- Aug 9, 2022
- 343
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[Medicine Cat Meeting Thread]
He staggered back into camp, no facade of pleasantries or mask of optimism, no attempt to hold himself with any dignity; his paws scraped across the earth and he wondered if it would not be easier to just drop where he stood than force himself into the view of his clanmates as he trudged onward to his den. Dandelionwish was a cat with hope, a cat who thought he could change things and make the world better but time and again he was proven wrong. He was not skilled enough to keep his clan alive, he was still untrained, there was no support and even the stars were silent; perhaps they had abandoned him after all.
Perhaps he was not meant for this path as he so thought. Perhaps…
It was as if the world had become so much more sharp, his vision splintering into ice like the coming cold, everything and everyone wanted WindClan to die and why should he keep fighting to sustain it. Why should he continue pushing when the wall before him would never once give. What was the point of it all, the purpose. Was he just destined to fail? The sepia point's tail lashed in a rare display of internal outrage bubbling up to the surface. He could not even be mad at Dawnglare nor SkyClan, he could not be angry with anyone but his own foolish ideals. He remembered following Honeytwist around, cowering behind her as Sootstar marked her loyal supports with claws, cut Kestreltalon's eye from her face, sent so many cats away from the moors without a single thought to their fates. He wanted to scream, cry, but more importantly than all of it...he wanted to die. He wanted to see Rosepaw again, he wanted to not carry the burden any longer.
When he finally reached the camp kicking snow in his haste to reach his den he parted the leaves like a curtain on his final performance and nearly walked directly into Juniperfrost perched at the edge of the den area.
"You're back so quick-why?" The ticked tabby asked incredulous and he wanted to swing at the bastard's face in an impulsive panic to avoid answering the question but instead he let it all tumble out, tears bubbling up and voice catching as he tried not to break down again like he had with Wisteriapaw's death.
"We...we...need catmint, there has to be a way to get it-I can't get it anywhere else and SkyClan told me no but there has to ....has to be...I can't...I don't know what to do...we're gonna....everyone is....LEAVE ME ALONE!" With a shoulder push to the much larger tom that did not move the blue tabby in the slightest, Dandelionwish gave a choked and broken whimper of a noise as he quickly retreated to his den and swept himself inside to the back. If had not been so broken down, so on the verge of losing it, he might have been more mindful with his words; but he'd not thought once about them as he crumbled.
Juniperfrost frowned, eyes wide at the display, before turning to the other cat on night guard with him and in a cool tone spoke, "Get Sootstar."