cats demanding to know what happened, but howling wind's sliced through the rest. she turned her head toward the deputy, speaking loud enough so the older molly could hear her over all the commotion in camp. "our patrol had chased a squirrel over the border without realizing. once we caught it, a skyclan patrol showed up and one of their apprentice's attacked us," she began, purposefully leaving names out of her explanation. why did it matter who did what? it would have ended the same. "morningpaw, they took her back to dawnglare. she had jumped in front of an attack and was bleeding, a lot. flamewhisker went with her," she added, but more slowly. nearly cautious in her word choice.
[ ☾✩ ]


It had been a day like any other for the young ebony warrior. Her kits had all gone about their respective duties as had she. Nothing in her mind had made this day stand out as one that would change the course of her life forever. No indication or warning of what was to come. What could she have done? She would ask the question over and over again later but for now she sees Roepaw and with a smile she turns her head, expecting to see her children there with her, expecting to ask them about their day.

The smile falls off her face when instead of a full patrol of her family and clanmates she is greeted by the image of Roepaw staggering into camp, bloodied. She murmurs something about Morningpaw, about her not waking up and immediately Little Wolf pushes the thought away. No, that was impossible. She had just seen Morningpaw before she left. She had been fine. Nothing could have happened to her on the Sky Clan border, she would be safe there. She was a Sky Clanner by blood after all. Other cats chime in, but Little Wolf does not hear them, she stares dumbfounded at the bloody she cat before them, processing.

When Nightbird speaks she turns, blinking slowly like waking up from a daze. "That can’t be- I-" she stammers, choking back a sob. Attack? Squirrel? She cannot take in the information fast enough. She turns to her mother. "My-my kit" she whimpers. She feels so pathetic. Why hadn’t she gone with them? She could’ve protected her. "Shell be fine right?" she asks, head swinging to fix Nightbird with a watery green gaze. "It was- it was just a few scratches right? Nothing Dawnglare can’t fix…." her voice wavers but she has to believe it. Her baby had to be okay…
Nightbird's words cause a stone to form in the she-cat's stomach. She stares intensely at her, processing. "They what?" She trills anxiously. A SkyClan apprentice attacked an entire ThunderClan hunting patrol? Who? And then she hears her granddaughter had been taken to SkyClan's camp? "They what?!" She repeats herself, voice rising. Why didn't they bring her back here? To her family, her uncle that could have treated her? She needs to be here when she's hurt.

Little Wolf looks to her, and Howling Wind looks back, brows tented with concern. "Sh-She'll be okay, Little Wolf," She quickly assures, trying her best to stay calm. She steps closer, pressing herself against her daughter and twining their tails in an effort to comfort her. "We'll get her home soon." She looks back to Nightbird, "You said Flamewhisker is with her?" That's a relief...there are few warriors the deputy trusts more than Flamewhisker. She'll keep an eye on her granddaughter. She'll make sure Dawnglare is giving her his very best care.


"Yeah, Flamewhisker is with her. Same for a couple of Morningpaw's siblings." Blackmoon chimed in as he appeared back in the camp. Unlike the others he carried no injuries, though that was purely thanks to his arrival so late into the fray. He cast a glance Finchcatcher's way, pleased to see that the other tom had made it back. Though he could tell that many carried emotional wounds alongside their physical ones. This was a day that ThunderClan wouldn't soon forget. The black furred tom exhaled quietly as he looked around, spying Roepaw in a poor way, and of course Little Wolf in distress. He longed to give her some hope, but how could he bring himself to lie when he held so many doubts about the apprentice's chances of surviving?